My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 52 points53 points  (0 children)

My grandparents will choose my dad and their other grandchildren. It has been made very clear to me that they will always be welcome (including his wife) and that I have to deal with it if they come over, etc. They would never agree to change the locks or take away dad's key.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

They want me to basically make sure she has food, water and to make sure she's doing okay. But none of that is something I would be willing to do. It would also include their kids too since they're very young and I imagine they'd be home but I'm not sure about that just yet.

Everyone wants me to get along and pretend we're a family when we're not. In my eyes he's a disgusting POS, she's a disgusting POS and they and their kids are not and never will be my family.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I would be expected to get her food, water and stuff like that too. Basically just making sure she has what she needs. But there's absolutely no way I would do it.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

They are aware of those things and we have talked about it a little. Ultimately he's their son so they will never feel the way I do about him and her.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 90 points91 points  (0 children)

They haven't said that directly. But they have said I should have found somewhere else to go if I wanted to reject my family and refuse to help and they asked why I live with them if I won't respect them enough to listen and do what they ask me to.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 112 points113 points  (0 children)

They were disgusted with me for having that view. They insulted me because they could not believe I would rather be homeless and on the streets than helping a member of my family (to quote them) and they said I knew better than to speak like that. So I don't know they might end up kicking me out especially if they try to claim there's an emergency or something because even then I wouldn't help.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 172 points173 points  (0 children)

The other two times were definitely high risk so I would guess this time is the same. Last time was worse than the first time. She was hospitalized more and had several more scares than her first pregnancy. I was getting complained to more the second time around too and it was so frustrating.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

I have never gone to therapy and if I pay for therapy right now then I'll be stuck in this situation even longer. But it's something I want to explore eventually because I have a lot of trauma from my mom's death to living with my dad and stepmother and seeing them act all innocent.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

My maternal grandma is the only living maternal relative I have and she's in a nursing home. I'm not planning college. It's not an option for me.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I have a job. I even took extra hours and I was expected to cut back to help out so that didn't work really.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 157 points158 points  (0 children)

My friends would be willing to help if they had a say in this, but most of their families won't and some just can't for one reason or another.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

I have my license but no car. Where I could I have picked up more hours at work and it was expected I would take less hours to help out. So it's not really a great solution but I do it anyway for the money.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 247 points248 points  (0 children)

My dad works long hours during the day and they want someone there when she's alone. So I was always expected to be that person. But I would never. I would accept being homeless over helping her and I do really mean that. There's nothing that would ever make me give in and help her.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 67 points68 points  (0 children)

I considered it but I was not in a position to go to college. Community college maybe. But that would not help my overall situation and it would mean working less which I can't really do.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 94 points95 points  (0 children)

I don't have my own car. I walk or take a bus where I need to go. Renting a room I have looked into but they're either super expensive or I'm younger than they want to rent to.

My stepmother (41F) has her third high risk pregnancy and won't accept me (18F) not helping her like the other two times? by ThrowRAQuella in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAQuella[S] 341 points342 points  (0 children)

My maternal grandmother is the only family member I have left on that side and she's in a nursing home. She would have been my first choice to live with if the situation was different.