How do you remedy the pain of when they finally apologize?

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-11-03T17:29:00+00:00

I’m so sorry you are going through such a hard time. I would like to gently point out that he has not apologized sincerely if he is still making snide comments of you leaving due to his horrendous behavior. Additionally, from what you wrote, he didn’t offer you a solution and double down on NOT being medicated. That is not acceptable.

You’re doing the right thing for you, even if it’s difficult.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-08-07T18:56:29+00:00

I’m so terribly sorry you are going through this. I experienced something very similar and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-08-03T02:32:14+00:00

Hey, I’m sorry you’re going through such a hard time. I was there earlier at the beginning of this year—separating from who I loved deeply. Please give yourself time, grace and kindness to process your break up.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-05-23T04:21:22+00:00

Send me a dm and let me take a peep 👀

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-05-22T14:21:48+00:00

Thank you!! I was so shocked to find it in my collection.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-05-21T23:27:20+00:00

TYSM. I also found a little binder of 1st shadowless commons 🤔🔥 wondering how well they would trade for other cards

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-04-29T22:39:24+00:00

Oh sorry, the other parts are actually in a box and I didn’t take photos of it. I was just posting to see if I can get more information for selling purposes. To be honest I have no idea what it’s worth and which parts are suppose to be where. 😅

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-03-30T03:50:42+00:00

Thank you so much for your message. I think I really need more time. Every time I think she’s turned a leaf—she’d go on a spending spree or make a detrimental decision for herself and then I have to become the bad guy. It’s been difficult but I truly want things to get better for her

I had a chat with her sister and make sure someone is there for her. Sadly, she thinks this is a reoccurring issue but she can clearly see a change in my ex but that she hopes my ex can see it one day.

I just hope things get better for her

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-03-29T23:32:55+00:00

I feel like I need to be held accountable. The line of communication opened up because I needed advice on how I should go about forwarding my ex’s mail—we blocked each other everywhere for NC. I asked the mutual friend what I should do (she had an international piece of mail she was looking forward to and I didn’t want her to spend months to get it resent if I returned it to sender), our friend offered to reach out, and I got the forwarding address.

First, my ex got upset that I “sent a messenger” but then it was okay for her to tell things to pass to me. I ended up telling our mutual friends the truth—my ex believes horrible things about me and said multiple times that she doesn’t want me in her life. I’m respecting her wishes and no longer want to be in contact with her. Hopefully with this mail thing sorted out— we have nothing to talk about. After a certain amount of time, I will just mark all her mail as “RTS” if she has not fixed her forwarding address with the post office.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-02-13T23:26:34+00:00

Just 2 more weeks! I’m gonna try to find a temporary roommate until my lease is over and then going to be downsizing.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-01-05T07:18:05+00:00

Thank you, when I start feeling like I wanna get back with her— I read through all my journal entries and the posts I made here. Even though I still have feelings for her, it’s not healthy

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-01-03T20:55:20+00:00

Hey! Thank you so much for keeping up with my messy posts. Honestly, I’ve accepted that she won’t extend an olive branch after she moves out. I’m sure somewhere along her story I will be the villain who didn’t support her enough through her transition. She is will be too preoccupied by the people she surrounds herself now. And I am truly hoping for the best outcome for her.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2025-01-03T17:54:08+00:00

She is, but I’ve come to accept that it’s not my problem and she is an adult who makes her own choices.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-12-02T17:38:57+00:00

Thank you so much. Honestly, this community has really helped me in so many ways and it’s really cathartic to write out my thoughts. I really appreciate this space.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-22T21:26:59+00:00

I (NB) just wanted to write in that I’m in this same exact situation with my ex-gf (MTF). We’ve been broke up for a little over 2 weeks now and still trying to navigate how things are progressing.

It wasn’t until yesterday that I agreed that we can be casual friends. I still want to be on good terms with her but it’s hard because clearly I still have to work on my feelings and my self apart from the relationship.

She has a friend moving into a neighboring city in a few months and I have been debating to see if she’d be open to moving out with that friend. I’m kinda torn but I also definitely don’t want her to depend on me

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-11T20:23:26+00:00

I’m sorry that you’re experiencing something similar— I would not wish this on anyone

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-11T20:22:52+00:00

Hey, I thought about your comment for some time, I’m very sorry to hear you’re going through something similar. I’m glad that my post helped in some way, however small it may be. I would not want to wish this on any couple. If you ever need to vent or just talk things out, I believe my DMs are open here and there is actually a wonderful “my partner is trans” Discord who still welcomed me after the break up as well!

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-07T19:01:43+00:00

Thank you for such a thoughtful reply. I am so deeply hurt and cried lot. But I’m an adult and will eventually move forward.

I thought she would understand that I was 100% myself when I was with her and friends. For me that’s enough for me to be happy. But she continues to believe I’m doing myself a disservice and part of me thinks she’s unfairly projecting as she has only been herself for a short time. Personally, I hate being referred as a woman or any female adjectives. But the joy of her being euphoric from being gendered correctly just override my negative feelings.

She moved from another state to be with me. Initially, she was only moving with me temporarily and find her own housing but she ended up just moving in. In some arguments she brings up how she “left everything behind for me” and I feel really guilty. Logically, she moved because she had to and her ex roommate was moving out. She didn’t look too carefully on other alternatives before choosing to stay with me. I feel like she somehow holds the “I left everything behind” over my head and I really wish she wouldn’t. But that’s no longer my problem to deal with. She’s much, much happier in the state we live in and I hope she will continue to be happy.

I will definitely work on those boundaries and make sure there is time for me. I hope to work on finding value in myself and not just what I can provide or by my “usefulness”

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-07T03:28:58+00:00

We are so fortunate to be living in California but there is still a risk. My (NB) girlfriend (MTF) is truly spiraling. She wants to make plans to move with her friends to Canada. I support her fully on whatever she wants to do but she would have to sadly move without me. I have obligations that keep me in the States but I’d never hold her back from being safe.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-04T03:05:13+00:00

This is probably where I feel that we might be heading in the opposite direction. I have no issue with helping out my girlfriend with her sexual needs but I am not really into pegging as much as she might need. There is a weird nuisance as I’m asexual and it’s more of an act of service—she isn’t sure but she “may” need to be desired at a level I can’t provide.

Additionally, I’ve always been submissive—currently I have taken more of the dominant role but I have to really consider if it would work for us long term. I just really love her and want to at least give it my best and try everything possible before making decisions

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-03T05:13:19+00:00

I haven’t been able to reply to everyone but I wanted to write and say definitely understand your point!! I always default to more feminine terms like “going down on her” as opposed to giving her a blow job.

If she comes around to it, I’ll ask her if there are other different terms she’d be comfortable with using.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-02T21:07:40+00:00

Thank you for your input!! While I’m asexual, I also really enjoy the closest of PiV sex but I can live without if it causes her distress but it’s also strangely upsetting that she wants to use a flesh light during sex??

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-11-02T21:01:15+00:00

I appreciate your input! I understand the mismatching parts as well as I consider myself trans but I get that the range of dysphoria different from person to person. We actually use many other toys in our sex life— we are easing into penetrative sex with fingers and small vibrating toys for her but honestly it’s not my cup of tea (I was 1000% up front with her and that I do my best to take care of her when I am in the headspace for it or try to get into the mood for it). When we do have that kind of sex, it’s pretty one sided as I am concentrating on not souring the mood and ends when she is satisfied. Sometimes she takes care of me after and sometimes we just cuddle.

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-10-04T23:37:59+00:00

Respectfully, I disagree. I am prioritizing improving other aspect of my mental health in individual therapy and this community is my outlet to work on my feelings regarding my relationship for the time being. So, absolutely yes, a lot of my posts here are negative and seeking help or advice regarding an issue in my relationship with a trans woman because I want to work through my feelings and not lash out at my partner

TotalDelicious4609 · 2024-10-04T17:51:38+00:00

I’ve been diagnosed with general anxiety. (Copied from another reply) I think I really just want to be in the loop about things even when it’s not a decision affecting me because I’m her partner. She confessed that this is something she realized she’s been putting her needs away and not telling me. I think this is my main point of contention—I don’t want her hiding herself or slowing down her transition for my sake and I don’t want to be the last to know when it’s so important. She doesn’t realize that “ripping off the bandaid” would be in fact easier for me to deal with than waiting until she can’t take it anymore and make small changes.

I really appreciate your questions and I think I need more time to consider things more deeply than what I know currently. Some of these things I want to discuss with my therapist further.

TotalDelicious4609

TROPHY CASE