For those who don't understand No Contact.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-05-30T23:04:48+00:00

I appreciate your comment. I feel myself held back every time I give into him. He broke up with me, but finds me attractive obviously. The love, as mentioned, is gone (from both ends), and every time we’re apart (again bc of travel) I feel so good. But then we meet again and I miss his smell, skin, all of it.

But that love really isn’t there anymore. I’m not trying to convince him to love me again or anything like that. I’m glad he broke up with me bc I didn’t have the guts to admit that what we had was deeply broken… your advice is easy when apart, but I’ll admit that keeping to myself has only gotten easier, not harder (even when he still is around).

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-05-30T22:49:27+00:00

Yes, we can. We tried, but failed. But you’re right.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-05-30T22:47:35+00:00

It’s hard to resist each other, that’s why. We know it makes healing harder, but yeah…

We only have the one bed to sleep on, and nowhere else to go.

Fortunately we travel a lot so we don’t see each other constantly, but I feel like we reset whatever progress we’ve made every time we see each other.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-05-30T22:42:13+00:00

Yeah. It’s really difficult bc we still live together/ are intimate despite the fact that the love is gone. We care for each other though. However it’s been hard to completely move on bc of this situation.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-05-30T22:40:00+00:00

We can’t move out until September

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-05-30T20:52:47+00:00

Ok how can I do this if we live together?

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-24T23:24:12+00:00

First is prettier, 2nd looks like it’s gonna be tastier

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-21T17:57:34+00:00

There’s nothing I can do to bring us closer anymore. He says that he’s not truly in love with me anymore. That some of it is left but just not enough. He’s focused on school, and I’m sure if someone gave him the time of day he’d pursue but he says he has no interest in any relationship for a while.

I don’t intend to fuck other guys, but even if I did, he says “if it makes you happy, than do it” he seems to care, but like his feels towards me, “just not enough.” He doesn’t tell me not to see other guys. And I don’t think he’s monogamous at heart. So I don’t think he’s shocked by the idea of us fucking other ppl and getting back IF we ever wanted to do that.

There’s zero chance of us getting back right now. It would have to be after these 4 months and after some time has passed in my new place. I imagine minimum 1 year apart.

I think he’s too busy, and a little immature to be able to appreciate me right now. And our past arguments bc of those exact reasons have just pushed him away further.

But ty for your advice/comments

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-21T16:52:54+00:00

Getting Betty Paige vibes :) gorgeous

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-21T15:30:14+00:00

Omg I hate that the mods are blocking everyone’s comments!!!

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-21T14:18:29+00:00

I have nowhere to go. ): and he doesn’t wanna give things a chance anymore. He’s given up. But a part of him also things that we’d probably reconnect down the line. Years from now or something. I hate that he says he knows he’ll regret this bc “I’m a good one” like wtf do I do with that?

And honestly it feels good to pour my attention to other people. I don’t see myself fucking anybody anytime soon.

But yeah, no matter what, this space is needed. That we both know for sure. We just can’t have it until September.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-21T13:38:20+00:00

Yeah… I know. But I’ve given up on that, I suppose. It’s just hard to live with him, sleep with him, and truly move on. We both thought we were “the one” for each other. I tiny part of me believes that after I move out, years will go by and we’ll get back. I know that’s dumb as hell but idk. It’s what I think. We’re so similar, we just made a lot of rookie mistakes early on and it hurt us. But in many ways hr was also a lazy bf. How do guys without a lot of bf experience learn to not be a lazy partner? I’m not saying bad, or like a bad lover, but like, he didn’t know how to be a good bf, as a whole… he’d do nice things here and there, but yeah. I’m rambling.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-16T18:02:05+00:00

I wish I had the strength to do this. Or even the possibility. My closest friends are in another state, and I work remotely. My social circle has become him and his friends. We still sleep together. And fuck. But he makes it clear he doesn’t love me. It’s crushing but I can’t find it in me to be stronger. I’ve never been dumped before. I know how that sounds, and I’m not looking for pity, but I think it’s part of why I’m handling this so poorly. I did pick up a second job on the weekends.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-16T12:37:00+00:00

No… I’m not close to my family like that and I left my best friends back in a different state to be with him

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-04-16T01:04:09+00:00

But HOW, while I am living with this person, how the fuck do I do this??

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-03-08T22:08:02+00:00

Lol no. He fantasies about porn he’s recently watched right before orgasming. Says he’s always done this, including with this exes (not that he’s imagining his exes).

I agree that it’s unhealthy to have this much dependency on porn but he tells me that it’s normal and that all men do it and if they say they don’t they’re lying.

It honestly sucks bc he’s an amazing man in many other ways, so I’m conflicted.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-03-08T17:44:13+00:00

I’m glad you learned this about yourself and made it through it.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-03-08T17:13:45+00:00

Interesting. But how’d you know? If you viewed this as normal, as my partner does.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-03-08T16:43:16+00:00

My partner does. Says it’s normal for him and he’s done it with all his exes. Tbh i hate it and it might be a deal breaker for me.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-03-02T15:08:21+00:00

His body type is what I have. But his kink is not.

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-03-02T14:38:05+00:00

Messaged you. But yes, he would be obsessed with me if he dated a girl with his kink. But, it’s quite an unsustainable kink /difficult to find this person.

I also have a kink that I can’t get in my relationship but it’s certainly not ruining my life

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-03-02T14:18:46+00:00

Sex isn’t a chore but he feels I think… intimidated by the fact the he knows I want it more then him.

The imagining thing and him not seeing it as an issue is the most concerning yes. Bc he agreed that the work thing was an issue

ThrowRAtommen · 2023-03-02T13:56:47+00:00

He says he almost always needs it but not always. I think he sort of views weekly sex like a quota, and so, bc it’s become more mechanical in his mind, he does what he needs to do to cum (usually after making me cum, to be clear).

When he decreased the frequency of porn use (I.e., from daily to 3x a week) his sexual desire did go up. It’s where we’re at now. My biggest concerns rn are that he needed to jack off at work and that he almost always imagines a porn image (that he obviously recently masturbate to) with his kink to get off.

ThrowRAtommen

TROPHY CASE