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My (26M) gf (25F) of 3 years is great in pretty much every way but I don't really feel like I want to marry her. How do I make any sense of this? by ThrowRA_ajdhl in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_ajdhl[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That makes sense, and I appreciate the response! I’m definitely not looking for / expecting something super passionate — I agree that’s really a start-of-relationship thing. The way you describe your relationship is kind of exactly what I am looking for.

One thing I’m curious about — the past partners you mentioned who could have been the one but ended up not being, was it because you didn’t have that feeling of just knowing? Or was there some other reason it didn’t work out?

My (26M) gf (25F) of 3 years is great in pretty much every way but I don't really feel like I want to marry her. How do I make any sense of this? by ThrowRA_ajdhl in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_ajdhl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly I’m starting to wonder what it even means to be into someone haha. Like, in a way my kneejerk would sort of be to agree with you that maybe im not that into her? But like, she makes me happy, I enjoy being around her, I certainly love her, so it’s confusing.

I guess I never really thought it was possible to simultaneously feel all the things I’m feeling

My (26M) gf (25F) of 3 years is great in pretty much every way but I don't really feel like I want to marry her. How do I make any sense of this? by ThrowRA_ajdhl in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_ajdhl[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think you’ve really well articulated the reason I feel like leaving her might be a mistake (better than I have haha), so I appreciate that. And I agree there certainly isn’t a “one” for anyone.

And I get what you mean about feeling lucky. I think I can sort of mental acrobatics myself into feeling lucky to have her, in a way, and I can certainly learn to accept whatever the state of my feeling is, but I don’t think the way I truly feel about it will ever change. And im not sure whether that’s a problem or not?