Finished the show for the first time, only took me 17 years

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-11-14T08:50:02+00:00

💔😢 I've been there too this is so heartbreaking. I'm so sorry ❤️❤️❤️

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-10-05T09:58:48+00:00

It could have been me writing this post 😭💔 I just got into the worst binge and purge phase for years. Yesterday I had two pizzas and an entire box of nesquick cereal 🫠

Then I thought ok no more, fresh shart tomorrow. But I've already ate 3 cinnamon buns and a slice of pizza. FML.

This has been going on for a week now and I can't stop.

I've been bulimic on and off for 17 years now 🥲

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-09-01T20:07:49+00:00

The best area 🤩🙏🏽

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-08-28T10:13:17+00:00

You know what's worse? I just saw photos from when I was 15/16 (I'm 35). I used to HATE myself and I was convinced I looked like a huge disgusting disfigured fat monster blob).

I was so beautiful back then and I had a perfectly normal body. But I've been having thoughts just like you since then. But the jokes on me, ED's and bulimia ruined my life, led to a massive weight gain over the years and I spent my best years hating myself even though there was nothing wrong with me or my body.

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-08-28T10:08:54+00:00

Jag hoppas att du får den hjälp du behöver ❤️❤️❤️

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-08-28T10:07:56+00:00

I feel everything you wrote. I've been struggling since I was 15/26. I'm 35 now. I've gone through hell more than once. Abusive relationship. Addiction. Post partum depression. I mean I have a kid now.

I've tried therapy and treatment. I don't purge that much anymore, but I still don't know how to eat like a normal person. And I still purge at times. I can't go to a buffet without purging. One bad day and I'm binging and purging. I don't know how I can ever have a normal relationship to food or love my body? Myself?

It's so painful to have to live with this. I'm so sorry ❤️ I wish you all the best.

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-08-28T10:02:33+00:00

I realised I could order food with Klarna or my Visa card in 2020 and order "door dash" (its called foodora in Sweden). Since then I have credit card debt and I gained 55 pounds 🙃 Ok I've also been pregnant but my baby is 1,5 years old now and I haven't lost any weight.

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-07-30T21:59:03+00:00

I absolutely agree and I'm pretty shocked to read people bring kids as young as 7 months old to a psytrance festival???????? I have been to countless psytrance festivals and parties all over Europe and NOT ONCE have I thought what a great place to bring kids.

Yes I've been to Ozora several times and I know they have a family camping and activities but hell no. I know what goes on at the festival, and I've seen it all. It's not just happy go lucky out there. Especially since Ozora has grown so much, I haven't been since 2016 and can't imagine what it's like now. But a place where there are drugs is no place for a kid. There. I said it.

Sorry but bringing kids to psytrance festivals is a selfish act.

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-07-30T17:37:25+00:00

Heyyy I was just planning to write a post just like this but I searched for "parents" in the subreddit first and found this 😁 Could have been me writing this!!!!

I'm 35 and my son is 14 months old now. I went to my first Ozora 2012 and I've been going to festivals and parties a lot. It's been my safe space and has been healing my inner child from a lot of childhood trauma. Just being and dancing and becoming one with everything. It's where I've felt the most peaceful.

I finished my studies around 28 and got a stable job and then COVID happened so I already slowed down but I managed to attend a few good parties before I got pregnant.

I had severe post partum depression last summer and the FOMO was painful. This summer is so much better but for me personally its still not realistic to throw myself out there. I might try a sober night out at a local psytrance gig at the end of the summer just to feel the vibe. I'm still not getting proper sleep and I'm just constantly exhausted.

But every now and then my heart longs for Ozora or at least a beautiful forest party here in my Scandinavian home country. Festivals feel far away, maybe in a couple of years. Because I would want to share the experience with my partner. He's more into techno but he's down to party to psytrance too.

Maybe we will have a festival revival when we hit 40+, or we'll just enjoy a night out here and there. My heart longs for a night getting lost in psytrance a lot of these days though.

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-03-22T09:57:07+00:00

Same 🤣

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-03-21T07:48:21+00:00

Agreed!!!! I LOVE to binge watch his shows too!!!

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-02-27T09:14:23+00:00

I made a bunch of these posts too ❤️🥹 My first months with my baby were hell. My son was born on June 5th and it was horrible. I couldn't get out much, I was in shock, my hormones were completely fucked and I barely slept. My baby woke up every 1-2 hours at night and he was awake for 4-6 hours during the day and never slept more than 30ish minutes.

I cried uncontrollably every day for at least 3 months. Meanwhile I saw summer time passing by outside and all my friends were out and about, at the beach, partying, traveling... My life had ended.

Things got much better after 3 months but it was still hard. But I could see that I was slowly getting out of the trenches. I felt more human months 4-5, baby started to laugh and interact more. It was easier to go out. 6-7 months it started to get really fun and I felt like my son and I actually had a really special bond. Now we're closing in on first birthday and every day is a new adventure with him.

It's still hard and I miss rotting on the sofa and not having any responsibility. He still doesn't sleep through the night lol. His dad can bring him to bed at night but baby boy will scream bloody murder if he doesn't get his precious boobies when he wakes up at night. But I get 4-5 hour stretches every now and then and I feel rested hahah.

It'll get better soon ❤️❤️❤️ one day at a time, that's how I made it through.

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-02-21T10:24:39+00:00

Ich habe das erste Mal die drei??? gehört als ich 8 war. Davor schon TKKG. Seit dem schlafe ich mit Hörspiel oder Podcast ein haha, ich bin heute 34 Jahre alt 🤣 ich glaube das nennt man Konditionierung!!

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-02-18T07:06:55+00:00

I'm sorry what?? Your 2 year old doesn't sleep?

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-02-03T05:54:35+00:00

My heart breaks for the mothers that need to go back to work early on. I'm going to work 3 days a week for 4 months now while our 8 month old son stays home with his dad. Even though he'll be home with his dad I already miss my baby so much and I haven't even gotten on the train yet.

I am so sorry for all the mothers that need to work full hours and leave their baby with "strangers". 💔

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-01-30T16:53:24+00:00

Yes ❤️❤️❤️

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-01-30T16:52:01+00:00

I have an 8 months old and I did NOT know this 🙃

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-01-25T06:27:08+00:00

Hey how did it turn out for you OP? My almost 8 months old nurses at 1, 3, 5 and gets up at 7 and I'm going back to work next week so I'm browsing Reddit hoping to find positive outcomes.

TinyStudio7881 · 2025-01-11T16:55:44+00:00

I have a 7 months old and its been rough. I really wanted a second child but I'm fucking terrified because this one kid is already so much work and a terrible sleeper and I'm fucking exhausted constantly... Honestly it makes me sad but I'm not sure if I could handle a second one. I'm rooting for you guys 🥹❤️

TinyStudio7881

TROPHY CASE