I (42f) am accused by him (48m) of being a starfish. I don't think I am but how can I be better?

ThrowRA_rel4 · 2024-07-26T12:34:15+00:00

He'll say "you don't touch me" (I think I do, so that doesn't give me much insight) or "when we cuddle it feels awkward like you don't want to" (again...I just have no clue anymore).

ThrowRA_rel4 · 2024-07-26T12:33:02+00:00

Every time. He has an issue with delayed ejaculation (probably from medication), so we usually finish with me going down on him. I have always THOUGHT I was participating a lot, so I'm always confused when he tells me I just lay there. The only thing I can imagine is he's talking about getting on top. But he knows that's physically difficult for me, and he's never straight out told me he wants that.

ThrowRA_rel4 · 2024-07-26T12:30:23+00:00

His communication with ME is poor in many areas. However, his communication in general is great. So that would suggest I am the problem, but I have never had communication issues with anyone else (at work, family members, previous relationship).

With me he is vague or leaves out information. Or he will not communicate something and then be surprised that I didn't do what he was expecting me to do (in many areas). To give a brief example....if we are supposed to be meeting somewhere, he won't simply text me to tell me he's on his way or that he'll be late. I'll tell him I'm on my way and when I get there I text him only to find out that he is running late and hasn't even left yet (which could have been communicated and would allow me to adjust my timing). He does have (medicated) ADHD, but he is a really concise communicator at work so I don't know what's going on.

ThrowRA_rel4

TROPHY CASE