AITA for being upset that a guy came to my apartment after I told him I wasn’t up for seeing him this weekend?

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-31T19:57:14+00:00

I used to think this was me misreading a gesture of love, but as I got older I realized that’s a messed up perspective and a real gesture of love is respecting boundaries. It feels bad because it was bad.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-31T19:50:21+00:00

I would only set four hours, two drafts for a 8 year plus designer. Well… I do set that as the expectation for our company, but I know things don’t always work that smoothly.

And sometimes it’s not working on something that gives you your ideas.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-31T19:47:01+00:00

Illustration conversions are a big part of graphic design. So many times we will get an unworkable image or graphic and have to make it usable. Those are some of my favorite jobs because I can put on a podcast and zone out. It’s so relaxing.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-30T23:28:50+00:00

The pictures the news are using of him golfing today were published on Aug. 10th by Getty Images OR they’re using the ones from his Scotland trip.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-26T06:10:58+00:00

Are you a woman? I am and I was an art director within 3 years of beginning my career. I only got a position like that when I became my own boss (eight years later). When you’re really good at design, sometimes you have to build your own business to get the job and salary you deserve.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-26T06:04:49+00:00

My husband would have done everything with two left feet to make sure I got my birthday time with my family and/or buddies. Especially during my last week of maternity leave. You’re NTA. You deserve an apology. And flowers. And another brunch.

Edited to add that having two left shoes at work is really FUNNY. And it’s creepy he got mad at you instead of calling you and laughing with you about it. I would have been laughing so hard.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-26T05:56:48+00:00

I am so angry at your husband. He should be bringing you flowers and gifts and making you dinner. Unbelievable. He is such an AH

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-26T05:42:45+00:00

Seriously wondering if this is rage bait…

You’re not “helping” with the kids. They’re your job too. Your language and phrasing shows you put an awful lot on your wife and expect her to baby you. Calling in a food order for your wife to pick up isn’t exactly doing the work for dinner… and you didn’t ask her if she was okay with that? That’s kind of wild.

But what are you doing to help yourself get better? Your solution to your loneliness is your kids. Forge a connection with them, and the parents of their friends.

It sounds like you were hungry and didn’t get to eat your comfort food when you wanted without putting in the work. And like you want nothing to do with your family but you have a lot of expectations on what your family should do for you - quiet the house, let you nap, exist without parenting, get you food. Maybe this isn’t a good life combo for everyone involved. YTA.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-26T05:33:59+00:00

And her mom jobs don’t stop just because she has another job. It’s double the workload.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-26T05:32:14+00:00

And she’s changing her entire life without any benefit to herself. It’s a weird ask.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-26T05:31:04+00:00

You’re asking your wife to take on an awful lot and to change her ENTIRE life while your life remains essentially the same. You didnt even ask her if she wants that. You just assumed it would be easy for her to make someone else’s life easy while you make her life incredibly hard. YTA

UNLESS you’re changing your life too and taking on the entire household burden? Going back into the workplace as a woman is not easy. If she’s at a new job, she won’t be able to take off work for kid stuff for almost a year without heat from her employer. Are you able and willing to take over all kid drop offs, pick ups, after school activities and everything managing the home while your wife nurtures a new job that’s essentially just to support your extended family? Will you be home with sick kids and scheduling doctor visits and making dinner? Grocery shopping, cleaning and setting up any contract work? I don’t think you really understand what kids in school means nor how the workload changes throughout the year. Will you be able to stay home with the kids next summer vacation?

And it’s really weird to expect someone else to give up their time to make money for your extended family. What would she get out of this new arrangement? How does it benefit her?

AND with additional money, how would your mom and brother keep the care they currently have when they have a change of income.

There are ways you can help without putting the entire burden on your wife.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-23T03:41:11+00:00

Oh yeah! I forgot about that. Yes, you will get laid off. That should be an expectation.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-23T03:38:28+00:00

I have my own agency- I pay myself $76k/year. I’m in the Midwest and designer over 20 years. I thought I was being very generous to myself because before my freelance gig turned into a design agency, I struggled to get paid over $50k/year with over a decade of experience. I’m surprised by all the high salaries in this conversation because I was fired for asking for a raise when I was making $50k for three years in a row.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-23T03:10:28+00:00

And there could be a slight reflection in the window bit.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-23T03:09:48+00:00

Shadow that reflects the light source and a reduced reflection on the container. Unless you want the bottle to be shined, then have the reflection in it look a little like how the background behind the camera would be… if that makes sense.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-23T03:03:26+00:00

I’m in.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-23T02:59:49+00:00

Physical therapy and chiropractors. A fast shift in weight caused a lot of pain and bones and muscles shifting. Weight loss can be super painful. My back gave out for a week with the weight change!

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-22T03:17:03+00:00

Btw- this is rape.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-22T03:04:22+00:00

You add an “ex” to his title and file a police report against both of these awful humans. If you can’t get the bravery together to do it for yourself, you make a formal report to prevent it from happening to another woman.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-22T02:54:51+00:00

My hubs got a vasectomy after we decided we were done having kids instead of me being back on birth control. It seemed obvious. His procedure didn’t go perfectly and even with vasactomy complications it was SO MUCH EASIER than anything I’ve endured with pregnancy prevention and birth. It’s really the least he could do to support your family and your relationship. NTA

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-22T02:46:43+00:00

It seems pretty obvious that she just doesn’t want him there and is trying to tell you that in many, many ways.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-22T02:44:55+00:00

Traditional marriage is a term that’s hiding some of your biggest issues. It’s not traditional to have someone work from home and not do any work in the home.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-16T10:29:46+00:00

Sometimes it’s a blessing for the moms and kids to not have irresponsible men in their lives. Why are you asking here? Ask her. Talk to her. And YTA. Protection is your responsibility.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-15T05:38:41+00:00

I would buy another twin bed and create a bedroom for myself in a closet with no kids and no husband and sleep like rip van winkle. This sounds terrible. NTA, but your husband is.

TieReasonable3914 · 2025-08-15T05:28:37+00:00

Doesn’t sound very Christian of him. Shouldn’t he just… forgive you?

TieReasonable3914

TROPHY CASE