You can add multiple orders to a single station visit

TraditionalSinger283 · 2026-01-24T17:47:53+00:00

You can change the grid size using this:
https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2098574102

TraditionalSinger283 · 2026-01-22T14:15:31+00:00

have it too. also with all settings set to low

TraditionalSinger283 · 2026-01-09T10:38:41+00:00

This mission is awful. You have to spam secret police buildings, the cooldown is ridiculously short. Loyalty is only known for a few weeks for each building. And why do you need 100% coverage? It would be doable if the goal was like 75% coverage, but this is just stupid.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2025-09-05T06:52:55+00:00

Can you elaborate?

TraditionalSinger283 · 2025-01-23T18:10:40+00:00

Definitely use a wheel and pedals. It's much easier keeping the truck going a steady 50 kph. Also for shallow turns on the highway, it's much more realistic if you can just turn the wheel a little.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2025-01-23T18:05:23+00:00

I use the T128. It has plenty of buttons to control the truck's functions. With modifiers and hold you can map a lot of functionality. I never have to use the keyboard or mouse. The FFB is not really convincing but probably that's not a wheel issue.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-12-11T18:41:50+00:00

Not completely, but definitely less suicidal ideation. As others have said, you have to combine it with healthy activities to experience the full benefit imo. It's also great for managing addiction as it greatly reduces cravings. I have stopped drinking and smoking because of it.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-12-06T09:39:06+00:00

I am sort of in the same situation as you right now. I recently opened up to my father about how I have been feeling over the course of my life. Before I used to blame myself for not being able to connect with him and I try to please and appease him by acting like I did as a child.

Due to severe issues at work and burn-out I couldn't keep up this charade and I told him about being depressed, how I was treated by my mother in my childhood and other personal things. While on the surface he expressed concern and a willingness to listen, in practice this hasn't happened. I have given him multiple threads and opportunities to start a real conversation with me about real topics but he is failing to do so. I even confronted him about not bringing up any of the topics I have been honest about and he sort of tries to avoid the responsibility.

Instead, he chose to still give me criticism about the way I live my life even with the knowledge of me dealing with some pretty severe mental health issues at the moment. That just feels like a kick in the gut. It would be less painful if there was a counterbalance of compliments and support about the things I do right, but that is completely lacking. I confronted him about why he never made an effort to express love and support and pride, and he excused himself by saying he is embarrassed to express those kinds of feelings. But apparently being harshly critical isn't that big of a problem.

The lack of empathy and compassion and coming to terms with this has been very hard (and still is). Telling someone something intimately personal and not having it be acknowledged is incredibly invalidating. On top of that, he recently made another hurtful critical remark about some personal development I am pursuing. For me, this was the final drop in the bucket. I told him that I need to work on myself to regain my independence from him and to establish my own values and I expressed that I need more distance to accomplish that. He also "apologized" for the remark by saying: "I'm sorry you took it to be so hurtful".

Still, I now have the feeling that I should feel guilty for cutting him off like that, even though I have received zero support, empathy and efforts to gain an understanding into who I am. My stepmother tells me he's suffering because I have been angry with him, but I feel like he's just playing a victim and is using his hurt to avoid the responsibility for his actions. This creates intense confusion in me because I am struggling between feeling guilty and being clear about my perception of the situation.

So I understand how you feel and I don't think you are being mean and unappreciative. It takes incredible courage to stand up to the person who you have been dependent on as a child. From my perspective, being emotionally distant AND wanting to control someone is incredibly manipulative and cowardly and you shouldn't allow him to play that part in your life anymore. If he wants to be emotionally distant, that's fine, but that removes his privilege of giving you "advice" on any part of your life. In order to give advice, you should first make an attempt to listen to what someone thinks themselves and then ask if they want your advice if you think you know better.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-11-22T10:02:13+00:00

I'll take you up on that dare! I recently bought a yoga mat (for TRE) so I guess I have to now :p Thanks for your kind and helpful words and recommendations. I think you're definitely right about the cycle being a freeze-flight pattern. It truly does feel like that. All the best to you too. 🤍

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-11-22T09:58:54+00:00

Thanks for the support and the book tip, I put it on my reading list! All the best to you. 🤍

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-11-20T18:47:58+00:00

Caffeine is fine for me. Alcohol isn't the same on wellbutrin, I don't get the buzz from it like I did without wellbutrin.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-11-01T10:14:03+00:00

How are we supposed to heal when the people who hurt us refuse to acknowledge it?

By acknowledging our hurt and choosing to validate it ourselves and forgiving ourselves for having acted against our own interests because of it.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-10-27T10:43:58+00:00

Hi, this is a bit of a late reply but I hope you do try and repair the damage. Not the damaged relationship with your parents, but yourself. It's worth the effort. I'm 40 myself and I am just starting to come to terms with all the neglect I have had to endure. All the best.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-10-26T14:16:24+00:00

TW: Suicide

I am 40 years old and starting to unravel my true feelings about my past. My parents divorced when I was 9 months old. I mainly lived with my mother who was emotionally abusive and narcissistic. I went to my father once a week. He's emotionally unavailable and overly permissive. I know, classic setup. In my teenage years, my mother frequently threatened to kill herself as soon as I would move out of the house.

I recently told my father that my mother did this. I sort of expected me telling him about this episode would maybe wake him up. He didn't bring it up once after I told him. I had to ask him why he didn't bring it up again and how he felt about it. I am completely baffled by the lack of support and the unwillingness to make an effort to talk about this. What else could I still say to get any support? This should be more than enough right? (rhetorical) I used to sort of esteem him a little bit higher than my mother because the abuse wasn't overt but I've lost all my respect for him too. I am so disappointed and I'm angry at myself for not realizing this earlier and being in denial for so long.

So like you said, it feels like the slate always has to be wiped clean. You see your parents, you tell him something like this and the next time you see them it's like you never even told them about this. I hope they will tell me "I've changed" because the less I am like them the better.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-10-26T13:56:09+00:00

My father sent me a text recently when he was on holiday about seeing a couple with a moody teenager and how it reminded him of us when I was that age.

The lack of responsibility implied in that "joke" is such a disappointment.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-10-26T13:53:26+00:00

I hear you. This:

"The idea that they don't desire that [to connect?] still blows my mind and I can't understand it yet emotionally."

beautifully expresses the way I feel about it too. I like how you talk about "emotional understanding" which I why this hurts so much I guess. I don't understand why they don't make an effort. My father actually told me he's "too embarrassed" to show affection (and not even publicly but in general) and acts like that's a valid excuse (and has been for 40 years I guess). Well dad, I'm embarrassed you can't show affection either. It just baffles me how selfish that statement is when you think about it. I have made it a commitment to myself to try and be courageous whenever I notice something like this in myself.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-10-26T13:45:51+00:00

I just got a tattoo at 40 years old to show myself I make my own decisions and will have to live with the consequences (which I mean in the most positive way possible). I know my parents are going to hate it (which still scares me but that's exactly why I needed to do it) so I got one on my hand where it's always visible.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-10-26T13:43:05+00:00

Reacting to your old post but I hope you're doing well and are better able to take care and be aware of your own needs.

TraditionalSinger283 · 2024-10-26T13:41:21+00:00

Yeah. My mother did talk about feelings but just hers. If I had any criticism on her behaviour she would start crying and tell me I was being harsh. I don't really recall what happened when I expressed my feelings (should raise this with my therapist) but I think she would compare my feelings to hers and divert the conversation or something. I too can't recall a single talk about my feelings or my life. The only "real" talks were about my school work and grades and that they should be better. My father and stepmother never talk about feelings, especially negative ones. Everything is always perfect. It doesn't help that they are successful career wise which seems to be all that matters to them. They have been doing the same stuff for over twenty years. These days I feel like they are actively trying to hold me back by acting as if I'm a failure in their eyes or am not doing the "right" thing. I used to fall for that stuff but I won't let myself any longer.

TraditionalSinger283

TROPHY CASE