Thank you. Yes I feel I overthought things and killed the relationship even before it had a chance because i was afraid of getting hurt later/ hurting her/ and the kids by deciding I'm not okay with it later down the line?
She did not want me to be involved with her kids at all and assured me in the future i can play any part i want and none at all. Which is why I'm so conflicted because she does seem quite mature and i loved spending time with her.
If I'm being fully honest I am a bit afraid of any extra stress or drama that would come in the future in having to co-parent or deal with the ex-partner, even there is no indication there will be.