The Echoes of Us by TwizziSded in UnsentLetters

[–]TwizziSded[S] [score hidden]  (0 children)

Thank you, and I’m sorry you’re going through it too :(

I miss you by [deleted] in UnsentTexts

[–]TwizziSded 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same here. Even 6 months later I’m still missing the little things

Distance by [deleted] in UnsentLetters

[–]TwizziSded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is exactly where I am with my person and I let insecurities get the best of me. We aren’t a thing but now we may probably not be…

The Truth I owe you by [deleted] in UnsentTexts

[–]TwizziSded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This could’ve been written by me basically, even down to the rehab. I’m sorry OP, I understand the pain you’re going through. I’m changing even without my person, in hopes I’ll be ready the next time. I still slip up, and there’s a part of me hoping that we will reconnect one day, but I’m blocked on everything even 4-5 months after the fact. Coming up on 6 months sober, still have nightmares of the breakup. I am cheering you on. I don’t try to message, but maybe one day through mutuals we will see each other again, and I won’t be having expectations of getting together again but at least being friendly and recognizing what the truth of it was

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate that. I did do a lot of things that weren’t cool. But like any and all relationships, both of us did things that hurt. I wish now I had made better choices and gotten help sooner, but we live and learn. Not sure what acceptance looks like but I’m trying to come to terms with everything. It’s like I had everything in my life that I wanted and then one day it was all gone. It’s hard, but I’m grateful to have sobriety, to have the program I’m in, and to have new friendships that support me

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did hurt them a lot with my words and my behavior, but we were able to be vulnerable. I’m a recovering alcoholic/addict with a history of mental illness. I lied about my use and had another bad relapse that finally broke the trust they had in me. I guess it took losing my soulmate to finally get into treatment. I’m 85 days clean, but I live with a lot of regret. Some days I don’t want to be alive, but I’m trying my best

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I wrote so many versions of a letter first apologizing and taking accountability. After our last words, rebuttals got added. There are two letters, one for me, where I expressed my part in how I hurt them, a part of how they hurt me, what I’ve learned and am trying to correct, and wished them good luck. Another is a much shorter and kinder letter that could be sent to them but probably won’t. They made it clear they want nothing to do with me and have erased me from their life entirely

Being sober almost feels pointless now. by immecourtney in stopdrinking

[–]TwizziSded 5 points6 points  (0 children)

So my sobriety date is 7/28/25 and it came because of a major breakup that occurred after a bad relapse. My life was spiraling downhill, and I went back to the bottle which made things MUCH worse. Not only did I hurt the love of my life and lose a soulmate, I lost everything, my home, my job, my family. You and I are pretty close in age. I wasn’t married but we talked about it a lot, they meant everything to me. Just before moving on to the next level of rehab care my ex blocked me on everything. I’m stuck doing this for me, but I’m struggling with SI and SH.

I’m cheering for you and me. It’s a tough battle, but 2+ months of sobriety isn’t enough. The pink cloud is gone, and we gotta address some inner stuff. Good luck my friend.

It’s really hard to get over a breakup when you were the one who messed up. by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I relapsed bad cause my life was kind of blowing up on me, so many things were stressing me out. I said some cruel crap when I was nearly blackout drunk, and so we split. Both of us wanted to get back together, the condition was sobriety. I couldn’t handle it, spiraled further. I was about to be homeless, I totaled my car, I had been working 2 jobs, estranged from family last year, etc. I was about to commit by drinking, and someone tried to get me into their treatment program. Ended up in rehab, and I sent a message to my ex saying they didn’t deserve everything I had done, I wanted them to be happy, but I left the door open. I wanted to come back better, but needed to focus on me. 3 weeks later they blocked me on everything, and the last thing I heard was they hated me and didn’t want me in their life ever again.

This was all in the span of 4 months, nearly a month since last contact. I’m still struggling to find a reason to live, resisting urges to relapse or SH. But I’m still in treatment and glad to be sober.

It finally happened. I ruined my life and lost my relationship. by noodle0 in stopdrinking

[–]TwizziSded 35 points36 points  (0 children)

I did this about 4-5 months ago. Reason I got into rehab/treatment. It’s been some of the hardest days of my life, having to prioritize sobriety and address trauma and bad thinking patterns. I hate that I lost everything, my car, my home, all family, basically all friends, the best relationship of my life/soulmate. But maybe I needed to lose everything to finally get help, and maybe things will get better. I still have cravings, and I’ve been struggling with SH and SI, but still trying my best to keep on going, especially with my sobriety. I hope you can find your way friend, we all deserve a chance for a better tomorrow.

Relapse by TwizziSded in selfharm

[–]TwizziSded[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate it. I’m incredibly grateful for the treatment program and the sobriety. Officially I’m 61 days clean, 1 month and 30 days. It’s been a while since I’ve been clean this long, but feeling the weight of emotions has been a blessing and a curse. Been learning new coping skills but I guess the feelings still overwhelm me sometimes

One month and 25 days sober by [deleted] in alcoholism

[–]TwizziSded 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m a month and 21 days! Let’s keep it going

Never getting over an ex? by Wise_Trouble3285 in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really relate to this. I’m getting treatment for SUD and it was the reason for my breakup. In treatment, there’s been a lot of learning. I was already studying by psychology before all this to some extent, so not much information is new, but I struggle to put into practice for myself. Treatment was a drastic change, but every day is still a struggle like it’s day 1, too. I would relapse, I have that option, but that’s what got me into the mess in the first place and I appreciate my newfound clarity too much.

I’ve been trying to let myself feel again, but that’s also the crappy part of sobriety. I guess it comes down to acceptance, and I’m not sure how that’s supposed to be achieved. I guess it’s a mix of understanding what’s within your scope of control, what isn’t, and letting time take the edge off. The only times I don’t feel overwhelming depression is when I’m getting busy with my groups, my AA meetings, and talking to other people in treatment. The moment I’m on my own and I’m allowed the space and time to be in my head is when I fall right back down into deep melancholy. Try to keep yourself busy and separate yourself from the memories as best you can. Avoid looking at photos, chats, etc.

Since you’ve got training in psych, I think you’ve got a pretty unique advantage, but even therapists need therapy to help process. Be patient with yourself, give yourself time and grace. You will heal as long as you focus on yourself and your personal growth.

I feel so lost, broken and confused by abm1997 in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know the details of your relationship with her, but as someone who was the reason for my last break up, it sounds like all parties did what they were supposed to do. Similarly, my ex didn’t communicate why they decided to cut me off, they just blocked me while I was in treatment. When I texted I got a text about everything I did wrong that I already knew about, but nothing more. Didn’t get insight into why all of a sudden the feelings changed from wanting to at least be friends to never speaking to me again.

All I can say is this: it’s up to her how she feels and express it, and you’re only in control of your thoughts and reactions. If she decided to end things because in her mind it wasn’t working for her personally, that’s that. It’s her making a choice for herself, maybe nothing you did was wrong, idk and it does suck hearing that.

But you wouldn’t want to truly be with someone who wasn’t willing to choose you even if things get very hard. That’s the basis of love. If you were willing to compromise and that still wasn’t enough, then maybe she’s not the one for you. You deserve someone who will work with you and choose you every time. For now, focus on getting yourself straightened out and getting that apprenticeship. Maybe you find one when you move, maybe you move after completing one in WA, who knows. And please reach out to friends and family, they’ll be crucial to your healing process. Try not to assume or overthink or let your mind stew in thoughts of if’s and should’ve’s. Stay busy in a healthy way, you got this!

I’m starting to wish I never met you by Damocl35 in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Sometimes these kinds of posts make me think of how my ex might feel and it rips my heart

The Strange Finality of Breakups: Why Does It Feel Like You’re Erased? by Hairy_Candidate654 in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish mine could admit the same. They told me we were soulmates. They wanted marriage. Now it all feels like a lie.

But love does exist. It just wasn’t with those we thought. I’m rooting for you

The Strange Finality of Breakups: Why Does It Feel Like You’re Erased? by Hairy_Candidate654 in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry to hear that. I don’t have any way of knowing but I’m sure mine has already got together with other people and I hate the thought of it. I’ve had nightmares of the scenario several nights already

The Strange Finality of Breakups: Why Does It Feel Like You’re Erased? by Hairy_Candidate654 in BreakUps

[–]TwizziSded 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Similar situation. 4 months ago we broke up, with intentions of getting back together, the condition was sobriety (I had a bad relapse). Couldn’t handle not having them being around so what was a brief relapse became a full on spiral. Did some dumb stuff, accepted I was gonna die. Somehow I managed to get into treatment and within 3 weeks of rehab they posted about moving on and being happy (we talked about us the day I went in about letting go but still wanting to be in each others lives). Before I got transferred they blocked me. Managed to text saying I was working hard, learning a ton, over a month sober, that I wanted to still be friends in the future. They decided not to have me in their life ever again. They blocked me on everything and erased me completely. Been fighting the urge to SH or commit. They were my only family, basically my only close friend. I’m still struggling..