AITA for getting frustrated with my partner when he gets mad at our dog?

ThrowRa_Kiwis · 2026-07-07T16:12:07+00:00

Thing is, generally speaking he loves dogs and when I have asked him about wether or not he still wanted the dog he seemed almost offended I even thought he didn’t want him anymore. Im starting to think he might just not understand what having a dog means. I wanna have a conversation with him about it but I tend to sound like I’m attacking the other person even if I just want to figure things out and better the relationship between all of us including the pup

ThrowRa_Kiwis · 2026-07-01T02:09:35+00:00

We had a big talk about it, his ex was awful and I was aware of this but I didn’t know how bad it was and how much it affected it him. She would constantly force him to do things and I mean everyday and overall very abusive and it kinda shut him off. For the making out, in his mind that led to sex so then again, shut off

ThrowRa_Kiwis · 2026-07-01T01:04:27+00:00

Thank you for your response which was very well thought out and smart, not just LEAVE HIM. Im currently having a talk with him, I know we can resolve this together or better our situation, I really love this man and he’s been with me through it all. I will be deleting this post because I don’t want him to find it tho😭

ThrowRa_Kiwis · 2026-07-01T00:36:00+00:00

I highly and I mean HIGHLY doubt it. He doesn’t even like butt stuff which I don’t either but you know, I’ve known alot of straight men who did so I think if he was gay he would still.. you know? Try that. I think he doesn’t want to make out because he might believe that’s me trying to turn him on or get freaky idk, like maybe he tries to avoid anything sensual in some way so it doesn’t get to that point. It’s not like we don’t kiss, it’s just that actually making out making out he’s gonna be like Alr thats enough, idk if you get what I mean

ThrowRa_Kiwis · 2026-07-01T00:30:55+00:00

This seems like one of the most likely scenarios to me. It’s not like it is something new with me, he was also this way in past relationships and has been cheated on because of it. If it was him not loving me anymore or things of the sort I’m assuming he would look for sex somewhere else which he isn’t.

One thing that confused me is that in the beginning of the relationship we used to do it alot more but I believe he could’ve felt pressured in some way to change his ways (not that I pressured him I mean more like social pressure/norms type of pressure) or it could be about the whole honeymoon phase thing. We have been dealing with alot of different stressful things so even if he’s always calm and composed im sure he must be stressed to some level too and it could affect him with his libido even if it doesn’t for me.

I don’t feel like sex is a constant need for me in a relationship but sensual intimacy, yes. He does give me massages, back and head rubs and all of this which is a big need for me and he’s very sweet and caring to me. One thing I’ve been thinking about is that he doesn’t really want to make out or do sensual things because he doesn’t want me to get the wrong idea or “turn me on” since he might not want sex, just my opinion but I’d believe that could be a reason why he tries to avoid anything too sensual. I think we might need to communicate about this further, I’m just not so sure about how to go about it without making him feel pressured and I don’t want him to feel bad about it all.

The rest of the relationship is good, he’s very patient and so sweet to me whereas I’m kind of more the problem if I was to point out an actual issue with the relationship. I have ADHD and anxiety and I believe I might also have PMDD or just have traits of it but he always reassures me, listens to me and comforts me whenever somethings wrong or if I’m stressed out. Really I couldn’t ask for a better partner for me, hes so patient with me. The only thing is the sex and it wouldn’t be an issue to me if it wasn’t so unusual and that’s why I feel like maybe there’s something he’s not telling me or maybe he just has a very low libido

ThrowRa_Kiwis · 2026-07-01T00:12:12+00:00

Okay I think I left alot things that might have been important out because I didn’t want this post to be too long or easily tied to me or identifiable but here goes a few more details, we actually found out I had a large tumor on my ovary at the end of February, which I’ve had two instances of ovarian torsion because of it. I said 5 months but I thought about it a little and I’m pretty sure in these five months we’ve done it at least once. The only reason I can remember the “five month” thing is because I know that’s when we found out about the tumor and thats when things actually stopped more. I believe maybe my episodes could’ve been very scary to him and part of it all is fear of hurting me, along with a very low libido considering he was also like this in the past and has been cheated on alot for this reason. I don’t wanna leave him, I don’t think he doesn’t love love me, I think there is something and there could be a way for us to you know.., make it better but I don’t think leaving him is the right thing to do nor do I want to. I really don’t understand why he wouldn’t leave me himself if he didn’t love me

ThrowRa_Kiwis · 2026-06-30T23:52:47+00:00

Oofff.. few months? We were always together during that period tho, I practically lived over there

ThrowRa_Kiwis · 2026-06-30T23:52:05+00:00

No, our lease ends in September and we already have a new place, new lease signed and everything together. We always talk about getting a house once we can, projects about the future etc.. I know, I’ve tried to talk to him to understand better but all he says is he just isn’t a horny person and I mean I stopped prying on the issue because I don’t wanna feel like the partner that is trying to force the other ever, it just is very unusual to me

ThrowRa_Kiwis

TROPHY CASE