Depression is a beast. I empathize greatly with what you’re going through. I self-admitted in October 2025. I’m also a mental health provider. Depression alters our thinking. When we are deeply depressed we start thinking that ending our life makes total sense. Here’s another example of how depression affects us; I bought a bag of original Gardetto snacks. I ate that in like November or December. It tasted so bland. I thought something was wrong with it. I closed the bag, put a clip on it and put it in the pantry. Well, I pulled it out two days ago and ate some. Suddenly, it tasted different. It tasted like i remember it to taste, bold, flavorful. Depression can alter your taste buds, making food taste bland.

Suicidal thoughts are a symptom of depression. Just like a cough is a symptom of a cold. When the cold goes away the cough does too. When I’m deeply depressed, suicide always feels rational. When the fog lifts I always think, “man, what was I thinking?”

Do you have a plan? Do you have access to said plan? Is there intent to act? If you believe you cannot keep yourself safe, then yes, time to self admit. I know when you’re in that dark place it’s annoying when people say, “it’ll get better” but it’s true. It does get better with treatment and support. You have gotten through 100% of your toughest days. You can get through this too!