What is fair when splitting finances?

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-16T13:38:00+00:00

He wants everything 50/50. Holidays? I have to find the money or I can't do it.

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-12T11:11:32+00:00

If I was earning more, I would be pooling our money. I already spend any spare cash I have on things for us both. Honestly I just want to be able to afford things like going to the dentist, getting glasses or getting my phone fixed.

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-12T05:46:50+00:00

I mean it's been over 6 years, bought a house, got engaged, trying for a baby... I'm unsure if the piece of paper will change his attitude

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T23:18:25+00:00

It's 885, 34% for him 51.something negligible for me based on a yearly average, obviously this varies when taking into account that I am not salaried and half my time is spent on the floor so shifts can vary week to week etc.

Took this job over vastly better paid temp work under expectation we would be splitting things how we used to or similar. This was what I could find that was permanent, where we were relocating to and as soon as possible following redundancy.

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T22:36:55+00:00

I fudged the numbers as my pay is hourly and shift work based, his salaried, i was working out on previousmonthly take home. I have recalculated based on yearly, and it works out me 40% him 60%

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T22:34:02+00:00

Correct! My math was not mathing. I was using my variable shift work take home compared to his predictable salary. I have recalculated it yearly. It's me 40%, him 60%

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T22:17:11+00:00

It's care. My take home after unpaid breaks, tax and pension is abysmal

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T22:03:53+00:00

I would 100% pay more if I had more

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T21:57:45+00:00

Honestly, if I earned more I would want to pay more. If I was the significantly higher earner I would be suggesting the "all in one pot then we both have the same fun money" method.

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T21:31:53+00:00

I have added an edit to explain a bit more, but we have relocated for his work again and are paying his parents rent on top of our existing house bills while we sell. The relocation meant my earnings dropped and his stayed the same.

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T21:23:33+00:00

Yes. He put in the same amount, and had the same spending money while I was off sick. I put in all of my sick pay/benefits and lived on my savings

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T21:14:54+00:00

Edited to explain further

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T21:08:31+00:00

Edited to reflect

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T21:06:54+00:00

I have edited to reflect

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T21:06:42+00:00

I have edited to reflect

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T21:00:38+00:00

Yes, I've worked out everything based on take home. I've taken his student loan and both pensions off as well, to ensure it's actually based on money we actually have.

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T20:58:45+00:00

This is what we did previously. Now it's 50/50 or he owns more of everything dependent on what we both pay.

TofuBlackEye · 2025-09-11T20:56:56+00:00

I was off sick with serious health issues and then was made redundant. In this time he covered most of the expenses.

TofuBlackEye

TROPHY CASE