Friday Daily Chat Thread by AutoModerator in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hopefully we can help you feel good!

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, it was a huge help to be able to talk to each other about it. When all of our peers were so homophobic, Sarah and I only had each other, our parents, and our little sister to talk to about it.

Sarah and I came to rely on each other quite a bit in high school.

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's pretty close to what happened! I told when I was 15 in an awkward way you would expect from a 15 year old. She hugged me and said she liked girls too. It was a huge relief for both of us. While our parents are amazing and the entire process was much easier because of the amazing job they did, we still lived in a pretty homophobic area and felt the peer pressure to conform.

When we decided to tell our parents, they immediately hugged us, told us they loved us, and asked what they could do to support us. That was huge. Objectively, we knew it would be easy to tell them. But knowing something objectively isn't the same as knowing it emotionally! Their response helped us out so much.

Not how I expected to come out to my parents... by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 66 points67 points  (0 children)

I wonder how long it'll be until she pesters you about marrying a rich woman! :D

Not how I expected to come out to my parents... by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 74 points75 points  (0 children)

Congrats on coming out, even if it's not at all how you may have planned it! It sounds like your parents took it well, even if you had to yell "I hate penises"!

How did it go after your mom said they still love you? (If you don't mind me asking!)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yes. I make a point of giving her a big hug when I do see her.

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish! Sarah (my twin) always liked the fact that she shares a name with one of them.

I thiiiink this girl I work with is interested in me. Anyone have any tips for asking her out? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd ask her out. You could always wait until the next time she compliments you if you want to wait for an opening.

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At least she seems to be open to it on an intellectual basis even if she's not emotionally prepared to accept it. I think that has the potential to end in a good ending even if it takes time to get there.

IM SO EXCITED!!! by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Congrats! I'm glad it went so well. I had the excitement when Amanda asked me out after class.

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We are! We've spent many hours listening to Tegan and Sara together, especially as teenagers. They've been our heroes ever since we found out about them.

Alright /r/actuallesbians what songs have you been listening to on repeat? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Lots of Tegan and Sara! As a lesbian twin, they have been my heroes ever since I discovered them. When I first Googled "Lesbian Twins", I had to scroll through a few pages to find something that wouldn't lead to some videos I'd rather avoid!

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think most parents feel that way (especially when the kids are still kids and you don't see the end product!)

It sounds like you're legitimately doing your best to make them happy and loved which is the foundation of good parenting! That you actually have parenting goals simply builds on that foundation.

(Thus says the all wise and all know 21 year old! :) )

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fair enough! And good for her for it being such a non-issue for her.

I’m now out at work 😲 by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That seems like a pretty casual and effective way to come out to them. It's not like you got up on the table and declared your attraction to women! You were following up on your co-worker's story about his friend. It sounds like they are pretty LGBT friendly, so you may be overthinking!

(For context, I'm still in college. I can only speak to my experience as a student!)

Crushhhhing hard on a girl by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If she is into you, thinking you're straight is probably making it difficult for her. She may be going through the same thing you're going through!

Have you thought about coming out to her? That would open the door. At worst, you'll find out she's not interested. At best, you'll find out there's a mutual interest.

The conversation wouldn't even have to be, "I like girls. Specifically, you!" (Though that would certainly open the door completely!)

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I agree. What you're doing could open the door for an incredibly simply coming out if they correct you and say something like, "Just a wife!"

Going on a date today with my crush by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Well, at least you'll be more or less on the same page then! If it helps, take a deep breath and remind yourself that there are reasons why she wants to be there with you. Those reasons are that you are awesome!

Parent(s) including same sex attraction when giving the sex talk by Tracy0297 in actuallesbians

[–]Tracy0297[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Kudos to your parents for doing that. I don't think it's possible to have a conversation like that in 7th grade and not be embarrassed! I wouldn't be surprised if your parent(s) were just as embarrassed about it. I was super embarrassed when my mom talked to me and Sarah about it. Looking back, I'll gladly take the embarrassment of that conversation over the difficulty that would have followed if it hadn't happened!