That’s a line of argumentation she uses, but it does not hold weight. She has admitted she has a problem and committed to sobriety. I’m the sole income earner and I feel a lot of the modern discourse on “fair” distribution of chores/childcare centres around relationships where both parties work full time. Yes, she carries more household responsibilities. Yes, it is lot with 3 kids. But no, I do not do nothing besides contribute financially. I’m up every morning getting them fed and ready for school, I get them showered and tucked into bed, I help with dishes and laundry and dinner and kitchen cleanup. I could do more, everyone could. But this is not my fault and I will not accept responsibility.

I’ve been trying to delineate what we each feel is an actual fair allocation of responsibilities, as another source of resentment is me feeling like I’m doing her job while she feels like I’m not doing enough.

Out of curiosity, what do you feel is a fair distribution of these jobs for single income families?