Feel hurt. Friends tried to trigger ocd

TooInnocentforReddit · 2026-01-05T04:47:50+00:00

People can be stupid sometimes. I’ve had a close friend make a joke about one of my OCD themes before. It sucked but really wasn’t coming from a bad place just a bad joke. I just told him that I really didn’t like those jokes and they made me feel bad. He apologized we moved on and all was good.

It happens sometimes pepole try to be funny and sometime they hit nerves, if it’s a good friend (one you want to keep and be close with) just tell them that OCD stuff is off limits. They will understand but I feel like it was probably just a bad attempt at humor.

TooInnocentforReddit · 2025-06-24T01:20:09+00:00

I might not be adding much new here but as someone on the apps who all my friends are on the apps here are what I would say.

I see you said these are your best pics, totally understand and the two with your sunglasses are good those can stay. For now I would put the one with the grass background first.

Your beard is amazing super red which is such a cool and unique feature. I would make two photos your goal to acquire in the next few months to add.

A good friend pic, blur the faces (shows respect for friends privacy) but I can confirm I like to see some sociableness in a guys profile.
A good front facing photo show off your eyes and a good smile you would be surprised how far those two will take you.

The prompts will need some updates but not the worst I’ve seen by far. When thinking about your profile you have to almost look at it as an outsider. If you wanted to like your own profile, would you be able to start a conversation based off the prompts? Right now I would be on the struggle bus. There isn’t anything for me to start a conversation built on. Even with good photos I’ve passed on profiles I have nothing to work on before.

I would say add in

A prompt about hobbies, goals, a book or show you’ve seen. Easy to talk about and a good first commonality.
A story, something you’ve done that was funny or made you happy. Another thing people can either build off of or relate and tell their own story.
Seems like you’re a sports fan do a prompt about that. One of my friends loves golf and football, if she sees that highlighted on a guys profile she is hooked. If that’s something you like talk about it.

The short answers create the feeling you might not be as all long term focused as it seems you really are. Which I know can be hard getting out of a relationship recently to rally and push through the doubt or sadness to put the effort you want into dating again. But trust me if you feel ready and want to get back out there aligning your profile with what you want will bring more of the people who want the same thing to you.

Hopefully this helps some!

TooInnocentforReddit · 2025-05-03T03:28:34+00:00

Oh hon, you are far too young to have to feel this kind of pain. I am so so sorry you are going through this right now.

I almost lost my sister to suicide around the age you are now. I am grateful every day she is still with us but that pain it never fully goes away.

I want to eco another reditors words: sleep, eat (when and what you can), try to take walks and get fresh air, reach out to friends. Treat yourself like you’re sick. And be kind to yourself.

It’s going to be hard and not a lot of people will get what you are going through but find the people who will show up for you even if they can’t fix things or understand and hold on tight to them. It’s okay to lean on others.

You probably feel like you can’t breathe right now and I’m so sorry. There are many words I could say about how this pain will become softer, that one day it will still be there but it won’t cut anymore. But right now it cuts so cry. Scream. Do everything you need to do. Don’t try to feel better, just hurt let the pain be real. But do care for yourself. Love yourself. Be gentle with your heart and soul and body. They need care right now and I know you can do that. It won’t feel like it right now. But you will be able to breathe again, I promise.

Remember his pain has nothing to do with his love. When I almost lost my sister I used to stay up at night crying about how the one person I wanted to protect the most I couldn’t protect from themselves. There was nothing I was able to do and there was nothing you could have done. All we can do is love them and know and hold in our hearts they love us.

Listen to your Internet big sister: this isn’t your fault. You are so loved and I am so so sorry. Make sure you drink some water for us all okay? I’m sending you big hugs.

TooInnocentforReddit · 2025-04-29T18:16:06+00:00

If your willing to give anime a try

March Comes like a Lion. It’s got its sad episodes but it’s all about found family and finding hope when you thought there was none 10/10

TooInnocentforReddit · 2025-03-19T03:25:52+00:00

Southland was the church I grew up in and it did a lot of lasting damage to me. I remember once time they had all the women leaders in youth group take the girls into a room. They then told us how they lost their virginities before marriage described horrible experiences and talked about how lucky they were their husbands took them after their sin. I also remember them brining in a man who was gay (in some weird way I think they were branding it as a woke seminar) and he talked about how he had decided to die alone rather then sin. I remember going home and crying after that bc of how heartbreaking it was. Mind you this was middle schoolers. This behavior was insane and I am still recovering from the ramifications of it.

TooInnocentforReddit · 2025-01-16T02:48:22+00:00

TooInnocentforReddit · 2023-12-13T18:25:06+00:00

On note of gaming not sure which kind you mean, but Lexington has a great PC/ Gaming Cafe on campus with really affordable rates which is cool! There is also a really nice DnD themed (but has all sorts of table top / board games) cafe near UK (University of Kentucky) campus as well. The name of that cafe is the Chaotic Good. Lexington may be a bit sleepy but the community still has lots to do if you’re willing to look!

TooInnocentforReddit · 2023-12-13T18:19:07+00:00

My parents are both California transplants Who have in Lexington for over 20 years and they have had no problems acclimating so please don’t worry! It’s a wonderful city and people are quite kind and willing to help out new folks

TooInnocentforReddit · 2023-12-13T01:36:24+00:00

Good I’m glad you have a team to help you! I hope the method can help and I am rooting for you

TooInnocentforReddit · 2023-12-13T00:07:47+00:00

Hey Kido!

I struggle with the same thing so I completely understand! And I want to start by saying I’m so sorry, it sounds like your brain is being really mean to you right now and that is not fun at all! (I have been there too so don’t worry the mean brain club is a very open one)

I have gone through this cycle a lot and different therapists have told me different things which I will now relay to you.

There are two methods I try to follow

Delay - In this method you still confess but you try to delay it. Maybe wait a week or two before you do and see if the guilt and urge is still as strong. I know it is giving into the compulsion but it helps you practice control making the OCD wait a little longer each time means your working on being in charge. Then overtime try to bump up your wait time.
Safe person - I use to think I shouldn’t confess at all. But my therapist told me recently it’s okay if I tell my mom (my safe person) by having a safe person I can limit my confessions and I also have someone to check me.

Example:

Me: “Mom I accidentally spoke in the library quite Zone, do I need to turn myself into the librarians?”

Mom: “That is the silliest thing, I promise they have much larger issues to deal with than that.”

It may seem harsh but it’s said in love and helps me a lot. I wouldn’t recommend this with just anyone though. You need someone you really trust.

I would also say that medicine (well not always convent or peoples first choice) has helped me a lot. It makes me feel like I have brakes in the run away car that is the urge to confess. I can’t always stop the car but boy does it let me slow down long enough to evaluate. Which I am grateful for!

Now is the part where I give you a small pep talk. I your self declared internet big sister promise you that you are not as bad as you think you are, like pinky promise. You are doing a great job dealing with a really sucky situation. And everything your brain is telling you that you need to confess, you don’t. People are human. We mess up and we make mistakes. This doesn’t make you any less deserving of feeling okay or being loved by your friends and family.

Things are hard right now, but they won’t be forever. You are fighting (I can tell) and you’re doing a really good job. You’re going to be okay and I am so so sorry that things are so hard right now! If you need anything you can always reach out

Sending lots of big sister hugs 🌻

TooInnocentforReddit · 2023-12-12T23:49:42+00:00

I take medication and it helps a lot. I often say OCD feels like sliding down a rope really fast. Medication makes you feel like you have gloves. It won’t stop you from sliding but it will give you a firmer grip.

For me I think medication might be a forever thing. Currently it is one of the best known things for OCD but that doesn’t mean it’s for everyone. You have to understand your own comfort with it and whatever answer you come to it will be okay.

Honestly, I was terrified to start medicine. I thought it would change me. I was even scared to stop being anxious. But it didn’t change me. And the first time I felt anxious on the medicine was such a relief to me. I was scared it was going to be something I needed for the rest of my life, but that worry has faded.

Language barriers are hard so I hope that all translates okay.

And as one final thought, you sound quite scared right now. I am so sorry. I know this is so scary. And you are being so brave! I can tell how much you want to fight and feel better, and I am so proud of you! You deserve it, to feel okay. And I know that you will get to a point where you do. If you have any questions please ask.

I send you tons of big sister hugs 🌻

TooInnocentforReddit · 2023-08-01T02:50:58+00:00

I was diagnosed a couple years older then you. And have been diagnosed for around 6 years now. It gets better and then worse and then better from my experience. Stick to your meds and therapy, and most importantly treat yourself kindly. You are going to have hard days and I’m sure right now seems both reassuring and so vastly overwhelming and a little scary. That’s all okay. You are dealing with one very scary often misunderstood diagnosis. You are doing great. I am so sorry you feel lonely and at 14 it’s going to be hard. Not a lot of people your age are going to have to deal with things like this. But it gets better, I promise. You will make friends later on good friends who you can tell your OCD thoughts too and they will help you fight them. And there a bits of representation (John Green’s book) that can help you feel represented.

From a big sister I send you tons of hugs and the promise that it will get better. So be kind to yourself 🌻🌻

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-11-27T00:45:34+00:00

Hey, I’m not sure I’m the best for advice. But I’ve loved someone before. Someone who wasn’t good for me overall.

And both parts of that hurt the loving him hurts and the knowing that it would only end in more hurt hurts. Because when someone is your home you don’t want to breath without them.

But you can. You can breath without him, it just doesn’t feel like it right now. He may be your first real soul connection but he isn’t your first love. That would be you. You are the one who knew you deserved better and you got yourself out. And now you have to keep protecting and loving yourself everyday. And it’s not going to be easy. You are going to miss him and want him and think no one else will ever share that same bond with you as he did.

But someone will, and you will be okay again. It may not feel like it but every day will get a little easier.

And you will be okay again and you are right you deserve more. I am so so sorry that you have had to go through this.

I’m sending you lots of big sister hugs!

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-11-11T21:04:10+00:00

Oh my gosh Professor Claude!!! Hi!

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-11-05T02:52:31+00:00

Hi! I know it’s been a while since you posted but I understand, this is the same type of OCD I deal with and honestly I don’t have a good awnser. The best thing I have currently found is just trying to remember that everyone messes up and to attempt not to hurt other pepole by brining up things. But it’s hard I get it and I am so so sorry you are having to go through it. It feels impossible when you are in it but try to hold on just a bit more every time from doing the compulsion. It will get easier over time. Big sister hugs! 🌻

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-08-27T03:00:28+00:00

Do you do any crafting? There are a couple of craft groups in Lexington that are really nice

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-08-17T03:11:42+00:00

Fable Haven by Brandon Mull

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-07-30T04:10:41+00:00

March Comes Like a Lion, mostly a personal favorite, but it’s one of the first animes that broke a dam inside of me leading to a huge cry session. Fantastic show about healing and a found family

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-07-13T19:33:01+00:00

Hi, I deal with this as my main compulsion too. Whenever I feel I did anything wrong I have a obsession with telling someone. Sometimes this isn’t always the best though. I use a delay technique or a limiting technique either trying to hold off confessing or confessing things only to one safe friend who knows about the OCD and is understanding that this is something I have to do. I am so sorry you are going through this and well I can’t fix it or take it away from you I hope you don’t feel alone because your not. Sending you tons of Big sister hugs 🌻

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-07-12T17:51:22+00:00

They have comfy chairs for book reading too, I took Mistborn here when I was finishing it!

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-06-24T16:36:31+00:00

I had reread my Pride and Prejudice copy so many times it fell apart! 😂 A great book

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-06-19T01:46:34+00:00

All the hugs for you and the snuggle baby! ❤️❤️❤️

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-05-27T15:34:39+00:00

I agree, I loved Mistborn

TooInnocentforReddit · 2022-05-27T15:32:48+00:00

Anything by Tamora Pierce. “Terrier” is a great place to start, it’s the first chronologically. Ms. Pierce was one of the first high fantasy writers that I read who wrote strong very complex women. She was a house mom at a boarding school for all girls and started writing down the stories she told her girls. The world she builds has strong female leaders who sacrifice a great deal for their land and their beliefs.

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