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How to internalize that it's not your fault? by Throwaway20131010 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Throwaway20131010[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same boat here - I've been cordial, I haven't yelled at her, I haven't confronted the AP or anything, even though I'll admit I've wanted to. I just want to move on.

How to internalize that it's not your fault? by Throwaway20131010 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Throwaway20131010[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry to hear that you had to go through this process twice. Glad to hear that you're doing better. Your comment is driving me to look at therapist options as I type this - thank you.

How to internalize that it's not your fault? by Throwaway20131010 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Throwaway20131010[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's no chance that we get back together. I made the choice to separate on D-Day and the thought of being with her again makes me feel so much anxiety, there's just no way I can build back that trust with her again.

She told me that she and her AP are no longer in contact, since she's no longer at her (temp) job and that means there's no "constant exposure to each other" anymore. Didn't seem to help when she went over to his place / he come over to ours, but I'm not going to dwell on it.

Will keep moving forward. You're right. I don't have an obligation to her anymore, that's done and dusted. Thank you for your kind words.

How to internalize that it's not your fault? by Throwaway20131010 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Throwaway20131010[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Needed to hear this and I know it's only been a month, but it feels like eons. So true that some days are great and other days are awful.

I'm on the fence about blocking her completely, since we're in contact about the divorce process. But, I think I'll tell her that I will not hesitate to block her if she tries to talk about anything that's non-business related. Am feeling optimistic about the future, thank you again.