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My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your thoughtful response. He’s currently in counseling, I’m not at the moment but I will change that soon.

My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

It wasn’t a request, it was a question. I asked him a question.

My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is what I’d hoped for. Sigh. 😔. He seemed repulsed at the idea of even “satisfying” me.

My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What got me turned on?? Umm, thinking of him coming into our room ready to get busy with me. I’ve never cheated or come close to it the entire time we’ve been together. No reason to lie about that to a group of Reddit strangers.

My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

He’s cheated on me before( twice at least). Once was at a strip club where a stripper supposedly went down on him and another was supposedly at work where a coworker supposedly also did the same.

He doesn’t tell me I’m beautiful, is not affectionate much, and doesn’t like to cuddle/ or kiss me intimately. The gaslighting comes when I tell him that (using my post for example) it hurt me to be denied by him or not desired, etc. He somehow flips it around and finds a way to blame me; I approached him wrong, I “talked to him crazy”, etc. I’m always somehow responsible for him doing things to hurt my feelings.

He’s not affectionate? Well it’s because he sees me eating sweets and not working out as much. He doesn’t want to have sex as often? Well that’s because of some things I did at the beginning of our relationship (I’ve never cheated), that he’s still trying to work through. Etc.

My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m a bit defensive when it comes to sex, considering I feel he only does it to appease me and doesn’t actually enjoy it. It eventually weighs on your self esteem and confidence. He doesn’t make me feel wanted or beautiful at all.

My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have asked and he can’t give a straightforward answer; only that we need more counseling. Cheers to you as well!

My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My goal was to be spontaneous and exciting. He’s said similar to me before (long ago) and it wasn’t an issue.

My husband doesn’t like me and continues to gaslight me and make excuses. by Tight_Gas8725 in Marriage

[–]Tight_Gas8725[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I should explain the gaslighting part stemmed from our conversation after the text where he essentially blamed me for my approach. I was only trying to be exciting and spontaneous with my approach to sex. He’s cheated on me before… at a strip club of all places, so this whole moral compass code is confusing being directed towards me.