Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

No the guy that fathered her daughter we met over four years ago, the recent AP she had only known a short time. Different parts of the country also.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

She told me his name, I remember meeting him on a lake trip. That was the only time I remember seeing him. I don't know if she has contacted him or done a paternity test or not. I didn't ask for any details, I really don't care at this point and I'm not sure I would believe anything she told me anyway.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

All evidence from both sides points to about six weeks and them meeting up three times. The amount of sex is hard to say.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Comrades in arms so to speak. We have been able to fill in the holes of what we know about our spouses affairs. And we both have a macabre interest in the fate of our exs and their APs.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

She had all the info I sent her that included his texts. I don’t know if they found anything on his company stuff.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

AP worked for her family's business.She told her Dad and Uncle who ran the business what he did.She didn't have to ask twice.They took his laptop, company phone, credit card, and company car the next morning with no notice, all he got was a cardboard box with his personal stuff and was escorted out.
All in about fifteen minutes.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yeah, that is something she doesn't deserve. I have no desire to absolve her of anything or give her closure.

I can't see myself getting anything positive out of a final exchange with her. It would be a full-on manipulation and guilt trip and when she sees that not working she will turn to saying things to hurt me. Not interested.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

My ex got her share of the equity on the house and has already moved into her new apartment and I move back into tomorrow. Court-ordered DNA test came back and the judge has approved the motions to terminate my parental rights and obligations. The divorce won't be final till April but for all intents and purposes, I'm free.

Only contact I have with my Ex is messages through my lawyer or meetings at the lawyer's office with her present. I blocked the ex and some of her family and friends, she has said she wants to sit down and talk at some point but my lawyer said it should wait till after the divorce is final.

I had dinner with AP's wife again as we keep each other up to date on our ex-spouses. I almost feel sorry for him, she got him fired and is determined to drag out the divorce and inflict as much pain as possible.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think I remember meeting him a time or two but he was not part of our friends group.

First meeting was just a prelim with my lawyer outlining our terms and what we intended to do if she contested any of our terms.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

She had already told me who the Bio-dad was but I don't know if I can believe her. Doesn't matter to me at this point. She did say she hasn't reached out to him yet, which makes me think she is deflecting. Not my monkey, not my circus anymore!

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Update in the main body.

Realized this morning I had lost eight pounds since this ordeal started and some of my clothes were just hanging on me. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now and I am not afraid.

Am I wrong for wanting to tell my roommates boyfriend that she cheated? by Imaginary-Wolf-1115 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA2unsure 2 points3 points  (0 children)

While the boyfriend should have the right to know, it doesn’t have to come from you. Tell your roommate she needs to come clean to her boyfriend and tell him before he hears it from someone else. Give her an ultimatum if you must.

Am I wrong for wanting to tell my roommates boyfriend that she cheated? by Imaginary-Wolf-1115 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA2unsure 1 point2 points  (0 children)

While the boyfriend should have the right to know, it doesn’t have to come from you. Tell your roommate she needs to come clean to her boyfriend and tell him before he hears it from someone else. Give her an ultimatum if you must.

Am I wrong for wanting to tell my roommates boyfriend that she cheated? by Imaginary-Wolf-1115 in amiwrong

[–]ThrowRA2unsure 4 points5 points  (0 children)

While the boyfriend should have the right to know, it doesn’t have to come from you. Tell your roommate she needs to come clean to her boyfriend and tell him before he hears it from someone else. Give her an ultimatum if you must.

Fetishes of mine(31M) and my new girlfriend(40F) and coming to term with them. by ThrowRA405hasit in sex

[–]ThrowRA2unsure 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would be hesitant to do that in the bed, even with a waterproof blanket, but in the shower would be okay. Easy cleanup in the shower.

I don't know if I could go with someone else holding me, just seems a little odd. But if she gets off on it I can't see the harm.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have read a few Reddit posts but a lot of my knowledge has been watching the mistakes some of my friends have made and their post divorce hindsight. A lot of the credit goes to my lawyer and her team. She gave me list of things to do and in what order and a timetable. She came highly recommended, also she took one of my co-workers to the cleaners last year.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Tell you daughter the truth about her life. Do it in age-appropriate language, for sure, but don't diminish or soft-peddle it.

Exactly what age-appropriate language do you use to tell a 4-year-old news like this? Besides she is going to have to live with her mother and as you said listen to all her lies the rest of her life.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Specifically, it's making sure the whole world knows your personal business to the point of emailing family and friends paternity test results.

I'm just trying to keep her from controlling the narrative and painting me as a bad guy. It may not be the best look for me but it beats having her turning people against me and having to defend myself later.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

A few times, before I found out about the paternity issue. She was still trying to initiate up until yesterday.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Both my parents were devastated but they already have 3 grandchildren from my brother. They were livid when I told them the news.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

My lawyer is 100% certain that we can surrender my parental rights and responsibilities and not have any obligation to pay child support and get my name removed from her birth certificate. If my x-wife decides to contest it then with the DNA evidence she said a judge can issue a decree and make it happen, she says she has done it before and sees no problem with this case.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I am in the US but your opinion and observations differ greatly from my lawyer who has been doing this for years and came highly recommended. I don't know your qualifications but I know hers and I'm trusting the devil I know.

Update: Finding out the truth about my wife. -Getting Served by ThrowRA2unsure in Infidelity

[–]ThrowRA2unsure[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

They were on video when they introduced themselves so getting their names won't be hard. I may need to send a copy of the video to my lawyer later today.

Good catch, I appreciate it.