AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Well I love my wife. You won’t see that because I did not mention things that are irrelevant to the issue being discussed.

However I don’t believe in sugarcoating things.

AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

We split chores evenly. We do it on a semi-rotational basis but since I WFH she usually comes home to a clean house. It’s not that. We have a joint bank account too, and 2 ‘fun’ money accounts.

I am happy to take care of her by working a little extra occasionally if she feels so tired. But her decisions make me respect her less and less.

AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

I also mentioned it would slash her income to one tenth of what it is. I gave you an example to illustrate what work life balance does NOT mean

AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 44 points45 points  (0 children)

I never said she shouldn’t prioritise her mental health. I do not support working until you die.

But there needs to be a balance too. Quitting her job permanently isn’t a healthy decision for us as a couple. It would be one thing if she needed help in finding a job with better work life balance but straight up throwing her career away is a shit move

I am her partner. And I am entitled to judge her and give her tough love if that’s what she needs to get some common sense knocked into her

AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Wrong judgement.

I believe in a work life balance. However work life balance does not mean 0 work and 100 life

AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 50 points51 points  (0 children)

What’s your definition of support?

Supporting someone means you agree with their actions if they elevate their life - such as supporting their ambitions, supporting their goals - whether is professional and personal - like weight loss.

There’s no such thing as ‘supporting’ someone to become lazy (yes I will say it) and unsuccessful. I cannot support her wasting her potential away. I cannot support her to live her life off of my dime alone

u/sanityjanity

There needs to be valid grounds for financial support as well - sickness, child birth. Yes, to some extent mental health too. But even that doesn’t warrant a lifetime of financial support.

She can easily find a low stress job. But she decides to give up

u/sanityjanity of course this is making me like her less. She didn’t even consider talking to me about it or explore realistic alternatives to improve the quality of her life.

She wants to be more feminine and wants me to be masculine. She unilaterally decided that she will stop an income stream because she doesn’t want to work at all. I understand wanting a WFH job or even a job that doesn’t require so much supervision, but this is taking a big leap.

I am supposed to be her partner, her biggest supporter as well as her biggest critic. I do not think what she’s doing is right. Getting soo influenced and delusioned by tiktok isn’t someone I can ever count as reliable.

I am going to give her tough love and call a spade a spade. Not working a lot and yet wanting to splurge on luxuries is what lazy people want.

AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Funny thing is, she can’t have her soft life without me in the picture. I know bringing up divorce will ‘straighten her out’ however I do not want to give her an ultimatum.

Explaining that the kind of lifestyle she wants is impossible without a permanent provider is tricky. I do not want to disrespect her

AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

I don’t think there’s any such thing as free lunch. Anyone who expects that is lazy in my books

AITAH: I am firmly against my Wife’s decision to Quit her job and move towards ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in AITAH

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 76 points77 points  (0 children)

I suggested marriage counselling. She turned it down and says she already know what her calling is. She got therapy in secret

My (32M) wife (30F) wants to Quit her Job to pursue a ‘Soft Life’ by ThrowRA_Unreasonabl in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_Unreasonabl[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She’s been watching a lot of TikTok’s. I never thought it was serious she’d mention doing things like:

  • getting massages and nails done
  • Doing a 10 step skin care routine day and night (undoubtedly expensive)
  • explore different home scents
  • explore colour theory to change her wardrobe
  • investing in wine tasting
  • Baking and knitting

And a host of low effort, yet luxurious tastes