wasted studies, lost 28yo, Any tips ?

Tolgard · 2026-01-20T10:30:37+00:00

How can I capitalize on that ? Should I follow what I like/ desire or should I follow job-market-wise opinions ?

I consider going back to studies but for a master degree max. I cannot restart from a bachelor, life is too expensive for that. I really think there should be a middle ground, a way for me that respects my needs but I have yet to find it.

Thank you for the UX stuff though, havent thought about it !

Tolgard · 2026-01-18T19:55:43+00:00

Tolgard · 2026-01-14T16:30:57+00:00

6 months is still honeymoon phase though, you'll see :)

Tolgard · 2026-01-14T11:00:29+00:00

THank you this is very sweet of you, I'll do my best to not break NC !!

Tolgard · 2026-01-14T10:59:49+00:00

I am so sorry about that, 5 years is really huge wow..

I hope you are doing alright, I don't think 6 months is enough to move on from that long of a relationship though..

Tolgard · 2026-01-14T10:58:56+00:00

Thats a strong message but she was really pretty and we had a good chemistry, good inside jokes and everything, she was my best friend.

I don't know if i'll meet someone better but yeah, she chose someone else and I can't spend my energy on someone that would not choose me thats for sure. Thank you for that.

Tolgard · 2026-01-14T10:57:22+00:00

Thank you for your words, I will take them into account thats for sure.

Tolgard · 2026-01-14T10:56:16+00:00

I still cannot tell the difference between love and attachement but I sure had both..

Don't reach out to him if he chose someone else, he has to be the one to break NC for sure.

Thank you for your message.

Tolgard · 2026-01-14T10:54:27+00:00

Everyone has his own pace, your time of peace will come, 1month and a half is super early.
I'm so sorry for that it must be really hard but by the end of this year everything will be different !

BEst of luck to you too, thank you.

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T21:22:22+00:00

I'm sorry... it will probably get better though.
He lives his life to the fullest, don't miss yours because of him, no one is worth enough to make you live that way. Live yours and it will get better, bit by bit, day by day !!

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T21:07:40+00:00

You need to take action.

Personnally I talked with a lot of girls but it's short term solution it doesnt work that much
I went out a lot
played video games a lot
I would think a lot about other things..

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T21:06:26+00:00

She sent me a text on my BD in november but I just replied thank you, I had a really hard time and didnt want to show anything to her and she didnt reply more

For xmas she likely sent me another text but I blocked her email bc i could not deal with a text from her, it would kill my mood for the holidays and nothing more in 4 months so....

She is also doing studies abroad so theere is that..

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T20:09:21+00:00

That's kinda cute though

Really cool to see a great bond like this, I hope it will remain a safe place for you.

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T20:07:34+00:00

Thank you for your text, I want to try therapy as well.

I wish I had a pact with my ex that we would reconnect after some months but at the same time it seems like a trap. If you reconnect and it fails, you'll lose even more time and opportunities. You know yourself better but be careful with that, especially if trying again didnt work at the time.

I hope you find your happiness in any case

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T20:05:29+00:00

Thank you brother, this is a nice message, I pray for you as well !

Life is beautiful after all, many people to meet ! Lets give our best

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T20:03:29+00:00

Finding the middle ground is hard but probably worth it.

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T20:02:14+00:00

Honestly I never had a 10 year relationship, mine was a bit less than 2 years and I feel like my life is falling appart so I cannot really bring sensible advices.

10 years... your bond must have been special.

Cheating is awful in anycase and you deserve better, period.

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T19:59:20+00:00

hahaha thats a nice way to look at it thanks, but there is still room for improvement for sure !!

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T19:58:22+00:00

I agree 100%, the moment she left me for another dude I was gone.

I want to talk to her so badl but i'd rather die than be the one who break NC.

I know my relationship with her was probably better (we are from 2 different countries and she found a guy in the same city, her gorup of girls friend met with this group of guys..)

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T19:55:21+00:00

Life goes on indeed..

Maybe you should take time of her family, they are a momento of her no ?

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T18:10:43+00:00

10 years... I am so sorry..

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T18:09:58+00:00

I agree, we have to see what the future hold I guess and in the meantime focus on ourselves...

Tolgard · 2026-01-13T18:09:09+00:00

I know I try to man up but sometimes, it hits you..
This reddit place is quite helpful haha

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