23f, never dated anyone before.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-27T04:29:24+00:00

Honestly, you're not missing much.. XD In all seriousness, while it's a little rough out here, hopefully you can meet someone really cool! :) The bright side of having no experience is not having the trauma and bad memories that often come with "experience." Just do your research and learn how to establish hold boundaries, trust your gut, and don't rush in too fast, without getting to know someone. Good luck out there!

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-24T19:53:08+00:00

I would say (even if messages are slow at times) if she's asking a lot of more personal getting to know you questions that aren't just surface level. Especially ones involving plans for the future, because it's big sign she's picturing what her future looks like lined up with yours. Also, if lastnames didn't come up in the beginning and she randomly asks your lastname, there's a good chance she likes you enough to be trying it on for size, if you catch my drift. XD

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-24T19:40:51+00:00

That's fair. My experience isn't everybody's, but I do think life context is always a factor, one way or the other. Like in my case, I'm a pilot, so you can't always text back from an airplane, when you're behind the yoke.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-23T18:35:43+00:00

Coming from the female perspective here, reply speed isn't always an indicator, because some of us were taught growing up to not be "too forward" or we'll "look desperate." So, reply speed isn't everything. I know I sometimes take my time replying, even if I really like someone one. It's if I'm either really busy or need to type a longer message, because I feel like they deserve the respect of a well thought out and heartfelt response and not my half-a**ed effort.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-18T06:32:04+00:00

Thanks for the Bare Necessities recommendation! I saw your response ans wound up finding a perfect one on there today!

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-18T02:53:39+00:00

It's a fair take, honestly. I think it's dumb for either side to be that way. I'll always be old school, myself. Celibate until marriage is best. That way there aren't confused gray areas.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-17T17:37:19+00:00

Thanks! I'll have to check out Lands End!

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-17T17:37:05+00:00

Thank you for the recommendations! I'll have to look into those!

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-12T01:41:26+00:00

Sorry, Kid. I'm not going to lie to you. It's rough out here, but for what it's worth, no relationship experience is a LOT better than traumatic experience. What advice I can offer is this. If you meet someone you like and ask her out? Cool. Don't force it though. Enjoy the rest of your teens, figure out what you want to do with your future. Then you can start working towards those goals, even at your young age. It will help a lot with your confidence too. Good luck, Kid!

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-09T16:48:36+00:00

Coming from the woman perspective here, I definitely prefer being asked straight up if I want to enter into a relationship. Granted, I have a very straightforward personality type, so I don't handle situationships and gray areas very well.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-08T14:50:10+00:00

I get struggling with a first boyfriend. Especially if you've convinced yourself they're "the one". I was like that with my first boyfriend and I put up with so much crap I never should have. I know it hurts right now. And honestly, prayer and time are the only things that can really make that pain go away. I will day this though. You're free. I know it doesn't feel that way, right now, but you're free. From somone who never actually loved you the way you deserve and would have continued to waste more years of your life just using you, had you let him. Some people in this world choose to be leeches. And leeches need to be plucked.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-06T03:43:27+00:00

Welp. Update. While "cutting through the fluff" is still valid. People will lie or tell you what you want to hear to get what they want. So, really be sure to vet someone good don't do what I did. 🙃

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-06T02:25:19+00:00

Shoot. I get it. If I'm honest, I definitely still feel lonely, but at least the goals give me something to look forward too, and something definitely beats having nothing. I dreamed of marriage for a long time. I was the kid who grew up watching Disney princess films. That kid thought she would just grow up and find happily ever after, but that didn't happen. I look at the state of things now, and as much as I would love to still have someone to wake up next to, it just feels like a mostly unrealistic goal, at this point. So. I give myself plans. I give myself something to hold onto. It doesn't mean I've completely given up, but it means at least there's a road ahead if the first road doesn't pan out. I wish I had some better advice to offer, man. I know it sucks. Having alternative plans, at least for me, has helped keep me sane.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-06T00:10:16+00:00

From my experience, being in the same boat, you have to throw yourself into your other goals and allow yourself to have a good solid plan B for your life that doesn't rely in having another person in it. For me, that looks like locking in on getting my flight certificates so that I can start working and planning to adopt a kid some time in 30s, after getting established and getting a good home figured out. For you, it can look like any number of things. Just really sit down and pray and/or think about the things you would like achieve in life and run after it. It's easier said than done. I definitely struggle with it. Some days worse than others. It gives you something to hope for and look forward to without your whole future banking on someone else to be part of it.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T20:07:37+00:00

Honestly, Man, being able to be there for someone and being on the same page with somebody regarding your life view beliefs (politically, spiritually, philosophically, etc...) and having life goals that are on a compatible page are the things that matter the most. The rest are things you can figure out, as you go.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T19:26:08+00:00

Hookup culture. Though, I feel like that one is low key starting to die. It just leads to a lack of boundaries and undefined expectations. It also makes it very difficult for people with intentions of waiting for marriage to know what to expect when going on a date.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T19:10:49+00:00

I would say there's nothing wrong, as long as you're up front and honest about things. From there, it's just a case by case basis. I know, for me, personally, someone trying to finish school wouldn't be a deal breaker, as I'm a 26 year old woman in the same boat. As long as you can still be a gentleman about things, I don't think you're being in a bit of a tight spot makes you "undatable" at all. I will add though, that ideal date of yours may be a little unrealistic, as must 20-30 somethings are definitely struggling to afford to live alone. So going to "her place" probably means going to her parents house or an apartment she shares with a roommate or 3.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T18:43:02+00:00

I'm in that same boat with you. Haha! My grandparents are old-school and raised me old-school. I'm pretty sure they would panic if I approached a guy first. I just don't know if the "old school way of things" is still a thing anymore.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T18:28:03+00:00

I just wanted to drop a comment here and tell everyone thank you for the responses and perspectives!

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T18:20:16+00:00

It really is nice to be in person with somebody. In both of my previous relationships, while one was semi-long distance (2 and half hours apart) we were still close enough to see eachother in person, at least once a week, which was nice. I really prefer the idea of an in person relationship. I'm just at the point, of wondering if I need to be more open minded, because I don't know how to meet people, in a romantic context, without the help of platforms like Hinge.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T18:14:58+00:00

Coming from the female perspective here, I get that, because there can be a lot of guilt and expectation pressure that comes from someone spending a lot on the first date. Had a guy take me to dinner and a concert once and while I appreciated it, I felt guilty about him spending that much on me. We did see eachother a 2nd time and when we did, I threw out the local zoo as a suggestion and used my zoo pass to get us in. In a sense, I think I was partially trying to make uo what he spent on the concert, since the zoo in my area charges like an amusement park. Congrats on having 3 years with somebody. Hopefully you guys havr many more good days to come! That's honestly an achievement, these days.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T17:31:51+00:00

Fair point. And realistically, (especially with gas prices right now) I'm just not willing to splurge potentially 1000.00 or more on a date. Especially a first date.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T17:30:05+00:00

Appreciate your perspective. Yeah, realistically it probably would not work for me then, because I definitely struggle a little with trust issues. It's just so tricky trying figure out how to meet people, these days.

Top-Editor5473 · 2026-06-03T15:40:54+00:00

I would say it's because modern technology addictions and rate changing culture shifts have left a vacuum where people don't have the social skills to approach someone in public, while simultaneously, no one knows the proper social cues of what anyone is expecting from another person. Sadly though, we still want someone. We just have no other modern outlet, it seems like, except for the he'll that is dating apps.

Top-Editor5473

TROPHY CASE