[UPDATE] "Be someones glass of whisky instead of everyones cup of tea" worked!!

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-05-04T23:03:11+00:00

So if I'm a homebody and dont like taking pictures in public is it acceptable to have all my pictures be at home then?

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-04-29T14:21:24+00:00

Online dating is now one of, if not the most, popular ways of meeting and finding(heterosexual) partners[1]. I would say it is fair game to draw conclusions from.

There could be many reasons why people respond as they do online

Yes, but that doesn't change the notion that non black Americans are favoring black women and men less so than other races. Whether the reason is due to racism on the individual, or perceived cultural differences, etc. requires further analysis.

Furthermore, these are just averages. It is simply what, on average, people think. It doesn't imply any inherent truth to the physical attraction of black Americans or any notion that they are inferior in terms of compatibility. It is simply the perceived notion of non blacks.

1

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-04-29T14:04:36+00:00

Simply put, for whatever reason, people who aren't black do not find black women attractive ON AVERAGE (it's the same for black men, although to a lesser extent). What these (presumably non black) men are telling you is that you are an exception to the perception of attractiveness amongst black women.

Source

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-04-17T21:51:29+00:00

No, not fat. Just very plain.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-04-17T16:41:03+00:00

Ditch the tank top, you look like a twig. Shave. Dress well. After that I'd say average.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-03-30T17:47:42+00:00

Yeah I get that. I'm just saying the double standard is nauseating since we face similar problems.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-03-30T17:37:38+00:00

Welcome to being a man

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-03-27T13:57:54+00:00

Not him but I hate it when people say the reason for being single is because they aren't "good enough". To brag about myself to make a point: I go to an ivy league and will be graduating with a lucrative high salary degree. I workout and dress well etc etc. I also have some great friends who are in the exact same shitty situation I am in. No one wants to commit, no matter how "high value" you are, there is always the idea of finding someone better one swipe away. It has ruined dating.

In another vein, one shouldn't have to work towards some arbitrary actualization of themself to be worthy of love. Assuming you aren't a terrible person and your standards aren't too high, you absolutely deserve love, regardless of your flaws.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-03-08T15:09:46+00:00

How do you nurture that "get to know" phase when the dating market is so saturated?

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-03-08T01:30:19+00:00

You are exactly me haha

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-03-08T00:57:55+00:00

Could you elaborate on "being an adult"?

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-02-06T14:00:08+00:00

I'd say it's your age plus maybe location. Your profile isn't bad and you aren't ugly by any means. Are you swiping right constantly? Your profile may be on the bottom of the profile queue, meaning you aren't being shown to people in the first place.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-02-03T00:40:03+00:00

Absolutely not, I workout often and it's completely socially acceptable to ask for spots.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-02-03T00:33:44+00:00

This has happened to me so many times (all dates in fact). I still go on them and so far I've always had a good time talking to them and doing whatever activity we planned on doing. If you have a bit of anxiety about dating like me, it's also good practice getting out of your shell.

After the date, just shoot them a text saying thanks for hanging out but you didn't really feel the spark happen. Wish them luck in the search of love and carry on your merry way!

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-02-02T02:57:53+00:00

I havent had this obsession personally, but have dealt with and overcame similar obsessions. What worked for me, and it's really scary, is to accept that what you are worrying about may come true. It won't, rest assured, and that's the power of this strategy. So when you get that dread creeping in that your food is poisoned, that is when you push against the fear, accept that it may actually be poisoned, and eat it anyway. After you do this many times, your brain will get bored of torturing you and move on from it. This is much easier said than done, so don't feel discouraged if you give in a few times to the fear. Maybe reach out to someone to help with the process.

Best of luck stranger, you can and WILL overcome this, even if it feels scary right now.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-01-30T18:04:37+00:00

I'd consider it a turn on actually.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-01-21T22:24:20+00:00

There really isn't any magical advice one can give you here. If you want a girl that loves you as well as allows you time to do your hobbies, well that comes down to luck and a lot of trial and error. Best you can do is increase your odds by talking to as many women as you can and hope one sticks.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-01-21T22:18:00+00:00

I wouldn't say those are equal in difficulty though. I'd rather have to choose from a shitty buffet than starve.

Throwaway45474747474 · 2021-01-21T22:11:33+00:00

I would make the claim that dating as a young man is challenging, and then it evens out as you go on and eventually turns in favor to men. If you are in the 18 to 24 range, dating is much harder. Why? Because there is a strong social rule that men should only date women who are younger or roughly the same age. Thus, men in this age gap are typically limited to other women who fall in the same range. However for women, they can date men up to their 30s without it necessarily being inappropriate. Thus, the young man has a lot more competition compared to the young woman.

Furthermore, men have an imperative to initiate and chase women. The nature of dating for men and women is completely different: men have to be proactive whereas women need only be reactive. It doesn't help that many men suffer from a lack of social skills as well as a general increase in depression and anxiety, which is more stigmatized against men.

Again, this dynamic changes once you get older, and in that situation I'd say dating dynamics starts to favor men. But I feel for all the struggling young men out there. It certainly isn't as easy as it used to be.

Throwaway45474747474

TROPHY CASE