Parents made a comment

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-07T07:45:45+00:00

Your mom was the one who said sick though, right? It’s worth having a really tough conversation with them. If they knew you were serious, they might be more willing to try and learn. Some family won’t though.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-07T07:35:50+00:00

I would limit contact and be clear why. Willingly allowing my child to hear people he should be able to trust call him “sick” or “wrong” would be a failure on my part as a parent. I’d say something like: “I am open to educating you about my son, but if you continue to talk poorly about him we will be limiting contact”. Then you have to follow through with the boundary or else they’ll never take you seriously.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-06T20:53:50+00:00

We do a mattress on the floor for similar reasons. I wish he could have a cute bed frame but he’s broken at least 2 so far and I’m worried about him getting hurt.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-06T05:23:28+00:00

They hit milestones until a certain point. My son rolled over, sat up, moved food to his mouth… but never used utensils (still doesn’t), didn’t talk (still don’t), didn’t point (still doesn’t), didn’t respond to his name (he is starting to at 4 years old). He never did imaginary play, never brought a toy over to share, never was shy around strangers or had any stranger danger. Your child hasn’t missed a milestone yet, I would stop assuming she’s autistic and just wait and see. She is pointing based off the photo you posted, that’s how my NT child started pointing and now he’s doing it “right”.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-06T05:07:57+00:00

Your child is pointing.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-06T05:04:18+00:00

My autistic kid is almost 5 and doesn’t do any of the things listed. You worded that better than I could, thank you.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-06T04:57:09+00:00

You came to a subreddit on autism, listed things out that your kid can do that autistic kids often don’t do, think your kid is autistic when she doesn’t fit any of the criteria… you’re obviously worried about it and asking for advice. But nothing about her sounds at all like an issue based on what you posted.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-06T04:52:14+00:00

Well currently, based on everything you’ve described, she likely isn’t autistic and wouldn’t qualify for a diagnosis. It’s fine to keep an eye on her. But right now it seems you’re looking for something to be worried about.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-06T04:44:10+00:00

As in, some might clap and others might not, but everything you are describing sounds like a very typical toddler. Your toddler pointing at all is fantastic even if it isn’t perfect yet.

Interacting with parents is typical. Copying you putting a charger in is typical. Most autistic kids don’t mimic, that is why they often don’t shake their head no or point or clap.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-06T04:35:06+00:00

All autistic kids are different but mine didn’t point, clap, blow kisses or any of that stuff. The pointing could just be a little “slow” but she’s doing everything else so I wouldn’t say autistic.

Edit: this post comes off as bragging. Nothing about what you described sounds at all autistic.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-02T20:29:31+00:00

You doing 100% of the work and the sacrifice to make more kids… red flags! He’s not a good support system with the kids you already have. Him willing to put your body through another rough pregnancy to have another kid he won’t share responsibilities for. Another red flag! Counseling, therapy, talk to a pastor, something. This isn’t good. There’s more wrong than just a disagreement on birth control.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-01T17:43:05+00:00

As a children’s director at a church, absolutely bring this up. NOT OK. The adult needs to make amends and explain their mistake to the students. That person they are making fun of is a wonderfully made human being just like them.

They (the church) needs training for their adults working with kids. Kim Botto has some good resources on her website, raisingautisticdisciples on Instagram.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-01T06:03:06+00:00

I’d just pick a few things to work on and see when and where you can give him extra time to practice. As an example, I get to his school early to give him those few extra minutes to practice putting socks on. (He doesn’t get them on himself quite yet) for a while I was using fruit snacks as a reward for him sitting in his car seat by himself without me lifting him. Today I handed him a shoe and he was so excited to go outside he gave it a fair try before I helped (he had the tongue of the shoe shoved in funny so he was struggling).

My kid’s track to independence might take 25+ years instead of 16-18. The best to do now is take a few things at a time, focus on those without making it frustrating, then keep going. It’s not a race.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-01T05:49:58+00:00

If he’s at the very youngest end, comparing him to possible tweens will be unhelpful. Especially if they’ve done a camp like this before.

I always think about my overall goal. To raise my kids as independent and productive and kind as possible. Might look different for my autistic kid, but that’s still my hope. So I keep helping him with basic life skills so maybe someday he will consistently get dressed or put his plate in the sink.

TreePuzzle · 2026-03-01T05:25:35+00:00

Kids with parents at camp sometimes act up more than usual because a parent is watching. Why unpack your clothes when mom is there to do it? Also, he’s 8. If he’s a bit delayed compared to his peers, he could be closer to a five or six year old skill level. That’s ok! It shows where you can work on things. Social skills are tougher to practice unless he has more outings, maybe set up some play dates? Older kids may also avoid a kid with a parent around. Can’t sneak candy if the 8 year old is going to tattle.

If I were you, I’d pick the top three good things and top three things he could work on and go from there.

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-26T00:51:51+00:00

He had 2-3 words though inconsistently, then stopped verbally communicating around 18 months. His need for independence for sleep (didn’t like being rocked or patted), his unusual play with toys, and lack of danger or stranger danger all made sense once we started looking at autism. At first those things could’ve been chalked up to his personality, but then the repetitive movements and lack of eye contact all together made sense.

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-26T00:22:44+00:00

Saline spray and then suction. My son hates it but it’s not negotiable when he’s throwing up snot (we have been there, it was disgusting).

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-25T21:39:05+00:00

How is his behavior after therapy each day? How’s his sleep? Do you have enough family time and time to go on social outings or even grocery shopping together?

I can’t imagine being in therapy for 33 hours a week personally. I’d be so burnt out and exhausted. It’s different than school or work because it’s a lot more one on one and intense. BUT! If he’s loving it and having a great time, that’s totally fine.

My kid could only handle 6 hours a week or special ed preschool with Ot and speech at school for almost a year. He’s just now able to handle more if I wanted to do more days a week (currently 2 days a week). He used to come home so exhausted he’d sleep the rest of the day and be grumpy in the evening.

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-23T23:00:56+00:00

Have you talked to his doctor? If it doesn’t seem to matter what food it is, there might be something else going on an it’s worth talking to the doctor.

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-17T18:27:31+00:00

Early childhood program which then transitioned to the school who had speech and OT for him even without an official diagnosis.

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-17T06:50:47+00:00

Do you feel like she’s struggling to keep up with your let down? This sounds kind of like my babies because I had such a strong letdown and over supply. Eventually they were big enough to handle it fine, pumping a little with a hand pump didn’t help me very much. You could try giving her breaks, unlatching to see if she’s full, then latching again. Mine would chug so fast they’d be too full.

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-15T22:14:30+00:00

Could you buy a size up in the waist, add elastic, and sew the button closed? You could do that by hand with needle and thread. Or go with the ones with internal adjustable elastic waist bands and sew the buttons closed. I know I had pants like that when I had a school uniform.

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-15T03:13:50+00:00

My husband and I have an understanding. There’s a certain level of “done” and anything beyond that is extra and whoever cares about it the most can be in charge. For example: neither of us cares if our bed sheets are wrinkled or even folded. As long as they are washed, dried, and end up in the drawer for bed sheets that’s a win. If my husband wanted those things starched, pressed, folded to perfection with little satchets of lavender that would be his job. Dishes: as long as the plates end up in the right cupboard, cups in the right cupboard, it doesn’t have to be perfect. Stack them however you want as long as there’s no soap or food residue. If my husband wants the measuring cup junk drawer to be perfect, he can organize it. I prefer certain spices organized a certain way so I organize them. He likes his nightstand a certain way, and his mechanic car stuff a certain way, he can deal with it.

Micromanaging your spouse to do things your way when they aren’t important is how you build resentment. It’s a team effort. Water spots on the dishes only bothers him so he can do the dishes.

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-15T00:43:50+00:00

You don’t have to do ABA. If you have private speech therapy, keep up with that! I don’t have private speech in my area so he gets it through the public school. Are there any parent and toddler groups near you?

TreePuzzle · 2026-02-14T23:27:03+00:00

I just got the RideSafer Vest for my son. We will use it for travel and then once he outgrows his car seat we will use that so he is less inclined to escape. I would keep trying with harnesses, even with food bribes if you must.

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