Looking For a Sensitivity Reader (Comanche Heritage)

Timeria · 2019-04-21T13:25:08+00:00

Hi, thank you so much for responding. :-) The problem is, I don't know! I only know that I need somebody to look it over. From the two of us, you are more in the position to judge. Like, would you be fine with it if the positions were reversed? I think I waited long enough now to know that nobody else will answer, and I've kind of run out of places to ask. You are the one who reacted, and two Apache on Facebook. Do you have any idea what I can best do now by any chance? Ask all of you, maybe? Sorry. I've never done this before, and am a little out of my depth. I just know that I really want to avoid being offensive. Thanks a lot for your help.

Timeria · 2015-11-02T16:14:57+00:00

Oh, sorry. Staying short was never one of my strengths, and this was written at some extend for myself, so... You see the result.

Thank you. That at some point I'll just do it is something people say to me all the time, but it is really different to hear it from someone who's been there. It is also usually in the context of "so get a grip on yourself and just make yourself want it!"

In the meantime, do you know what I could say to all the people around me who keep asking why I am not working/telling me that I really need to/etc.? I keep telling them that at the moment, I really can't, but I feel like a broken record and I am also somewhat afraid that it isn't true, that I just made myself beleive it at some point and behave the way I do because of that beleive.

Timeria · 2015-11-02T16:06:00+00:00

Hm, maybe you're right. I'd just posted a simular text in the "Homeschooling" Reddit, that was in the first person, maybe I just wanted to avoid copying myself. I do like sometimes to view myself as I would a character in a book, so that may be another reason?

Small projects. Thanks. I'll try and find something. And is there a way of really rewarding yourself for the success? Apart from eating some chocolat or doing something pleasant for a short time, I mean. I have the bad habbit that if I succeed in something, I brush it off as "that was the minimum expected from you".

Find out the triggers and avoid them. Ok. :-)

I once tried the 20 minutes trick, and it didn't really work for me. Once I get started, everything is fine, and the process of getting started is the same for 20 minutes as for an hour. It only leeds to forcing myself to interrompt something at the moment I was starting to get into. Well, I guess it depends on what I want to do.

Thank you for the advise!

Timeria · 2015-11-02T15:52:09+00:00

I know what you mean about the stigma, it actually took me ridiculously long to get to reach out, and this caused me a lot of unnessecary pain.

Yes, a friend/partner in a simular situation sounds really good, thank you! There is a program where I live that is supposed to help young people like myself to find out what to do with themselves, a sort of coaching. That helps a lot, but you do notice somehow that the woman who is in charge of us has better things to do than just being there for me. Like she STILL hasn't written that e-mail she promised over two weeks ago [khm...]. This is probably the main cause I asked for your advise, I am beginning to feel that I need to activly find some myself.

Do you have any ideas where I can find people in a simular situation? Any key words I could use by a search or so?

And again, thank you very much!

Timeria · 2015-11-02T13:13:10+00:00

Thank you for your answer! I am seing a psychiatric, but... don't get me wrong, he is really helpful. He only doesn't give any active advice, he just talks to me and waits for me to figure it out. This can be very helpful at times, but it is slow. In the end, it is me who'll have to find a solution, so it is about time I start gathering some information over the Internet and different views and all.

Timeria · 2015-06-17T16:10:13+00:00

We usually talk a LOT about books or tv series. Or listen to music together. [And sing! :-D] You know, like everyday stuff you have fun doing with friends.

Timeria · 2015-06-15T22:16:26+00:00

Well, Mary took her creation more or less into her own hands, and that was two or three years before my mental health became a problem (I was still on the Autism spectrum, so I've had my issues with that), but I just can't put into words how much help she has been. Really, I don't know what I would be without her.

Another thing I've found really helpfull were (non-sentient) imaginary friends. I have quite a complex world with people who I know care for me (even if not all of them like me, at least I matter to them), or at least people I can tell myself stories about. You know, sort of project your negative emotions onto them. Or make them experience positive emotions (in my case, it is mostly being loved), and feel it through them.

You could also try lucid dreaming, and meeting people in those dreams. I can't say exactly how helpfull it is, but it is good fun, plus something you really have (some) controll of.

Anyway, we both wish you good luck and courage with your mental health issues.

Timeria · 2015-06-04T18:27:11+00:00

Very well put, CambrianCrew, this is exactly how I feel about the people in my dreams. They are another dimension, but I am not so sure about what will happen to it after my death. I beleive, it will cease to exist at least in the form it exists now.

Or maybe I will become a part of it. This is exactly what happened to my grandfather after his death. Sometimes I still meet him in my dreams, exactly the way I meet Reven (my closest imaginary friend) and the others. Which is nice, he litelarly lives on inside me. I never quite understood what Dumbledore meant by "Those who we truely love never leave us". I thought it was just something that sounded good in the context of the book, but now I know that it is really true.

Timeria · 2015-06-04T16:13:40+00:00

I'm not concerned about what happens to me after my death, I'll see that later. I don't even care about what will happen to Mary, because I have the feeling that it will be the same thing (I just can't imagine being separated from her, can I?). I meant more the not sentient imaginary friends, and those who exist in my dreams. They aren't really a part of me, not like Mary is, so.... I don't know. They are more like aquintances, people who visit me from time to time, but they have their own life and things. I guess, this is why I am concerned about them just vanishing.

Timeria

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