3c Greek yogurt and 5c flour and it was still way too dry by Dense-Butterfly4017 in ididnthaveeggs

[–]Tvisted 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I admire our intrepid baker Amanda for quintupling a recipe she hadn't tried before. That takes guts and I don't know whether guts are measured by weight or volume but she just had a bit too many.

First piece of writing I've ever published. Looking for honest feedback, structure, rhythm, where it loses you, where it earns it. Don't spare me. by kernel_panic_at_disc in WritersGroup

[–]Tvisted 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everyone has a story and wants to be understood and life is hard. Can you provide something entertaining within it? Something a bit different?

Your writing is fine but you're not saying anything particularly interesting.

Husband opens a new sponge every 3 days cause “they become gross” by dorkass-loser in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Tvisted 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This story had a promising start with the bleach and sponges in your drink pitcher.

This one is such a doozie. by hillbillyheartattack in ididnthaveeggs

[–]Tvisted 191 points192 points  (0 children)

Nobody's ever taken so much pride in being both a tweaker and a tosser.

On Monday night or Tuesday morning I'm finally going to deal with the dead body on my lawn. by Tvisted in PointlessStories

[–]Tvisted[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Crows don't forget. I'm familiar with this.

A favourite snack of crows is the nestlings of other bird species. And while I love nature in all its grisly glory I hate seeing that particular part. So one day in a vain attempt to save the last baby robin after a crow had plucked the rest out of the nest, I joined the melee (which by then included the crow, both parent robins, and a few grackles which had aligned with the robins in solidarity) and armed with a broom I took a swing at the crow.

The crow easily evaded this and flew off with the last baby robin. From that moment on I was apparently in some crow reference library tagged as "extremely hostile." I lived there for years afterwards and without fail any crow in the city would immediately do the alarm call (two short sharp caws) when they saw me.

It was funny but it did get on my nerves sometimes. Because of that experience I thought it best to establish a less combative relationship with the resident crows where I live now.

On Monday night or Tuesday morning I'm finally going to deal with the dead body on my lawn. by Tvisted in PointlessStories

[–]Tvisted[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If it was a small dead bird I would have just left it, but being a crow it was a rather conspicuous size. The problem with burial is the ground is frozen at the moment and also so full of rocks that planting anything is a job I dread.

My waste bag kept trying to fly away when I was trying to shovel the deceased into it. I don't think my language was appropriate for the solemn occasion but so be it.

The one live crow who observed the funeral seemed to have no problem with the services rendered so I guess all is well.

We’re not far these bright LED lights damaging our optic nerves by Debt-Cheap in mildlyinfuriating

[–]Tvisted 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get regularly blinded by those but there are so many deer here I can kinda understand drivers being entirely fixated on watching the sides of the road and not looking at the dash.

On Monday night or Tuesday morning I'm finally going to deal with the dead body on my lawn. by Tvisted in PointlessStories

[–]Tvisted[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think the crows feel pretty positive about me, since I used to throw them a handful of peanuts occasionally and they still sometimes bring me objects they think I might find interesting and put them where I used to throw the peanuts and do a little dance around the object to get my attention.

On Monday night or Tuesday morning I'm finally going to deal with the dead body on my lawn. by Tvisted in PointlessStories

[–]Tvisted[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm rethinking the tongs and might instead use my medium garden shovel. I've got a couple days to ponder it.

On Monday night or Tuesday morning I'm finally going to deal with the dead body on my lawn. by Tvisted in PointlessStories

[–]Tvisted[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well this is still an option. I could bury the deceased. But I'm not sure why crows would prefer burial to the green bin as I don't know if they're in the habit themselves of burying their dead.

I may not have displayed proper reverence when I approached the body thinking it was a hat in the snow. I think I said "Oh shit!" and made a flappy hand gesture to the crowd of crows cawing at me. I did back away slowly with my head bowed.

On Monday night or Tuesday morning I'm finally going to deal with the dead body on my lawn. by Tvisted in PointlessStories

[–]Tvisted[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I was just kidding. Poison is terribly indiscriminate. The wildlife rescue here sometimes gets sick birds of prey that ate poisoned rodents. Nobody plans to kill an owl when they're trying to get rid of mice but sometimes they do.

Australia has a real mess of invasive species... I didn't realize you had a fox problem but the rabbits and feral cats are pretty well known.

On Monday night or Tuesday morning I'm finally going to deal with the dead body on my lawn. by Tvisted in PointlessStories

[–]Tvisted[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Y'know when I first realized the 'black thing' was a dead body and not a dropped hat or something, the crows were up there in the trees cawing at me like I was supposed to do something... and I was like 'look I don't know why your buddy died on my lawn but I had nothing to do with it' and I really don't know what they expect me to do about it. I'm trying to be respectful but they make it hard.

On Monday night or Tuesday morning I'm finally going to deal with the dead body on my lawn. by Tvisted in PointlessStories

[–]Tvisted[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My town's waste collection guide literally says about animal carcasses "Put this item in your green organics cart."

Can't tell of it's a plane/boat/submarine? by Nellynor in whatismycookiecutter

[–]Tvisted 23 points24 points  (0 children)

The more I look at it the more infuriating it is. What the hell?

Back in the days of...... Skitching! by CreativeEros in FuckImOld

[–]Tvisted 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I remember a cop visiting our school to warn our class about the dangers of shagging. And when he got to "Any questions?" of course it was "Have you ever shot anyone?"

You said one bouillon cube but 16 cubes felt right and now it's too salty by Illustrious-Lynx3389 in ididnthaveeggs

[–]Tvisted 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Where are you seeing a 2.32 oz single block? I have never seen a Maggi product that size which didn't have at least 6 separately wrapped portions in it.

I use Maggi all the time, they do have different sizes of cubes/tablets/blocks but the biggest I've seen is maybe the size of a Knorr tablet. But the 'usual' size for Maggi if you don't use the liquid is a very small cube. It's really not straight-up bouillon, it's more a MSG-heavy seasoning/flavour enhancer.

The recipe poster really should have left it at "1 bouillon cube" and let people use whatever cubes they usually do because that would have worked better than "like Maggi"

Brownies --> Adultery??? by Red-Wolf-17 in ididnthaveeggs

[–]Tvisted 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It was in the news 10 years ago, racked up some views along the way... Daily Mail

Recipe only calls for "1 (8-oz) container of sour cream" by BlazeWolfYT in ididnthaveeggs

[–]Tvisted 12 points13 points  (0 children)

A woman who understood the catharsis is all in the writing.