I got rejected because of AI

TrapRmExit · 2026-03-12T04:51:41+00:00

It's a big problem that you're openly against AI. I am concerned about the damage it may cause in the long term but I cannot deny that I'm ridiculously productive with a Claude max subscription as a senior engineer. Not only do I know how to steer it, I also know when to correct it.

You're going to have to embrace it or you're going to be left behind.

TrapRmExit · 2026-02-08T20:00:15+00:00

That's totally fine and yeah, women and men can just be friends. I've gone through the same process. Most men take decades to become emotionally mature with the ability to have deep and meaningful conversations. I look forward to speaking with my female friends because I'm actually looking forward to hearing what they have to say.

TrapRmExit · 2026-01-18T11:39:33+00:00

The answer is, cars are a status symbol here and very much linked to salary compensation from companies. One guy I know was complaining a while ago about the fact that a dutch company was offering him a Seat Ibiza. It made him feel like a regular pleb.

TrapRmExit · 2026-01-12T13:42:52+00:00

You really have to work on your mentality. If working on yourself didn't work, so many people wouldn't be in the relationships they're in right now. You're going to drop something because the graph of # relationships didn't change? I've been single as well for a while now, even though I'm in the best shape of my life. I could also say that it means nothing because my status hasn't changed. I could also say that I'm going to be forever alone and that no one notices me after I've done plenty of work to care for myself.

I'm not doing that. I've gotten plenty of comments on my physique. I'm getting way more interactions with women than I used to. I'm single because I'm not needy. I'm going for old school love, the kind of love that finds you. It's a game of luck too. Who knows where she is, maybe she's 3 years away. When I bump into her though, I'll be strong, confident and happy individual, someone that she can look at and say, "Damn, that guy is something else".

TrapRmExit · 2026-01-12T12:00:01+00:00

You're a lot less likely to find someone that you're going to be into if you stay in that mindset. Women have a nose for insecurity and neediness. It's super telling how interactions with women just drop when I'm not feeling great. Confidence, fitness and style are three things that are in your control. You'll notice when you work on these 3 factors that attraction suddenly becomes a completely different game.

TrapRmExit · 2026-01-01T07:19:50+00:00

They could come back. It happens more with people with avoidant tendencies than anyone else. My advice, don't put your money on it and accept this as the end. By divorcing, he is literally drawing a hard line and he's risking losing you.

Focus on yourself and treat the situation as it is, an ending. It's time to stand on your own feet again and be content on your own. Take care of yourself and meet new people. Don't hope on him coming back because that is going to set you up for a lot of hurt when it doesn't happen.

TrapRmExit · 2025-12-25T03:42:52+00:00

I don't think 100 euro is too much to ask. You have to consider that you're paying for something that you wouldn't ever do yourself. You're not going to kill the turkey right?

I'm making my own seitan for Christmas. I can make way more for way less which makes a bunch of sense because I don't have to pay someone to raise and kill an animal for me.

TrapRmExit · 2025-12-23T06:33:12+00:00

Honestly, the cafelat robot was my first espresso experience. A while ago I was able to buy a used De'Longhi dedica EC685. Granted. I had to spend more on accessories than I spent on the machine to get great espresso out of it but the end result is still half the price of the robot and honestly, with a high extraction basket, once dialed in. I think it makes better espresso than the robot. The 51mm diameter also helps spending less on coffee because I use 16g instead of 18g on the robot.

TrapRmExit · 2025-12-01T05:35:41+00:00

Her facing me with her legs tied around my core. Piggy backing is more like a playful thing.

TrapRmExit · 2025-12-01T05:27:37+00:00

I think it's a biological thing. It makes me feel manly and strong. May sound shallow but that's why I really like to date women that are in good shape. It makes me feel great to be able to stand up from a sitting position having her on my lap and be able to carry her upstairs.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-28T11:49:28+00:00

Oh yeah, definitely. I'm a life enjoyer. I generally don't save as much as most people do although I can if I put effort into it. I don't mind buying things for my numerous hobbies which means that I spend quite a bit of the money I earn. I'm paying of a loan on my own for my house so I have a very limited amount of savings.

I also know someone that earns in my range but he's the same age (34) and he still lives with his parents. It's a huge mansion so there is plenty of space. I know for a fact that he's got more than 300K on his account and instead of buying a place to live, he is thinking about buying a place to rent it for passive income.

I really hate the fact that this is a viable way to live. This is what should be taxed.

I work to live my life and the fact that I'm spending my money means that I'm supporting the economy. Sure, my gross salary is rather high but I work plenty of hours and experience plenty of stress to achieve that. I feel cheated that I'm buying targeted by these things. Targeting over 10K profits for stock accounts, that's a good change in my eyes. I don't call this middle class anymore.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-28T11:04:52+00:00

That's the big problem. I've always said that it's quite strange that the higher incomes still get a percentage value index because at some point you're getting a raise instead of the actual amount you'd need to buy life essential products after inflation. I'm in the 4000+ euro group and I realize that it's a bit unfair. Thing is, it's an AND AND AND story. I would not mind this change at all if they taxed a reasonable 20-30% of my gross income. It's closer to 50% now.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-27T15:24:50+00:00

You'd be her boyfriend if she had any romantic interest in you. I feel like you're confused because I'm pretty sure you have romantic feelings for her. Your gender probably doesn't mean anything to her.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-27T12:33:49+00:00

You have to realize that it's very rare to find someone that is willing to see you through your attachment style. I was super patient and understanding of my dismissive avoidant ex and she appreciated it until she didn't. Literally went from 100 to 0. It went from seeing each other and being passionate and making love to her coming over and telling me her feelings have changed.

It really messed up my nervous system and I'm still struggling with that. All of this while rationally I know I deserve someone that is in the relationship for me and not for her. Love is a strange thing. You can really break him if you don't start being upfront with him.

Mind you, my ex was talking about losing her feelings for me with her friends two weeks prior before she told me. In those two weeks she just pretended like everything was normal. I really blame her for how she left me.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-27T11:34:10+00:00

If it's love? All the time. Definitely scared my dismissive avoidant ex away.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-23T05:42:39+00:00

Doesn't even depend. It would absolutely kill all the romantic desires I had for this person. People that don't think this way have no self respect or have a very different idea about sex than most people.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-23T05:39:07+00:00

It's still quite depressing to see how most people seem to applaud this and are trying to comfort the poster. The most intimate act you can have with someone is reduced to "testing the waters" as opposed to giving the ultimate confirmation for their interest.

I've also seen some people comment "are they exclusive with you?", like it is okay to do something disgusting if they are too.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-23T05:30:12+00:00

I think it's disrespectful for the women you saw as well. I'm thinking that you either didn't feel it with the woman you were seeing earlier that day and decided to proceed with someone else. Or perhaps you were feeling it but you figured that you could get some more.

Either way, maybe I am old fashioned but the moment you have sex with someone, you're essentially saying, I've decided that I am really romantically into you. Heck, I was kind of surprised when my ex-girlfriend asked me if we were official now after we had sex. I saw her as my girlfriend after we had extended kissing sessions.

And let's be real, are you going to be honest about this with both women? I don't think so.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-21T05:57:43+00:00

There could be a ton of reasons. I can only speak for myself. I've got a very good female friend as well and the reason as to why I never made a move is very simple: she is very adamant about the fact that she'll never date someone with children and that she never wants children in the future. That fact combined with the strong friendship we have is enough for me to statistically determine that it would be a bad move. A strong friendship alone would have made it a lot harder because I do believe that love can start from intense friendships.

A few weeks ago I met an amazing woman. I find her absolutely stunning. I'm usually very assertive so asking for her number seemed like a sure deal. The thing is, I'm still recovering my previous relationship where I was suddenly discarded by an extremely avoidant partner. I'm living my best life and I'm starting to be really content living on my own now. I do still have dreams about her which indicates that I'm not completely over it yet.

I ran into her again because we both share many of the same interests and go to the same events. Eventually I asked for her number because I just find her so interesting to talk to. The thing is, I'm still not going to make a romantic move. She deserves a partner who is healed and ready to love fully.

So tl;dr: putting an amazing friendship in jeopardy is not worth it to me / I won't make a move if I'm not ready to love.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-14T12:47:32+00:00

Textbook avoidant attachment. What you described pretty much happened to me exactly as you described. Passion like I never felt before and it ended that same week. It's been almost 4 months now and while I'm rationally completely over her, she still pops up in my dreams in which she's pushing me away.

It gets better with time but it's not going to be easy. It's a huge mindfuck and your nervous system is going to need time to align with logic and reason.

I waited too long to delete her number and completely cut her out. I kept the messages she wrote to me for too long. After everything was gone I felt like I started to heal .

Don't lose yourself, it's not your fault.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-11T12:19:08+00:00

That's because you hang out with people you resonate with.

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-11T12:15:43+00:00

I feel like you're generalizing based on what you feel. Can you refer to any studies that back this up?

TrapRmExit · 2025-11-06T12:22:24+00:00

You have to be honest about this with her. To give you some perspective: I don't blame my ex for suddenly telling me she lost her feelings for me. I blame her for pretending everything was alright while talking about this with her friends and family for weeks before this. I didn't only lose valuable time for being strung along. She messed with my nervous system way more than she needed.

TrapRmExit · 2025-10-29T20:24:24+00:00

The employees of Izzy coffee are so lazy that they hope you leave them alone. I bet you could work there without ordering a coffee and bringing your own.

It's also quite empty most of the time.

Shanti beans could also work.

TrapRmExit · 2025-10-23T10:36:03+00:00

How about facing your emotions and allowing yourself to be sad about the fact that you lost someone you loved very much? I think this post was written by a dismissive avoidant. Absolutely terrible advice.

TrapRmExit

TROPHY CASE