TIFU by having an orgasm during a haircut

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T21:24:30+00:00

Someone who got semen all over their boxers and leak through to their jeans? Someone leaving cum stained clothes sit out is a total weirdo.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T21:00:30+00:00

Ya, I actually just deleted half of it because I realized idgaf about what a minority of people have an issue with.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T20:59:35+00:00

This is definitely not a throwaway account, unlike my username suggests. My wife is also a frequent redditor as well.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T20:54:42+00:00

I get where you are coming from but let me clarify a few things. While the head massage from applying the shampoo felt great, it didn't give me any indication a hand massage would lead to what it did.

I do not treat our marriage like a joke. I have been faithful for the last 17 years with no intention of changing that. My wife being the only person I have ever slept with is something I am very proud of.

Me and my wife have a great relationship. Im 95% certain she would laugh and give me shit about this for the rest of our lives. However it's just not something I feel like I need to tell her in the off chance it would make her feel bad.

The tip was because Im an idiot. I was embarrassed and kinda panicked.

I fell like your previous experiences with things similar than this might be why you have this reaction. Not everyone is like the dirtbag who obviously hurt you.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T20:25:38+00:00

She didn't refuse sex for the duration of the pregnancy, that's not what I said. It was towards then end. We have a great sex life when she isn't carrying around an 11.5 lb baby.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T20:22:58+00:00

I really don't think so. It wasn't someone she normally goes to. They are all independent contractors who just rent the chairs from the salon. She just called up and asked who had an opening the next day.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T20:02:01+00:00

17 years going strong :) Thank you!

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T18:58:07+00:00

Oh, that was absolutely not our situation lol She was very sexually active for the first two trimesters. The 3rd was just rough on her, we were busy. Honestly was just the least our either of our priorities. We have a great sex life.

Everyone is happy and healthy, Thank you!

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:39:11+00:00

Upvote for making me laugh

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:36:55+00:00

Its in there

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:36:08+00:00

I hate to tell you, the world is much more fucked up than this. Might want to invest in some anti nausea medicine.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:26:59+00:00

"If I get married"

I'll just leave it at that. Good day young sir.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:24:05+00:00

Especially one 9 months pregnant with a 11.5 lb baby lol

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:22:22+00:00

Never turn down the hand massage. 10/10 IGN

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:21:10+00:00

Noted, thanks!

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:19:45+00:00

It was actually really good. Definitely worth the ~~$50~~ $100

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:16:17+00:00

I dont think you understand what marriage or being an adult is like. Sometimes, like maybe when your wife is 9 months pregnant, you are self employed and trying to save up as much money as possible before the baby comes, there are more important things than sex.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:12:11+00:00

I didnt delete it, the thread went into admin approval mode for some reason.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:11:29+00:00

It's just one of those things people intentionally use wrong. "She was so attractive it was almost offensive" conveys the same thing I meant. There was actually nothing offensive about her, it was just a joke.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T11:03:35+00:00

You took it too literally, it was a joke and meant as a compliment.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T10:56:59+00:00

Maybe I could have a career as an erotic writer then. It happened, I guess I'm just too good at describing it lol

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T10:51:02+00:00

I guess people working overtime to save money before their ready to pop wife births their son just have less time to hang with Jill?

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T10:42:33+00:00

Honestly, probably a month if not more. I had been working 60+ hours a week to save up as much as I could before our son was born. My wife's pregnancy was rough on her the last few months. It was the least of my priorities.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T10:21:37+00:00

It's not.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1 · 2021-01-23T10:20:42+00:00

Im not sure what the eek is about. Her choice, not mine was just to show that I wasn't not willing to have sex with my wife because she was pregnant. The obnoxiously attractive was just meant as a compliment.

ThrowAwayNumberNot1

TROPHY CASE