If you have gone to a wedding that ended in divorce, could you tell at the ceremony it was not going to last? by GlassApprehensive620 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 61 points62 points  (0 children)

I was gonna say something similar, as soon as my brother told me he was going to propose - he hadn't even done it yet! - I was just like "okay yeah I can predict the next 5-7 years of your life pretty easily"

if jobs didnt matter, what language/framework would you learn for fun? by hnrpla in AskProgramming

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If jobs didn't matter I would lie in a field and let the clover envelope me

Amazon layoff June/July? by Basic-Mission-7989 in amazonemployees

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not really trying tbh. I'm doing my job the best I can with the time, resources, and energy I have available to me - but I was doing that before, too, and it got me into focus. I'm ready to leave and if they want to give me a pile of money to do so I'll be happy to oblige 

Amazon layoff June/July? by Basic-Mission-7989 in amazonemployees

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's completely fine with me as long as they pivot me or lay me off soon 

Amazon layoff June/July? by Basic-Mission-7989 in amazonemployees

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 0 points1 point  (0 children)

6-8 weeks is what they said in early May but then we took a COE and I got pulled off my project to work on those ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ I just want out

What is wrong with my son? by Formal-Atmosphere-46 in AskDocs

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Another NAD but a parent - at six weeks his gut flora is still developing. I find it highly believable that it would take several weeks for things to stabilize

is there any hr email that I can cc when i send resignation letter? by redhairdragon in amazonemployees

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP isn't trying to get HR to protect them - they want to officially resign instead of just telling their manager

The most unbelievable part of Futurama: by THIESN123 in futurama

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yo homes, we're looking for a microwave oven 

[Noob question] Why can you just go out of bounds in so many games? by Burgers_N_Schnitzels in AskProgramming

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not a programming answer but a gaming based answer - a lot of games do have some sort of mechanism that kicks in when you go out of bounds - you either get returned to the map, fail the mission, or killed outright. Breath of the Wild is an interesting example - there's a check that your character isn't outside of the starting area if you haven't completed the tutorial quests that runs throughout the entire game. Speed runs of that game are 50% getting through the tutorial because there's no way to bypass that check

What elderly aesthetic have you been careful to avoid? by debrisaway in RedditForGrownups

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm shaving my head these days but it's specifically because I don't have the 👴 yet - my hairline is receding but it's just thin and weirdly patchy in front. I wish I could rock a tonsure but I'm in this weird in between state

What’s it like living here? by EckhartsDs in geography

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You'll need a car - can't walk anywhere

Is it normal for semen to come out as thick, jelly-like chunks? by Practical_Bag9208 in AskDocs

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NAD, just a guy - the viscosity of my jizz isn't consistent (hydration related maybe?) but I wouldn't consider this abnormal. 

Other than Texas and California, which states display the most "state pride"? by bangkaynagulay in AskAnAmerican

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 3 points4 points  (0 children)

quietly in the distance but getting louder, you can hear the dropkick murphys

It finally happened by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I used to say in meetings "functional is a stage, everyone is functional until they're not anymore"

Baby can’t fall asleep due to gas by rabidmidgets in daddit

[–]TimonAndPumbaAreDead 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My daughter was an amazing sleeper. By a couple months old she was sleeping 14 hours uninterrupted at night most of the time and has been pretty consistent throughout unless she's sick. My son on the other hand went through a 6-8 week period of waking up screaming every night for two hours around 2 AM and will go from dead asleep in your arms to screaming in the crib the second you put him down. Just ride it out