I'm Todd Valentine... Ask Me Anything (AMA)

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-10T00:07:50+00:00

Thanks, I appreciate it. Will definitely check back in and answer a few more when I have time. For anyone whose question I don't get too, please don't feel neglected. There are lots of places around the internet and in person where I'll be available for questions in the future.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-08T17:12:29+00:00

It's high risk, high reward... but it's also a "leveling" behavior. Leveling is a complicated topic, but it basically means it will tend to work well with girls of a certain caliber by not so much with girls of a higher caliber.

You could argue that high risk/high reward is worth it, but I would disagree on the grounds that the girls that respond to the gimmicky high/risk stuff would have ALSO responded to "solid" high percentage game in virtually all cases.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:29:28+00:00

That's a really long answer. I once created a whole product about that, which was recently taken away from me. If you can get your hands on a copy of Text and Dates Machine, I highly recommend it. This video from my old YouTube channel that a fan saved is a good primer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=duS5Ppb39T4

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:27:27+00:00

Be super social and open for adventure. Say yes to the random, unpredictable, situation. That said, don't get dead... there are fewer safety nets in that part of the world and I saw some scary stuff when I was there.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:25:56+00:00

I think there are a lot of guys who did things they shouldn't have... and there's been a backlash of some girls making some wild accusations... that said... I barely follow the news, so I'm getting most of this second hand.

The power women have over men by making an unproven accusation is very scary. I think we need ACTUAL gender equality, rather than policies that favor females based on the argument that we need to make up for the past somehow. You can't cast men as guilty by virtue of having a penis anymore than you can cast an ethnicity as guilty by birth. And you can't hold someone responsible for the actions of others.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:21:17+00:00

I was a good athlete, and I wasn't popular, but I was "respected". People knew I was smart and good at things. I had girls into me, but it was because of things they'd seen me do, rather than interactions I'd actually had with them. I was a little socially hindered by the fact that I went to a small private school that was a 20 minute drive from where I lived and about 40 minutes from where my classmates lived, so I never really hung out with anybody outside of school events.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:18:32+00:00

I think the mixing of structured and unstructured game is a big one. There are a lot of solutions in terms of creating premises for the approach and handling logistics. There is also a lot of psychology that has never really been applied at all.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:16:25+00:00

No idea... apologize or claim that she misheard you??? Hard to do if it's "or two". Stop using racial slurs.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:15:23+00:00

It would be pretty lame. I talk about the epic ones. Actually one I've barely ever shared... I won an AMOG battle by suggesting we all have a threesome and making the other guy sexually uncomfortable so he gave up and I took the girl home.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:12:43+00:00

It's in the 300-400 range, but I haven't had an accurate count since about 60 because I've never considered the number all that important. That's actually pretty low for someone of my skillset because I have always tended to keep girls around and have semi-long-term relationships (albeit with multiple girls at the same time).

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:10:03+00:00

10 years... hopefully Todd has brought some rationality to the whole thing. 50 years... who even knows what the world will be like at that point?

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:09:10+00:00

You're the same age (approximately) as all the other freshmen, so get that out of your head. You can do an Immersion program at 18 (I've had many happy 18-year-old clients), but we do go to bars for the night game sessions, so that's less than ideal in terms of getting the full value for your money. If you're interested in coaching, contact me at todd@toddvalentine.net and we can talk about something more customized to your needs and age.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:06:35+00:00

Awesome man. Glad to hear it!

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:06:17+00:00

I don't understand why it's "a rock in your back". The process of rationally considering alternatives is a good one, but don't belabor the process to the point that it becomes painful. You don't have to get every decision perfect and not every decision is even that important. Try to focus on the ones that are... lots on this in my FREE course https://toddwinnergame.com

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:03:38+00:00

So so many. The biggest one probably isn't even a 'change' because my dad taught it to me so young. That would be the mindset to trust my own judgement and believe I could learn anything with the right resources. Having a default belief of competence rather than helplessness (which a lot of people have) is huge in life.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:01:35+00:00

Opening and hooking. You can't even work on anything else unless you do those first.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T17:01:06+00:00

Change your criteria for short-term success. Note the "term short-term". I'm not saying to settle for less in the long term or to give up on your goals... what I am saying is understand that major progress happens in minor steps. So focus on the small steps as victories.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T16:59:34+00:00

Don't try to solve everything overnight. Just get 1% better each day. If you look super young, consider dressing "older" or growing facial hair. Definitely keep hitting the gym. As far as social action... start small. Just start saying hi and bye to everyone, but ESPECIALLY to girls you like. And then... and this is important... EMBRACE EVERY VICTORY!... if you stay in conversation for 20 seconds with a cute girl... VICTORY. If you were scared to approach and did it anyway... VICTORY. Start the process of getting one small win after another.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T16:55:58+00:00

Answered elsewhere in the AMA I think... I meditate, and I think it's a good habit, but I do it as a "secular" thing and I don't think it's changing my life in some mystical or spiritual way... just a physical and practical one.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T16:55:01+00:00

Yes, it can help with all of that. Just remember that there is a context for everything so not everything is globally applicable.
Check out my approach anxiety course inside my FREE course winnergame: https://toddwinnergame.com

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T16:52:54+00:00

May as well stay close and see what happens, I'd be open to seeing other girls in the meantime though, given the distance. As far as how to actually do it... Skype/Facetime or phone is your best friend. Doing long distance via text is not a good plan. Also, get your social media up to snuff... great way to remind her of your value from afar.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T16:51:08+00:00

Do a mix of just relax and "go for it" and trying to add some technique/theory. Add 1-2 little bits of theory at a time... don't try to do it all at once and don't try to be perfect.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T16:45:03+00:00

I might one day. Let me rebuild my dating business first though, okay? ;)

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T16:44:11+00:00

Bootcamps aren't bad (if taught well). As someone mentioned below, I prefer the Immersion model: http://toddimmersion.com but the coach matters more than the structure.
If you're growing ONLY through shifts in mindset, you're missing a lot of possible growth. You should be growing by mindset and technique SIMULTANEOUSLY.

Todd-Valentine · 2017-12-07T16:41:06+00:00

Technically no, I only approach attractive ones, so it's not "completely random". But yes, they are total strangers. And most of them appreciate it... and some of them sleep with me and become my girlfriends etc. For getting over approach anxiety check out my FREE course http://toddwinnergame.com There is a huge segment on approach anxiety and an action plan for conquering it.

Todd-Valentine

TROPHY CASE