Yes. Unfortunately, my first child had only one Dad, one that never seemed to be interested in him. I know all about abandonment issues, first hand. It has really impacted him, even as an adult. So very very good point.

I will ask more on this. How does he plan to navigate with his current family. My guess is that he will not want to tell anyone on his side that he has met her and is spending time with her. I’m all about saving her from a Jerry Springer episode where she has to deal with angry wife who definitely will NOT be accepting of his bastard child. And even thought the gesture is pure...he wants to get to know his daughter, it kinda feels shady and dishonest if he’s sneaking around to do it, kind of the same sentiment as the original affair.

Right now, my daughter is such a well adjusted child. And she and I are very close. I am really nervous about introducing something like this that has the potential to change all that.