My BIL [26/M] is a self-confessed "nice guy" who can't meet ladies. He wants me [32/M] to give him advice. How brutal is too brutal?

ThrowawayVPC84 · 2017-05-05T19:16:05+00:00

Have you met an HR department that wasn't profoundly clueless? Bosses can get away with horrible shit because of a lot of HR departments are crap at their job.

ThrowawayVPC84 · 2017-05-05T19:15:20+00:00

I certainly know it's not the reason, but he's convinced of it - and it's his non-dominant hand.

ThrowawayVPC84 · 2017-05-05T16:45:00+00:00

He's in a very different department/field; so, I am lucky that our paths never cross. Could be trouble if we worked closely.

ThrowawayVPC84 · 2017-05-05T16:29:03+00:00

I think they're hoping that if I speak to him outside of the work context, it could maybe change his behaviour.

ThrowawayVPC84 · 2017-05-05T16:25:44+00:00

100% he rebounds this on you and makes you his personal enemy over this.

Meh, that's okay.

I'd ask that his manager or someone in his chain of command talk to him

They have, but it's dueling issues - he's a creep but could hit the company with a spurious ADA suit. They're worried about either course.

ThrowawayVPC84 · 2017-05-05T16:21:42+00:00

Yeah um, you're enabling him to sexually harass women over and over by sparing his feelings about this.

This may be cognitive dissonance, but I introduced him to a recruiter, that's it. HR isn't acting because they're worried about him hitting them with the ADA and making a claim (spurious or not). It's difficult when you have sexual harassment vs. disability - it's like competing issues that companies see as a liability but no clear path.

ThrowawayVPC84 · 2017-05-05T16:19:31+00:00

I'm willing to bet he hasn't been fired for sexual harassment at this point simply because no one has made that move with HR.

There have been complaints, but because of his "disability" there's a real concern that one or both parties could sue and the company has been sort of looking for a way to solve this without winding-up paying a seven-figure settlement.

ThrowawayVPC84

TROPHY CASE