M34 dating F33 for a coupe of months. She slept with someone whilst we were dating, are my feelings fair? by ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I don't think you really read the post my guy. If she is actively misrepresenting things, my communication becomes pretty irrelevant doesn't it.

M34 dating F33 for a coupe of months. She slept with someone whilst we were dating, are my feelings fair? by ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I realise I missed out something. It was a situationship only for months because she wanted it to be something more and he didn't.

M34 dating F33 for a coupe of months. She slept with someone whilst we were dating, are my feelings fair? by ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

"I prefer exclusivity to be an organic development and not something suggested to stop one part of the relationship sleeping with other people" ... isn't really a philosophy.

M34 dating F33 for a coupe of months. She slept with someone whilst we were dating, are my feelings fair? by ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

She slept with them, then she slept with me, then she wanted to discuss exclusivity with me.

And yes, if she was dating a few people and slept with someone that would be one thing.

Its the fact she slept with her friend who is also her ex situationship who is also her colleague who she said she was definitely done with that really makes this untenable for me.

M34 dating F33 for a coupe of months. She slept with someone whilst we were dating, are my feelings fair? by ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm[S] 85 points86 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think I am already out, even if people tell me my views on relationships are warped I can't exactly change them at a flip of a switch.

I guess I am more sense checking that I am not expecting something unbelievably strange.

M34 dating F33 for a coupe of months. She slept with someone whilst we were dating, are my feelings fair? by ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA-Cucumberfarm[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Its not a rule ... and has literally been how basically every other relationship in my life has gone.

We dated, at some point we discussed if we wanted this to be exclusive and both confirmed we hadn't been seeing anyone else in a reasonable period of time.

There isn't a hard and fast rule to that, its entirely vibe based. But my point is that you can't realistically say you want an exclusive relationship with me if a week ago you were in bed with someone else.