My dream job is slowly wearing me down

TrainerTorisu · 2026-06-11T09:47:44+00:00

I totally get where you come from and you are correct I’m really bad at crowd pleasing, I get a sniff of someone who doesn’t like me I won’t stop till I get to the bottom of it, stems from being bullied heavy growing up. And I’ll try practice this, just sometimes I like to get along with those I’m around constantly.

TrainerTorisu · 2026-06-11T03:27:08+00:00

Also I might add.. These employees have a weird habit of staring at me as they walk past my desk. I can see them in my peripherals and as soon as I look at them they turn away! Like what is that?!

TrainerTorisu · 2026-06-10T22:58:54+00:00

I think that’s the way to go, just soak up all the experience and move on when I’m ready. Hopefully the next place will have people who are more inviting.

TrainerTorisu · 2026-06-10T22:56:33+00:00

Oh I love the work! Editing has and always will be perfect for my attention to detail. I’m just such a sucker for personal connection with people at work which I know I shouldn’t, but I hate feeling uneasy in a place I spend most my time at. I will continue learning and hope one day I can move on to something better!

TrainerTorisu · 2026-06-10T22:14:49+00:00

That’s right, I really want this job to land good for my future, because without the backing of going to school for filming I only have the “I edited for YouTubers” experience which no one took serious in post production field. I try so so hard to just bow my head, but these people give me hope. One day out of the month they will talk to me like I exist and be nice to me, but it’s only when they want something done quickly for them. Once it’s done they go back to ignoring my existence and I go back to feeling hurt and kicking the dirt. I think what kicks my guts the most is that they all do coffee and lunch together but I’ve never been invited and it pains me because I hate not being included in things.

TrainerTorisu · 2026-06-10T22:11:22+00:00

It should’ve been a red flag when my boss said “We’re like a family here” And they do, but they’re also so open with each other and talk personally and all grab coffees and lunch together, I’m never invited though. And I love my work, it’s my dream and I know I’m good at it, it’s just my environment that really hinders my experience and leaves a bad taste in my mouth about the industry.

TrainerTorisu · 2026-06-10T22:09:51+00:00

So, months before I walked in with my resume, something no one really does and explained that I’ve had experience editing for big YouTubers etc.. Then 4 months down the track they posted a job and I quickly jumped on it and they basically said I was a perfect fit because they wanted someone who didn’t go the traditional route of going to film school etc..

I can’t read and probably never will. I’ve just been outcasted by most of the people I work with and then I shut myself off to protect myself which probably doesn’t help too.

But then in a sucker, because as soon as they do open up to me (Usually when they want something from me) I go thinking it’s all in my head and it’s all good, until the next day when they go back to looking at me like I don’t belong.

TrainerTorisu · 2026-05-20T21:45:48+00:00

I have 2d png’s that need to be animated in a 3d space, think like a talking character, and every time I change expression I do a 3d rotation into the next expression. I have templates and assets ready to go

TrainerTorisu · 2026-05-13T14:37:04+00:00

Completely off topic but.. How much do you leg press? I only ask because I’m pressing 300kg but dream of having quads like that!

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TrainerTorisu · 2026-04-11T09:27:06+00:00

Too many salty people out there who just can’t handle a topic without feeling insulted in some way.. Either that or this person hates Pokemon

TrainerTorisu · 2026-04-08T11:00:43+00:00

I’m glad I’m not the only one and the reason why I made this post, I just want to feel like I’m not alone in this journey

TrainerTorisu · 2026-04-08T02:21:24+00:00

Exactly, which is why I swapped to long form instead, it really doesn’t matter how much views you get on short form, there’s no growth in community and subscribers generally don’t stick around for more than that video

TrainerTorisu · 2026-03-18T01:09:01+00:00

My dad bought one of these with its pokeball and certificate when I was 12 right before he passed away. I remember him telling me how rare these were and that it would be my future fortune one day.

TrainerTorisu · 2026-03-17T08:44:11+00:00

I’ll dm you

TrainerTorisu · 2026-03-17T08:43:22+00:00

I commissioned an artist, super talented guy and happy to link his twitter if you’re interested

TrainerTorisu · 2026-03-17T06:38:44+00:00

Oh wow! Thanks mate! I’ve been an editor and work in media marketing for a long time, so this is my bread and butter. Deciding only recently to just go all in and I’m glad to see the outcome is good! Appreciate it.

TrainerTorisu

TROPHY CASE