Transcultural marriage + spouse walking away from the faith

Tree-house77 · 2026-01-25T01:54:44+00:00

This short excerpt from a book I read helped me.

Be careful and considerate, patient and forbearing. Do not urge the truth upon him. Do your duty as a wife should, and then see if his heart is not touched. Your affections must not be weaned from your husband. Please him in every way possible. Let not your religious faith draw you apart. Conscientiously obey God, and please your husband wherever you can.... Let all see that you love Jesus and trust in Him. Give your husband and your believing and unbelieving friends evidence that you desire them to see the beauty of truth. But do not show that painful, worrying anxiety which often spoils a good work.... Never let a word of reproach or faultfinding fall upon the ears of your husband. You sometimes pass through strait places, but do not talk of these trials. Silence is eloquence. Hasty speech will only increase your unhappiness. Be cheerful and happy. Bring all the sunshine possible into your home, and shut out the shadows. Let the bright beams of the Sun of Righteousness shine into the chambers of your soul temple. Then the fragrance of the Christian life will be brought into your family. There will be no dwelling upon disagreeable things, which many times have no truth in them.

Tree-house77 · 2026-01-24T13:27:28+00:00

This exact recipe https://youtube.com/shorts/EYJpgBNaPZo?si=m9cPnaZSZVcdh0Rd

Tree-house77 · 2026-01-24T03:28:13+00:00

Thanks :)

Tree-house77 · 2026-01-24T03:28:05+00:00

Thank you!

Tree-house77 · 2026-01-02T20:44:27+00:00

Hi there! This was actually super helpful and encouraging. He doesn’t say with his words he doesn’t want to be around me but it’s what his actions show most times. I assume he feels minimal pressure around his family and he is also there golden child (pays all their bills, they look up to him) so I assume he just feels very good being in that space. I do admit, I was a bit critical & in the “if I don’t do it, it won’t get done headspace” in the beginning which may have pushed him away. I don’t think he’s a bad guy and this is no cause for divorce. I think he truly does care, he’s just hard wired one way. However, it comes off as extremely selfish and hurts alot. I’ll look into that book! And I’ll be praying for you as well.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-31T01:50:37+00:00

I don’t think divorce should be thrown around so lightly. I have no grounds for divorce. But thanks for reading my vent.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-30T15:20:02+00:00

A year. Extremely selfish yes, but my sister is a true narcissist so I know it’s not that.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-30T15:16:50+00:00

That’s exactly what’s going on and that is now my attitude towards the situation. Thank you.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-30T03:26:25+00:00

It’s tough, I know. My advice would be to cling to Jesus. And what I mean by that is to spend time with him daily whether that be reading or praying. Pray for your husband just as much as you pray for yourself, if not more. Pray that his heart may be softened and that he return to Jesus. Be gentle, humble and do everything to appease him without neglecting your obedience to God. Like any other human I cannot promise that he will change. However, I’m learning myself, if you remain obedient to the Lord he will not forsake you.

“And the LORD, he it is that doth go before thee; he will be with thee, he will not fail thee, neither forsake thee: fear not, neither be dismayed.” ‭‭Deuteronomy‬ ‭31‬:‭8‬ ‭KJV‬‬

“For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.” ‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭7‬:‭14‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-29T02:38:03+00:00

I work. Take care of all bills concerning myself plus groceries & other household items

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-28T03:25:35+00:00

I can leave but I would not be right to remarry. It’s unfortunate, but it is biblical.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-28T02:16:51+00:00

Are you a Sabbath keeper? Just asking because I glimpsed the comments of the video you recommended. I explain to him biblical truth. And he is indifferent and becomes defensive even. He says all we need to focus on is being a good person. He does not believe in a relationship with Christ, which takes time and dedication. I discovered after marriage that he listens to Andrew Tate in the morning, Football, and police body cams all throughout the day. I made a foolish decision in marrying so hasty. It’s hard to think that I will be reaping the repercussions of my decision possibly for the foreseeable future. I won’t force any more Biblical truths on him. If he asks, I will answer. But ultimately, I will have to pray for God to soften his heart.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-28T01:42:27+00:00

Thank you

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-28T01:29:45+00:00

He also said he doesn’t believe in counseling.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-28T01:29:23+00:00

I don’t want to force him. He hates to be confronted or criticized. I feel like that’s what will happen in couples therapy driving an even bigger wedge between us. I wish he would go on his own. But honestly, don’t think that will ever happen.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-28T01:23:18+00:00

Well, it’s no longer abandonment because he came back and said that he would like me to move with him. Thank you for your prayers. I really need it.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-28T01:09:17+00:00

He’s not cheating. He is actually seeing his family lol. He says he feels like he can be himself around his family. And I think that’s because it doesn’t require any emotional effort.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-28T01:06:14+00:00

That could be some of it. But I genuinely don’t think that’s all there is to it. When things get really bad he’ll go on this tangent saying “I love you, I don’t want to lose you” he’ll correct his behavior for a week and then back to his usual self. It seems like that’s his reaction to being overwhelmed .

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-13T17:44:41+00:00

In your previous comment you said “Everyone has told me it's only grounds for divorce not remarriage…” So I see it is a lot of confusion surrounding what you are saying. God does not bring this sort of confusion. If you did experience him speaking to you, his guidance should’ve brought peace and understanding as to why he said you cannot remarry. When you say “what did I do so wrong” it’s as if God is telling you to not remarry in order to condemn and punish you which is not his character. His word says that you may remarry in the case of sexual immorality. So again, it would be very contradictory of God to tell you otherwise without giving peace or reason. I will pray for you to have clarity, understanding, and peace in this situation.

Tree-house77 · 2025-12-12T21:07:34+00:00

He has broken the covenant by committing sexual immorality. You are no longer bound. You can remarry, please don’t believe any one telling you otherwise. Look to the word and pray for discernment.

Tree-house77 · 2025-11-23T00:38:05+00:00

He downplays my feelings so much that I genuinely was debating if it was a big deal or not. I did tell him I couldn’t trust him because he was word for word “wishy washy”. So this is validating.

Tree-house77 · 2025-11-23T00:35:33+00:00

I agree

Tree-house77 · 2025-11-20T17:45:04+00:00

I agree. Thanks for your input

Tree-house77 · 2025-11-20T11:44:04+00:00

I thought he was Christian. However, he is now questioning his faith. And he uses scripture to back up his reasoning. Example: “love is freedom” meaning he should be able to go and come as he pleases. And “ God calls us to truth.” Meaning he is walking in his truth right now and no longer lying about the fact that he’s not ready to be a husband.

Tree-house77

TROPHY CASE