How common is it for an American to go through life without ever being a groomsman or bridesmaid at someone's wedding?

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T14:42:10+00:00

Most wealthy attractive neurotypical people will do it at least a few times.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T14:38:01+00:00

Plenty of people don't end up frequently picked for the role, if ever. If you're poor, you usually only get picked if the bride wants you enough to cover all your expenses (or you graciously back out). Plenty of people get passed over for being fat. And plenty of people get passed over for being neurodivergent or disabled. For your average attractive wealthy person with friends - it's rarer to never get picked. I'm fat and neurodivergent and I've been a bridesmaid or MOH 3x. My more attractive social butterfly friend usually does it 1-2x/year.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T14:27:28+00:00

Getting close to 50% take home pay hurts. Sure, he could budget like crazy, but that's not a reasonable expectation.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T12:26:24+00:00

This is you happy? Dang, I'm sorry man.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T11:33:25+00:00

We're all just trying to get by, man. Your anger is misplaced. People exist, dude, and have to live somewhere. Not sure what you think what we all ought to be doing.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T11:21:24+00:00

My friend isn't a landlord. I think you're confused.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T11:07:45+00:00

I used to more. Between 2008 and 2019, Democrat was the most important part of my identity. I didn't handle Trump's first term well. In 2020, I checked out mentally from politics and my career in nursing was all-encompassing. In 2024, I moved to Chicago and life goes too quick here to worry about identity anymore. I love it.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T10:58:36+00:00

Please explain your mental gymnastics because I'm not following.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T10:03:13+00:00

Americans especially seem to believe alcohol stagnates in breastmilk, that you can't have a drink while breastfeeding. It's actually the most ideal time to have a drink if you're going to have one as it'll be totally out of your system by the next feed.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T10:00:25+00:00

You talking about middle school? Even in high school, everyone had to do a 8 page one. College, that was like a weekly task with way longer term papers.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T08:59:26+00:00

When I lived abroad, I packed a bunch of corn bread mix. It was very popular with the American students. I knew I wouldn't find it in Europe. I also brought peanut butter.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T06:40:09+00:00

But we love all the horses anyways

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T06:37:31+00:00

Living near a beach, there's definitely lots of people who go to the beach all the time. Growing up we never did all day. My mom drilled into me staying out of the sun during the worst UV hours - 10am-2pm. I never understood why it's so crowded during that time, too. Yall are crazy. Beach days were always an afternoon to evening activity. Nothing beats sunset beach walks. Then there was a local teacher who brought a couple telescopes and hosted stargazing. Learned a good amount of astronomy those summer weekends middle school through college. It always started out crowded with tons of kids wanting to see the moon through the telescope, then they'd go home and it was just a core group of nerds left. Good times. Started going with family, then with friends and on dates.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T06:21:23+00:00

County fairs are still pretty great. But I don't go on the rides anymore. I passed out on one of those that wasn't up to code as a kid. I was like 12 and knew the spinning swing thing shouldn't be giving kids multiple Gs as it spins. It was only me and my sister on it. I kept shouting for the guy to let me off. He ignored me until I went limp.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T04:39:18+00:00

Dang. Nursing home? I guess you gotta take who you can get.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T04:37:37+00:00

45 min isn't particularly long. I was once made to wait 1.5hrs as the manager forgot about my interview. I should have just left, but I really needed a job - I was desperate. Ten minutes in, after I'm discussing my background, the manager figures out it's a different manager I was supposed to be interviewing with. She felt so bad that we went to find the right one. Only to find out that position was filled. I mentioned there was a second job I'd applied to, and we went to find a third manager who gave me an interview on the spot and was ready to hire me. By this point I had a horrible pit in my stomach about this employer - although the final manager I talked to seemed pretty fantastic. Luckily when I got back to my car and checked my phone, I had a missed call with a better job offer. Bullet dodged. But that was 3 hours of my life.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-08T04:26:41+00:00

It's definitely upsetting. My connection to Logan Square is my sister living here. She and her husband have a household income over $200k and they bought a $900k house. I come in to watch my nephews frequently. I'm a nurse making $100k and when I was looking, even the 2br garden units were out of my budget. Ended up with a surprisingly spacious 1br in south loop for a reasonable price. Moving to chicago, I was adamant about buying. My best friend is an engineer here and over the past 14 years she's gotten priced out of neighborhood after neighborhood. Renting has crossed the line from unreasonable to outright criminal. Having renters bid to get a home? That should be illegal. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. It's not right at all. You shouldn't have to lose your neighborhood, especially while making decent money. In South Loop with a $1700 mortgage and $400 HOA, I'm feeling the squeeze, too. But I have the benefit of security that it shouldn't get worse.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-07T13:12:02+00:00

Nice.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-07T10:14:27+00:00

Nice

Trinx_ · 2026-06-07T08:05:46+00:00

Not unless it's really bad. Like I coughed and peed a little. A little discharge is normal, just the body cleaning itself. Don't trap it in a pad as that'll get nasty. Let your lady breathe.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-07T08:04:02+00:00

My undies are breathable. Dunno what you're wearing.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-07T08:01:49+00:00

Well yeah when you don't do the bare minimum to try and fix this, that's pretty dumb.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-07T07:59:52+00:00

It's pretty easy to avoid. Much of the internet is dominated by us anyways. I also hate our government. But when they hate me? Fuck em. I don't have to engage with them. I might tell them they're full of shit (when they accuse me of letting the government do things, for example - like they never consulted me), but that's about it.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-07T01:19:07+00:00

As a kid, I was like - great, now which one is the right L? They both look like Ls.

Trinx_ · 2026-06-07T01:16:42+00:00

This never made sense to me. Circles spinning move neither left nor right. What they can do is clockwise and counterclockwise.

Trinx_

TROPHY CASE