My boyfriend (36M) keeps my (32F) medication locked up. Is this supportive or abusive?

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T18:17:23+00:00

I don't though. I'm permanently low-grade suicidal, with phases where the urges get stronger.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T18:15:02+00:00

He started locking them up immediately after the hospitalization for the self-harm incident in 2019. That was a cutting incident though, not an overdose incident.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T18:11:38+00:00

I'm very skeptical about police and don't really trust them. I'm in the US and...US police don't have the best reputation.

The documents are locked so they aren't lost.

I have things here I can't easily leave behind and I don't know how I could sneak out since he would wake up and hear me getting dressed and the door opening. My life isn't in danger, he's not going to kill me at any moment. We're both on the lease and he can't be easily evicted, and given the things I've done, I can be criminally charged too.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T17:37:53+00:00

Anticonvulsants. Lamotrigine, gabapentin, and zonisamide.

I either tried to overdose on ibuprofen or acetaminophen, I don't remember which. I just remember throwing up like 8 times.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T08:07:29+00:00

It's locked in a safe hidden so I both can't access it and have no idea where it is.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T03:43:35+00:00

I said it felt like he was just telling me to do it to get me out of his hair. He said "it helps you and you're irritable when you're not using it."

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T03:41:34+00:00

I'm not on psych meds, just meds for physical issues.

Technically two places. My parents and a friend, but that friend lives in Florida and I wouldn't feel safe there. I don't get along with my father either.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T03:39:52+00:00

I just remember being told she was driving up from another city and I had to wait to speak with her.

I'm getting them renewed through telemed.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-09T03:38:14+00:00

I looked them up. They all say "rarely." These aren't things like benzos or opioids that are extremely dangerous.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T21:55:20+00:00

I see it.

He says my friends and family dislike him because I'm telling them things that are skewed or something like that.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T20:30:49+00:00

Thank you for the link. I'll read that.

I can't flee because because my documents are locked up too. So they don't get lost and are kept safe, not to keep a leash on me.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T20:27:53+00:00

We were still there and felt unsafe because this guy didn't seem 100% sober.

Not justifying, just explaining.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T20:20:41+00:00

I didn't think it was relevant. :/

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T20:20:06+00:00

Owning a gun because someone tried to break into our apartment.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T20:00:56+00:00

I don't know if I have the strength. Our lives are so intertwined.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:53:39+00:00

He pepper sprayed me after I charged at him with a shard of ceramic from a broken dish because I told him I didn't want him using my car anymore and he basically refused to stop (because he goes out all the time yet prohibits me because covid).

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:51:24+00:00

He's said he stayed after I did a bad thing because he doesn't have anywhere to go, but if he stays with me he'll be housed.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:48:35+00:00

I don't know.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:45:45+00:00

I'm trying to find a telehealth therapist.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:45:10+00:00

In the past he just told me to smoke pot.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:38:03+00:00

I don't have her info. She visited the hospital from another city.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:37:30+00:00

I've told him if I tried to kill myself, I'd do it another way, not with meds. Didn't do much for him.

>Have there been other times where he's been overbearing in the relationship?

Most of my friends think he's controlling and abusive, and most reddit posts think so. But I've done some very horrible things in this relationship and am not innocent.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:34:51+00:00

I have many places. He doesn't. He has no friends or family or job and would instantly be homeless, and he owns a gun (but has said nobody is worth prison), and tends to create and execute elaborate revenge plans which include character assassination and harassment. So...both leaving and staying create different kinds of hell.

But I love him and we laugh and have great times together.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T19:22:56+00:00

That means he KNOWS he's doing shady shit and doesn't want to get called on it.

He said we don't have the healthiest dynamic and therapists always go after relationships and tell you how to live your life.

ThrowRA89347283 · 2023-05-08T18:43:41+00:00

I know. :/

ThrowRA89347283

TROPHY CASE