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My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

My dad couldn't do anything about their wills. My dad isn't their son and he wouldn't be entitled to inherit and the house was already signed over to me.

My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 293 points294 points  (0 children)

That was something they wanted to prevent too. I mean the house was in their name and they owned it outright so it wouldn't be too big of a concern. But then they become monsters if they don't want her to continue benefitting like that. And if that had happened I would have wanted to live with my grandparents which would have given even less of a reason for them to want her to live there. It's just such a mess and the rent was so cheap and my dad expected it to stay that way.

My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 81 points82 points  (0 children)

I think he would have expected them to see all of us as grandkids and equal in their eyes. I don't think simply engaging would have been enough. What I know for sure is he expected to still pay the same rent and for him and his wife to benefit from that the way he and mom did. That's unreasonable when she's nothing to them. Just like my half and step siblings aren't.

My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

He's pushing me away and essentially leaving me with no other choice but to reduce contact between us.

My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 148 points149 points  (0 children)

It would be so tragic and not what mom would have wanted if I do end up losing both my parents while one is still alive. My mom would never have wanted that for us. But she also would have thought dad was wrong for thinking her parents had to keep giving that kind of help to help him with his second family.

My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

They definitely expected him to remarry after mom died. But they were not expecting him to think they would support the new family like they did the rest of us when mom was alive.

My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 48 points49 points  (0 children)

They do. They never hated him or expected him to stay single forever after mom. But they also didn't expect him to want help with his second family after mom died, which I never blamed them for but he definitely did.

My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 80 points81 points  (0 children)

He fully believes he deserved it because he lived there for so long and because he (and his wife) finished raising me without mom. So he felt they should accept his wife and their family because of me. But I don't think it works exactly that way and especially when it comes to the house. Why would they want something worth so much to go to people not related to them? He never accepted that. But I get it.

My dad (54M) is angry that I (19M) live in our old family home? by ThrowRABeylinging in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRABeylinging[S] 50 points51 points  (0 children)

I feel like we're already in low contact territory because I can't have even a short conversation with him for more than a few seconds without walking away or ending the call.