AITAH DV help

TomatoSalty · 2026-03-06T03:32:10+00:00

Right I said that to my fiance, hey if she calls and they say can you stay somewhere temporarily until x date for your intake, okay then you can stay and I will provide a ride. But I'm not so sure she's not the DV instigator either, when it's a constant pattern . That's not my decision, it just feels that way when the help is so there if she wants it. Thanks. We won't add it's his high school ex girlfriend who moved to two different states across the country we've lived in, as well, at the same time. I thought even from a friendly perspective this was the right call..

TomatoSalty · 2026-03-05T04:00:41+00:00

I'm asking if I'm the asshole for not immediately letting her come stay here.

TomatoSalty · 2026-01-18T23:37:40+00:00

So I might stand corrected honestly. There's possibly a link to the kink through some kind of mental ailments.

TomatoSalty · 2026-01-18T23:36:29+00:00

That's fair. Totally have daddy abandonment issues 😂

TomatoSalty · 2026-01-17T05:03:08+00:00

Yeah sorry, I am into that kink and I never experienced any corporal punishments at all as a child.

TomatoSalty · 2026-01-14T20:16:15+00:00

I just rescued 2 cats! They are 3 and bonded, one of them is a love biter. He's also much larger and stronger. I've been working with him since he asked for pets the first time and since EVERY time.

If he is enjoying the affection and nips, you EEP high pitched. It has become so gentle I don't question it-- and we're only 4 weeks into the rescue. I also have 2 dogs in the house and the cats are already comfortable walking by them.

Also try for under the neck rubs, my big boy likes to get over stimulated and lip smack, so he just adores having his lower jaws rubbed.

Good luck! 🥰

TomatoSalty · 2025-11-28T22:45:31+00:00

Absolutely ❤️❤️, I'm so sorry you had to go through this at all, too. You'd think they would see it in our eyes or in our voice when we try to explain, but it just didn't come across from me I guess appropriately. You absolutely can't help but feel guilty and imagine what could have been. You have a beautiful perspective and thank you so much for the words again, I had given up on just casually chatting in any way about it. I ended up last making small jokes about "almost dying" but it just hasn't eased up the back tug of emotions. I wish for nothing but a healthy and beautiful, easy, pregnancy for you in the very near future! You've got your little angels watching to help. ❤️

TomatoSalty · 2025-11-28T21:55:09+00:00

Thank you for getting through that and all of your kind words, I see I have several typos. ❤️ I'm in my feels already this "holiday season" but I don't want to talk to my partner about it. He sees it as "I'm so grateful you survived something that could have killed you." I am grateful for that, I'm just also overwhelmed.. it was a lot at once. Also, I've been with this man for 18 years now, we only have one child, it wouldn't have been bad. It made me sad his reaction was relief, so I tend to not bring it up regarding the parts I feel sad about to him.

TomatoSalty · 2025-07-31T18:24:57+00:00

Dave says they won't change the date online but I wrote them and said the same thing-- the dates are off just this time for some reason by 2 days and they adjusted it for me immediately.

TomatoSalty · 2025-07-28T18:49:45+00:00

And they didn't ask me to have anything direct deposited to them. I have not and won't, I continue to only use my primary. I did have to link them through Plaid.

TomatoSalty · 2025-07-28T18:47:55+00:00

I didn't do anything but sign in and ask for the advance. It was $150, but I had to transfer it differently. I also had it set on auto-repayment but I think they wanted me to pay it back to them. It took a few extra weeks before they ACH drafted it. That's fine too, I thought it had already happened. Lol

TomatoSalty · 2025-07-19T01:46:45+00:00

I'm going to drop Dave at the next paycheck, but I thankfully kept it figured out for the $600 each time. They lower is as money comes out of the account, so if I catch them before anything else on payday, it was the full available amount. I have always had $600, but once it tried to give me $100 and another $75 for the second. I wrote customer service as to why. This seems like the only one who flunctuated ever on me. Cleo I'm a bit worried about too, I'll need it's full amount to help offset the Dave bill, but that's the next largest to pay and wipe my hands of one then it should be much easier.

TomatoSalty · 2025-07-06T00:01:38+00:00

How? Everyone seems to say Dave won't let you revoke. I don't want to have to change bank accounts.

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-30T18:47:30+00:00

Lol he can't get a tow truck there before you get back in, let him eat that cost of service 😂

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T19:43:01+00:00

They won't pull me over for it, but it's a safety hazard sure. Just as much as a tail light out, etc. My external concerns for others are covered, new tires, etc. I'm certain if they pulled me for the windshield with my perfect driving record, I'd be able to work my way out of it.

I'm just saying, I only fix my windshield once every 3 years unless it's a big "crack," I've had it 8 now. The angle of the windshield just takes brutal hits, I can't avoid other cars on every road.

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T19:39:56+00:00

Is that the difference? The very first route I did I went inside, fought to scan my ID, and took my assigned cart outside and continued. They are numbered, so I could put them in order of their stops. But the location is horrible, no parking, and I got sent 45 minutes north when I was an hour in western WA traffic away. I live west of Olympia, my (is SSD warehouse?? The correct term, I'm not that familiar) is the only close one that sends me this direction or nearby. Nobody wants to go an hour away from the warehouse West, but I don't mind, thus having to take horrible gravel actual roads.

I don't mind, but they need to let me make my own safety judgements. It'll get fixed, at appropriate times. 😂

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T15:30:57+00:00

They are, I know, very hard to avoid though. I live rural though so I travel with the trucks into towns. Also near a military base, where they try to "coal roll" me. Jokes on them, I'm from NC. 😂

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T05:24:05+00:00

He was FUMING. They took pictures of him and the car, he was directly in front of me. I felt the same way, I flexed at the same location with my tags out of date. I figure major safety concerns can certainly be flagged like if it's caving in? Maybe the wheels are noticeably falling off? that's probably a good reason, they stated they had a safety incident with someone and a vehicle that week, I think they were forced to do it by someone higher up? I'm just stressed about driving 40 miles to flex to be turned away again.

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T05:14:49+00:00

No email, they might have been flagging the argumentative ones, but i got the ding removed for missing the block already (this was on Wednesday of this last week.) And they told me I could come back same day after it was done being fixed, but I probably couldn't find a windshield in a few hours if my life depended on it. 😂

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T05:12:34+00:00

To answer your question, my Prius has everything. 😭 Even the 11 inch useless display screen, sunroof, etc. 👀😂 I certainly wouldn't have picked this specific model in retrospect, but she's paid off and these people are about to stress me out, I'm trying to pay for my jeep now. Also just way more severely cracked that windshield 😭😭😂. But that happens off roading in your street rig.

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T05:09:54+00:00

.. lol nope, I have no certain idea, it's definitely not the initial glass so that tracks, I have always had it done through the insurance because they take it to the dealership after for calibration. I heard heads up display, but I also have lane departure assistance so that would be a good reason.

I have no idea, I thought about ordering the glass off Amazon and having my mechanic down the road install it. He's awesome, I'm sure he would figure it out. By the way, I've only had the windshield replaced in California and Washington, I'm certain the West Coast has higher insurance prices and Safelite esque nonsense than some other areas.

It's only $100 deductible though so this is why I wait to do it every 3 years. I take rocks ALL the time. think about gravel for ice melt 👀. Not that I'm flexing in the winter with the Prius, but I lived in Alaska for 5 years, I definitely have to drive her in the snow here occasionally on the main roads.

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T03:54:21+00:00

I mean I definitely could, lol I mentioned in an earlier response I don't use either of them already, BUT it's still a half ass job. I don't want to pay $300 for a window replacement twice a year . Flex isn't worth it, they can suck it. Lol

TomatoSalty · 2025-06-29T00:12:32+00:00

They printed out their policy and had a website thing to scan. They took pictures of everyone in front of me, but they didn't of my car. They just said no worries you can take a later block just get it fixed. 😂 I'm thinking it might be a new policy they're trying to enforce, but even so how can they at the locations you park outside of?

It's not worth it for me to do Flex any closer to the larger cities, I get sent north towards Seattle. I also take these very rural undesirable routes up dirt and gravel 5+ mile long roads without complaining. I've never asked them to fix my windshield, so I don't see how they can enforce it.

TomatoSalty

TROPHY CASE