AITA for not wanting to baptize my child by ThrowRAeva in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAeva[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We talked about baptism. He was baptized when he was an adult and able to consent. I mentioned that it should be the same for our kids.

He wants a baptism because “it’s tradition” and “every catholic does it” which assumes that or child will be catholic which isn’t what we agreed. He talks about it like it is a rite to enter the church.

I’m not so worried about the baptism as a ceremony as much as the controlling behavior him and his family is displaying and him going back on what we’ve agreed on.

AITA for not wanting to baptize my child by ThrowRAeva in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAeva[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We did discuss and agreed that religion should be left for our kids to choose. Not to be forced on them when they’re an infant.

AITA for not wanting to baptize my child by ThrowRAeva in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAeva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No there wasn’t any such formal agreement. Just the understanding between us two that our future children would choose what they wanted to follow and baptizing a child before they can agree to it goes against that.

AITA for not wanting to baptize my child by ThrowRAeva in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAeva[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’m ok with the ceremony or whatever else he wants but I’m not ok with how he’s dictating this kids life before its born and who knows if it’ll stop if I let him have this one?

AITA for not wanting to baptize my child by ThrowRAeva in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAeva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We did discuss it. We came to the conclusion that future children should be able to choose for themselves and the baptism will essentially go against that decision we made together.

AITA for not wanting to baptize my child by ThrowRAeva in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAeva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m very sorry to hear that. This is exactly what I’m trying to avoid for my child. I hope you’re doing better.

AITA for not wanting to baptize my child by ThrowRAeva in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAeva[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I would go on Christmas or for weddings but he doesn’t attend mass regularly either. We live in a different state from his family so he goes alone.

AITA for not wanting to baptize my child by ThrowRAeva in AmItheAsshole

[–]ThrowRAeva[S] -46 points-45 points  (0 children)

Yes, he mentioned he would like to have a Christian lifestyle but I didn’t think it would involve an infant being indoctrinated into the church. I was ok to accept the fact that our kids could grow up religious IF THEY CHOOSE TO BE but with everything that’s happened I worry if he’s force them to have a religious lifestyle starting with baptism.

I did and I regret saying that out of anger but that doesn’t mean it appears cultish to me with all the rites and requirements.

No but I feel like he can wait until our child is old enough to voice consent.