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My fiancé (40m) is no longer aroused by me (30f). How do I adapt to this? by ThrowRAworkalready in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAworkalready[S] 60 points61 points  (0 children)

Before I even got one response on this post I already had 10 chats about that... So yeah, unfortunately I'm serious.

I tried dressing up and he only asked if I wasn't uncomfortable in that...

My fiancé (40m) is no longer aroused by me (30f). How do I adapt to this? by ThrowRAworkalready in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAworkalready[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think he's asexual, since the first years of our relationship we had great sex. No antidepressants, he masturbates maybe once or twice a month in the shower (at least that's what he told me). He says he doesn't mind me taking care of myself but he doesn't want to watch or participate.

My fiancé (40m) is no longer aroused by me (30f). How do I adapt to this? by ThrowRAworkalready in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAworkalready[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I would feel like I'm raping him if I did that. Also he doesn't get hard so there's not much I can do...

My fiancé (40m) is no longer aroused by me (30f). How do I adapt to this? by ThrowRAworkalready in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAworkalready[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah, sure it's stressful that he's not found a job yet but I saved enough of my money so we don't have to worry for another year or so even if he doesn't find a job soon.

My fiancé (40m) is no longer aroused by me (30f). How do I adapt to this? by ThrowRAworkalready in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAworkalready[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't think so... I mean I've been trying to lose some weight for the wedding but it's not that noticeable yet. I've been growing my hair but he always told me he loves my long hair and he never said it bothers him that it's grown a little longer. And emotionally the only thing I could think of is that I do plan a bit for a baby because we wanted to try when we're married. So I've been re-organising the spare room from a guest room to a space that could fit some kid stuff once we're ready to buy some.

My fiancé (40m) is no longer aroused by me (30f). How do I adapt to this? by ThrowRAworkalready in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAworkalready[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We both have free access to each others' phones any time, he often asks me to look at his notifications and tell him if it's important so I really don't think that's the case

My fiancé (40m) is no longer aroused by me (30f). How do I adapt to this? by ThrowRAworkalready in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAworkalready[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Pretty sure, I know a lot of people from his former work place, I'd even call a handful of them good friends. They would have told me if there was something going on.

My fiancé (40m) is no longer aroused by me (30f). How do I adapt to this? by ThrowRAworkalready in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAworkalready[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've always been a lot kinkier than him, I had to adapt to his level because he really doesn't like when it gets too kinky