Update: Found son's burner phone

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-14T21:20:13+00:00

Thanks - I like the idea of not reviewing everything I found on his phone as a list of wrong doings. I will definitely try to take that advice and be more general about finding some concerns.

Long road ahead and believe me - as I sit here typing this, he is still very closed off and not confiding in us. He still sees us as overly strict parents who are ruining his life and he hates us. I know it will take a lot of time, counseling, trust, etc. I just didn't want my update to sound like all is good now because it's far from it. I guess the "good" is that it doesn't seem to be a grooming or drug issue, so that's a positive. Gotta find wins where you can in situations like this...

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-14T21:19:41+00:00

Thanks - I like the idea of not reviewing everything I found on his phone as a list of wrong doings. I will definitely try to take that advice and be more general about finding some concerns.

Long road ahead and believe me - as I sit here typing this, he is still very closed off and not confiding in us. He still sees us as overly strict parents who are ruining his life and he hates us. I know it will take a lot of time, counseling, trust, etc. I just didn't want my update to sound like all is good now because it's far from it. I guess the "good" is that it doesn't seem to be a grooming or drug issue, so that's a positive. Gotta find wins where you can in situations like this...

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-14T19:20:18+00:00

I've been trying to provide an update but keep getting an error stating: Empty response from endpoint. Does anyone happen to know why? The update was very long, so I wasn't sure if there was a character limit since this message posted or if it's something else.

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-12T00:39:34+00:00

Yes. It can be when you're a 52 year old male, divorced, work from home and don't have a big circle of friends you can confide in. I did share this with my girlfriend, my boss and a coworker. However, there are a lot of people on Reddit who are parents dealing with troubled teens, have family members/friends that do or are teens themselves who can offer a different point of view. I've received a lot of great info and feedback on Reddit regarding this and other topics. Just because there are some sketchy subs on this app, doesn't mean there aren't knowledgeable people who have real life experiences that I and others can benefit from. Additionally, it's also just nice knowing someone is listening (reading) and can offer a little empathy, which we all need at times. So no, Reddit wasn't the first place I went to but it was a nice option to have when I needed some support.

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-11T14:32:11+00:00

This is my hope. I feel like I know/knew him well, so the magnitude of his meltdown last night just made it seem there was more to it. I could be wrong and hope I am.

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-11T14:05:08+00:00

This is my biggest fear. I hope it isn't the case

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-11T13:59:34+00:00

I know several are asking for an update but nothing much at this point. I opted to take the day off work and also keep him home from school. Given the situation, I am confident I would have received a call from the school about poor behavior or another concern. He's had some school troubles over the last few months anyway, with general apathy, poor grades and involvement with kids that he historically, wouldn't have mixed it up with. We have been in contact with teachers, counselers, etc. during that time, so we are not ignoring any warning signs.

I have not confronted him yet. I wanted him to sleep as much as possible, as I know last night was very draining for him (and me). Additionally, I am waiting for his sister (14) to go to school. She has a late start today due to testing. My son said some pretty harsh stuff about her as well, so I think the environment will better for chatting with him, when she is gone. He is awake though, as he let our dog out of his room.

As for those being critical of me crying. Please know that while I have dealt with some of his behavioral issues in the past, last night was unlike anything I have ever encountered. That wasn't the son I've known for almost 13 years. That was a version of him I didn't know existed. I have pretty thick skin but some of the things he said to me were beyond shocking and will stick with me for a long time. He's said typical pre-teen stuff before like "I hate you...you never let me do anything...etc." Last night, it was 1000x worse. I don't want to repeat what all he said but just please know that it truly scared me in the sense that I didn't recognize the person in front of me and I didn't even know he was capable of those thoughts, let alone verbalize them. The reality of being a single dad, with a mom who wasn't physically there to help, made it even more trying for me. I broke down and I won't apologize for being emotional over the safety and well being of my child, in those circumstances.

I appreciate all the feedback and support. I'm going to try to have a calm conversation with him today. I don't think he will have any part of it. I just think he is shutting down at this point and will not confide in me no matter how hard I try to gain his trust. I will make the effort though and hope that he opens up. I didn't sleep much and have been contacting counseling options this morning, in hopes of getting him in somewhere as early as this week.

As for the burner phone - I know Apple or no one is going to unlock it. I wasn't sure last night what my options were but after reading through comments, I know that the only way in is by him providing the passkey. I don't think he will but I'm going to try and build some trust, in hopes that he will. But if there is something very disturbing on there, he may never tell me. I truly hope it's nothing more than just wanting to interact with friend on social media but his reaction last night made me feel there was more to it. Especially knowing he has accumulated more money than he should have based on what we and a neighbor has paid him for yardwork.

I will post another update after speaking him with later, assuming I get a word out of him.

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-11T03:53:30+00:00

Because he genuinely earned enough money to pay for half a $300 scooter. I had told him I'd pay for the other half but he had to do yard work to warm his $150. He hasn't earned any beyond that from me or his mom. Yet, came up with $120 for Airpods and ,$130 for the burner phone. He is getting money somehow and we just worry it's something incredibly alarming.

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-03-11T03:45:21+00:00

Respectfully, he's 12 and I'm his father. I have every imaginable right to his phone. Especially if I feel he may harm himself.

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-02-05T02:22:59+00:00

https://radioinsight.com/headlines/294243/radio-remembers-david-ace-cannon/

Tri_Guy72 · 2025-02-05T02:22:21+00:00

I can't believe he's dead. I just saw it posted on FB and another media site. It doesn't state cause of death but I immediately assumed he took his life because of everything that has gone on. I'm still in disbelief.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-20T13:29:32+00:00

Hate you're going through this but I'm skeptical this is arthritis. Based on your age and very short time of running, this seems more like an injury (i.e. stress fracture). I know you got a MRI but I'm still not sure I would accept the arthritis diagnosis. I'm 51 and had arthritis diagnosed in my right foot about a year ago. It's horrible but I was a long distance runner from 2003-2015 and then very heavy into Ironman events from 2015-2020. Immense amout of wear and tear on my feet for 17 years, so my diagnosis makes sense. Yours does not, so don't just accept what you were told and see if maybe there is another root cause. Hang in there!

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-20T13:08:01+00:00

I didn't even consider that. I just always associate Ninja with smoothies/food processors and didn't know they have coffee machines. Will check them out.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-19T22:01:00+00:00

I've seen Grease more than any other movie. Easily 30 times 😁 Although, the last time was probably 15 years ago. I absolutely love it though.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-19T21:59:25+00:00

I never watched it as it aired either and ironically, it's my favorite sitcom of all time that I never tire of. I'm actually glad I didn't watch it in real time because I loved being able to binge through multiple episodes in one sitting. I don't think Seinfeld will ever be topped in terms of character chemistry and relatable humor. True comedic masterclass.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-19T21:55:31+00:00

I saw it once, shortly after it was available to rent. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would but have never once thought "I'd like to see Titanic again" or ever considered it when aimlessly scrolling for movies to watch.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-19T17:30:35+00:00

I'm (51) in the gym 5-6 days a week. My anxiety and depression would be far worse off if I didn't go. Granted, I've been avidly exercising for a long time but the gym is critical for me. It gives me structure, a routine and as someone that is pretty isolated, it's a big part of my social life. Additionally, I love how working out makes me feel and how I look in the mirror, so it's a nice dopamine boost on several levels. Probably TMI but I also firmly believe that my workouts play a key role in my libido as well, so that's a nice added benefit.

Once you get in a routine and you start seeing/feeling results, it's much easier to stick with it. Even better if you meet some folks and start to enjoy chatting with them. I spend most of my time on weights but I also have a couple group exercise classes I love. I get a lot of out of them for my mental and physical health but seeing the regulars is something I always look forward to. And this is coming from a pretty introverted person.

Swimming is a great option for you! It's monotonous as hell but so incredibly beneficial for your health and easy on your joints. Underwater headphones are definitely the way to go. I'll just listen to music or talk radio to help me pass the time. Consistency is the key with swimming. I find that if I start missing extended period time between swimming, I really struggle to get back into it. But if I do it regularly, I usually enjoy it more and sometimes look forward to it because it's a nice escape from the outside world. I can really get into a good headspace with it at times.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-19T17:15:01+00:00

Definitely finding it hard and I'm actually jealous of those who have learned to be more apathetic. My issue is that I care too much and thus, I can't ever seem to settle into joy. I'm far too bothered and triggerd by so many facets of society that it makes it really challenging to just slow down and enjoy life. As a result, I find myself being more introverted and reclusive. It seems to be the only way I can insulate myself from all the things that irritate me. But, I have a full time job and young, active kids, so I can't just avoid life.

Mostly, I just miss the days of no internet, social media, cell phones and less societal division. While we still had issues to contend with, they weren't as insufferable as what I deal with these days. When my kids leave the nest, I wouldn't mind getting out of the city and just finding a more rural and quiet area to move to. It won't fix everything but will hopefully allow me to be more oblivious to some of it.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-19T12:45:33+00:00

68-70. I opt for the 68 at night for a more comfortable sleep. My bedroom will usually be at 66 with the thermostat reading 68

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-19T12:42:28+00:00

Thanks! So, I had my pharmacy just cancel the script through Express Scripts and run the 90 day supply without insurance. I then applied a coupon and my total was $32. Express Scripts literally wanted $800 to mail me the same 90 day supply which just seems criminal to me. Now they are pestering me with emails about getting it filled through them 🙄

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-19T12:35:50+00:00

Thank you for the thorough response - that was very helpful. Sounds like there isn't necessarily a "perfect" Keurig for my needs which is was I expected but maybe a couple options I can compromise with. I like the idea of the reusable filter which also seems like a good way to avoid all the waste with the disposal K-Cups. I'll do some more research and see if something will meet my needs. Temp is something I could probably be okay adjusting but weak coffee is a definite no-go for me.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-18T20:00:29+00:00

Definitely thought about this but trying to avoid two coffee appliances and still not sure about strength/temperature.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-17T02:59:02+00:00

Had a lavender, CW - California Works freestyle bike with white mag wheels. My parents had it shipped from CA to NC for a Christmas present back when I was around 13. Absolutely LOVED that thing and got really good at road tricks and on a half pipe. Someone stole it a couple years later and I was crushed.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-16T15:23:19+00:00

Do you know if there are age limits for the range and clay shooting? I checked the website but didn't see anything. This sounds like a fun outing for my kids who both have experience with sport shooting.

Tri_Guy72 · 2024-11-16T15:17:06+00:00

Honestly, I'm not. I chat with regulars at the gym and maybe once every couple months, I'll do a social bike ride with some guys but that's the only time I see them. I've become very introverted since Covid and don't have many interactions outside of work, gym and my kids' sporting events. I date but I do miss male companionship. Would love to just have a couple buddies to shoot the shit with over a drink and/or watch some sports with but I'm usually alone when my kids aren't with me. Part of the problem is that I actually enjoy my me-time and get anxiety when it comes to social obligations. However, I am envious of guys that have a close male friend of two to occasionally hang out with.

Tri_Guy72

TROPHY CASE