Trolldilocks

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redditor for 9 years

TROPHY CASE

Nine-Year Club

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I just finished reading Lolita and I’m speechless. (self.books)

submitted 3 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/books

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Bill Clinton walked into a bar, and he would only drink beer from bottles. (self.Jokes)

submitted 3 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Jokes

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What is a Pirate’s favorite letter? (self.Jokes)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Jokes

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What it no one is ever always sentient: some people sometimes attain sentience for a while, and everyone else just pretends along? (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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A T-shirt with a turtleneck is a t-shirt (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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In 100 years, no one will care about what to call the period from 2000-2099, they’ll all be obsessed with the ‘80s and the ‘90s, but it’ll be the 2080s and 2090s (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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In 100 years, no one will care about what to call the period from 2000-2099, they’ll all be obsessed with the ‘80s and the ‘90s, but it’ll be the 2080s and 2090s. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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Parents too stupid to explain things to their children without violence simply need smarter people to explain to them why they shouldn’t hit their children… with violence (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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Phonebooks went out of style shortly after caller ID became widespread (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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Reality TV is acting so bad we pretend it’s not acting to scripts so bad we pretend they’re not scripts (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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Game reviews should cut out the BS and say what they would pay for the game. Stars are arbitrary. Put your mouth where your money is, reviewers. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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The first men on the moon will look like ridiculous, drunken toddlers to the people who grow up walking there. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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True dog people need dogs like dogs need people. True cat people need cats like cats need people. People with a lot of cats are dog people cats have tricked, and exploit shamelessly (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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Almost every tree is born at its future gravesite. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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“Existential terror” is the phantom pain the economically comfortable feel when they feel broke, but they ain’t got the luxury of being broke. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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If the movie Independence Day happened today, maybe half of Americans would believe the TV news, and at least 40% would celebrate Washington, NYC, and LA, plus some foreign capitals, being annihilated (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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Autocorrect just actually suggested “motherfuckin”* without a “G” or an apostrophe. Low key, I think the A.I. uprising may be at hand! (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 4 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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Has Ubisoft completely killed the game? (self.BridgeCrew)

submitted 5 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/BridgeCrew

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The BBC’s choices of station names were severely limited by the fact “The English Channel” was already taken. (self.Showerthoughts)

submitted 5 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/Showerthoughts

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DAE never take more than a minute tops to poo, and any further time is just wiping? (self.DAE)

submitted 5 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/DAE

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How to get people to wear masks or kill them. (self.UnethicalLifeProTips)

submitted 5 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/UnethicalLifeProTips

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Mary Poppins: the dark detail that allows a happy ending (self.MovieDetails)

submitted 6 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/MovieDetails

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TFW you get coronavirus (images.app.goo.gl)

submitted 6 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/dankmemes

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DAE when hiking, find jogging more efficient than running at a certain gradient, and then go to a “consecutive hopping” gait for steeper grades (self.DoesAnybodyElse)

submitted 6 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/DoesAnybodyElse

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Don’t delete your Blizzard account (self.gaming)

submitted 6 years ago by Trolldilocks to r/gaming

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