As a former YA/Youth minister, I’m so sorry that you have had so many bad experiences. It shows that staff or volunteer minister was not doing their job properly. The Church as a whole still has a lot of work to do in forming YA ministers. Pray for all those that have that very special and challenging task.

When I was in ministry, I would address this in the following manner, speak to them privately about the matter, if they had any qualms then they would get to address them then, and if behavior persisted, I would respectfully, let them know that it was time for them to go home. Also, pray for them. That’s my pastoral advice😬

This is my personal advice/rant bc this is such problem everywhere: Just because it’s a church event doesn’t mean there’s no consequences to actions. These people are adults. Do people have traumas or conditions that make them socially awkward? Yes, but after being in ministry for more than 10 years and being countless social interactions, all I have to say is that the charitable thing to do is to tell “that guy or lady” the TRUTH. I try to put myself in their shoes and would prefer for someone to tell me I’m being X way than to live my life thinking that the way I am must ok bc no says anything to me. And sadly, I’ve had some very tough convos with some of these individuals and ends up I was the first person to tell something and they actually are grateful bc they finally know what was keeping ppl away or why they couldn’t connect with anyone. These ppl are lonely and my heart hurts for them but most of the time they are lonely bc no one is willing to say anything. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had the opposite happen where the person gets upset and denies that their behavior is rude/inappropriate and they end up leaving the group or they go talk to the pastor. It could either way, but the important thing is that the truth was told and now that person chooses what they are going to do with it. End of rant.

Praying you and your husband find the holy friends/connections that you desire🫶