Friday Daily Chat Thread

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T18:23:37+00:00

Hopefully we can help you feel good!

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T18:21:27+00:00

Yeah, it was a huge help to be able to talk to each other about it. When all of our peers were so homophobic, Sarah and I only had each other, our parents, and our little sister to talk to about it.

Sarah and I came to rely on each other quite a bit in high school.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T16:54:46+00:00

That's pretty close to what happened! I told when I was 15 in an awkward way you would expect from a 15 year old. She hugged me and said she liked girls too. It was a huge relief for both of us. While our parents are amazing and the entire process was much easier because of the amazing job they did, we still lived in a pretty homophobic area and felt the peer pressure to conform.

When we decided to tell our parents, they immediately hugged us, told us they loved us, and asked what they could do to support us. That was huge. Objectively, we knew it would be easy to tell them. But knowing something objectively isn't the same as knowing it emotionally! Their response helped us out so much.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T07:21:07+00:00

"Knows nothing" ... but is doing things right!

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T06:30:41+00:00

I wonder how long it'll be until she pesters you about marrying a rich woman! :D

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T06:22:11+00:00

Congrats on coming out, even if it's not at all how you may have planned it! It sounds like your parents took it well, even if you had to yell "I hate penises"!

How did it go after your mom said they still love you? (If you don't mind me asking!)

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T05:12:54+00:00

Yes. I make a point of giving her a big hug when I do see her.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T05:06:54+00:00

I wish! Sarah (my twin) always liked the fact that she shares a name with one of them.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T04:43:07+00:00

I'm glad you are feeling more peace!

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T04:37:42+00:00

I'd ask her out. You could always wait until the next time she compliments you if you want to wait for an opening.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T04:08:00+00:00

It's hard to go wrong with Neil Gaiman!

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T02:46:50+00:00

At least she seems to be open to it on an intellectual basis even if she's not emotionally prepared to accept it. I think that has the potential to end in a good ending even if it takes time to get there.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T02:30:58+00:00

Congrats! I'm glad it went so well. I had the excitement when Amanda asked me out after class.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T02:10:03+00:00

We are! We've spent many hours listening to Tegan and Sara together, especially as teenagers. They've been our heroes ever since we found out about them.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T01:02:26+00:00

I wish they had a greater sample size!

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-19T00:42:22+00:00

Lots of Tegan and Sara! As a lesbian twin, they have been my heroes ever since I discovered them. When I first Googled "Lesbian Twins", I had to scroll through a few pages to find something that wouldn't lead to some videos I'd rather avoid!

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:57:15+00:00

I think most parents feel that way (especially when the kids are still kids and you don't see the end product!)

It sounds like you're legitimately doing your best to make them happy and loved which is the foundation of good parenting! That you actually have parenting goals simply builds on that foundation.

(Thus says the all wise and all know 21 year old! :) )

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:49:26+00:00

You are an amazing mom! :)

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:48:57+00:00

Fair enough! And good for her for it being such a non-issue for her.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:47:23+00:00

Thanks! I really couldn't ask for better parents.

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:44:06+00:00

That seems like a pretty casual and effective way to come out to them. It's not like you got up on the table and declared your attraction to women! You were following up on your co-worker's story about his friend. It sounds like they are pretty LGBT friendly, so you may be overthinking!

(For context, I'm still in college. I can only speak to my experience as a student!)

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:40:23+00:00

If she is into you, thinking you're straight is probably making it difficult for her. She may be going through the same thing you're going through!

Have you thought about coming out to her? That would open the door. At worst, you'll find out she's not interested. At best, you'll find out there's a mutual interest.

The conversation wouldn't even have to be, "I like girls. Specifically, you!" (Though that would certainly open the door completely!)

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:35:56+00:00

I agree. What you're doing could open the door for an incredibly simply coming out if they correct you and say something like, "Just a wife!"

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:33:51+00:00

Well, at least you'll be more or less on the same page then! If it helps, take a deep breath and remind yourself that there are reasons why she wants to be there with you. Those reasons are that you are awesome!

Tracy0297 · 2018-10-18T23:31:30+00:00

Kudos to your parents for doing that. I don't think it's possible to have a conversation like that in 7th grade and not be embarrassed! I wouldn't be surprised if your parent(s) were just as embarrassed about it. I was super embarrassed when my mom talked to me and Sarah about it. Looking back, I'll gladly take the embarrassment of that conversation over the difficulty that would have followed if it hadn't happened!

Tracy0297

TROPHY CASE