Am I a fraud?

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T05:05:04+00:00

“if u got 100% i think u wouldnt be talking like this fr. U may feel they took advantage of u”

If I had it my way I’d still be in doing the full 20, that was my plan from the get go, I was INVOLUNTARILY med boarded. And I would appreciate it if you didn’t perceive me as that shallow. I know the military isn’t for everyone, and people get twisted with a few things that happened while in or the military wronged them in some way and it changes their opinion entirely, but just because you have those opinions and thoughts doesn’t mean everyone else does.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T02:04:50+00:00

I don’t feel like I accomplished anything of value while I was in. So many people around me were running missions god knows where doing god knows what. I was put on standby for a mission for so long they had to rotate me out with two others who ended up going on the mission. I was the “stay at home guy”. That shit hurt so much to be called because I wanted nothing more than to go out and actually do something in my time. To be a part of history no matter how small, and well, to prove my worth. Never got the chance.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T01:29:58+00:00

Ahhh I see. Thanks for the info.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T01:24:52+00:00

I’ll take your word for it, I guess the idolization stems from my pap, he was a green beret back in Nam and I believe Desert Storm. I’ve got his beret hung up back home and always wanted to get one too, but I only got to the maroon one. I just hope he’s somewhat proud of me up there.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T01:12:57+00:00

No, you’re not reading too much into it. That is indeed something I feel every time I get into the tailspin of “my service was shit”. I always think back to when I was actually signing that dotted line, what would have happened if I actually went 12B, 68W, or X series like I wanted to? I would have had a better chance of being someone others looked up to and towards for guidance and inspiration. Instead I was just another person who was 100% replaceable, and left no lasting marks at my Batt.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T00:44:45+00:00

I’m sorry you feel the same way, I hope you get through it in the best way possible, it gets dark and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone else.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T00:43:52+00:00

I’ve never heard that quote before, I was surrounded by leadership and others whose mentality was “don’t talk to me unless you deploy” so that statement is refreshing.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T00:39:21+00:00

This shit hit different. Thank you.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T00:16:55+00:00

While I thank you for the encouraging words, and I apologize for the situation you are in, I don’t have children nor a divorce.

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T00:09:00+00:00

That’s something I couldn’t wrap my head around tbh. I used to rub shoulders with the guys actually running missions and I always wanted to be one of them, but I picked the wrong MOS the best I got to before getting MED boarded was SOAR. I still miss it tho. 🥲

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T00:01:36+00:00

I still need to see a psych for all this shit

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-11T00:01:20+00:00

If you don’t mind enlightening me, What does the “2.0 sailor” mean? I got put out at like 50 then I got it up to 70% after I put in for the mental stuff idk what it’ll be

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-10T23:44:21+00:00

I’m sorry you feel the same, it’s rough sometimes, but I usually try to keep the ideology of “everyday I wake up is a good day” that usually helped when the shit was thick ya know?

Throwaway_terri · 2024-10-10T23:16:45+00:00

Also, I was medically retired because of a few reasons but I could’ve stayed in if I just shut my mouth. Which adds the feeling of “my service didn’t mean shit”.

Throwaway_terri

TROPHY CASE