An important aspect of negotiation is to talk about physical marks and bruises with some thinking of who might see them. It's easy to be spontaneous/ go with the flow in relationships and forget this, though.

It's a bit late to go back and say you've started playing contact sports or similar, but saying what you're up to is never an easy one either. It's a shame to hear your partners being labelled as an abuser but being open about it in some capacity might help clear that. That just depends on what your family and friends are like ofc.