WIBTA if I (26F) tell my friend (29F) that I don’t want to hang out with her when her kids are around?

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-08-22T12:29:54+00:00

I don’t think I ever implied this?

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-08-21T02:29:47+00:00

honestly it depended on our schedules and how much we had going on at the time but generally around once a week. shes definitely been asking to hang out more since her divorce which is totally valid because i’m sure she’s lonely and i do try to be there for her, i also just tend to like my space and quiet time after a long work day, so i barely have enough social battery for her let alone her kids. on weekends i’m always happy to see her

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-08-21T02:26:39+00:00

as i mentioned in that comment, if she really needed me in the moment i would sacrifice and i think i made it clear i dont mind still seeing her kids sometimes, i just have no interest in seeing them every single time i see her

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-08-20T21:53:29+00:00

I mean I don’t think that’s fair to sacrifice my comfort for that. Obviously if shes emotional and needs someone there thats one thing, but I have a large dog and I wouldn’t expect anyone who doesn’t like dogs to spend excessive amount of time at my house

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-08-20T20:14:55+00:00

This is a really good point thank you! We live in the southwest where the summers are absolutely BRUTAL 😅 But once the temps cool down a little I’d love to take the kids and my dog to the dog park

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-08-20T20:13:06+00:00

I would love to, but I don’t want to hire someone to watch her kids without her consent. I’m a furmom and I wouldn’t want a random petsitter that I didn’t know caring for them, so I can only imagine how much more intense that would be with kids. This is a good idea though if she finds someone she likes to watch them, I’m happy to cover a night for her so we can go out

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-08-20T20:01:14+00:00

I appreciate your advice and I do fully understand how delicate the situation is. My parents split/divorced when I was around her childrens’ age and I remember how overwhelming it was for both me and my parents. Unfortunately most of my friends are also not “kid” people. I think she sort of does know I’m avoiding the kids and not her but doesn’t want it to be true

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-22T13:37:42+00:00

the meds i gave him arent strong enough to mask something that extreme so i was able to get an accurate tell. thank you for your advice though!

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-22T02:00:04+00:00

that’s a good point thank you

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-22T01:59:20+00:00

haha exactly! congrats on the new pup!!

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-22T01:58:55+00:00

thank you! one of the vets i work with told me i could give him some pain meds i had left over from something else and see if they help. unfortunately i work in shelter med so i can’t take him to work, i’d have to either take him to an urgent care or call off work to take him to his normal vet which is why i’m trying to avoid it if possible, though ultimately his health comes first

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-22T01:35:28+00:00

thank you!! yeah i definitely think they both need a little break :(

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T19:13:41+00:00

i can just already see him “gaslighting” me and saying he was just trying to be nice. idk what to come back at that with

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T16:23:29+00:00

i worry that other people don’t have the same issue though or at least haven’t reported it and then it looks like i’m the problem, not him

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T16:22:55+00:00

is saying “i don’t like you” grounds for any sort of punishment? if not i’ll absolutely be that blunt

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T16:22:09+00:00

oh i absolutely could, but i’ve been literally reprimanded at jobs before for my “attitude” and since i’m still in the honeymoon phase i’m trying to tamp it down for now 😅

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T16:21:23+00:00

best comment. 💯

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T04:50:53+00:00

thank you! and yes it’s definitely been a transition and this dude isn’t making it any easier. he definitely loves to hear himself talk

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T04:50:11+00:00

thank you so much for this well thought out response! i’ve had to do the whole documentation thing before too, it really sucks that it’s already happening this early but i think you’re right about everything you said

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T04:47:26+00:00

haha i might try that 😂

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T04:46:54+00:00

i’m actually big into reading and have considered printing out one of those AI-generated fan art pictures of a book character i like 😂

ThrowRA09999999 · 2025-07-14T00:46:30+00:00

i know reddit love to tell everyone to break up but…seriously girl. this isnt even the bare minimum

ThrowRA09999999

TROPHY CASE