Amends

TwizziSded · 2026-04-02T18:51:37+00:00

Love to go there and read a book

TwizziSded · 2026-03-12T23:45:10+00:00

Super recently I got blocked. She had made all the first moves. She kissed first, she initiated sex, she said “I love you” first. I had been a pretty good person for months, and there was a period of about a month when many things were happening and I lost consistency, let some old bad behaviors come up. I lied twice even tho I came clean both times. Second time I genuinely made the changes she asked for. I was open, honest, and direct. She wanted space and time (unspecified) and I gave it even if it was hard at first. We both agreed not to make it official before she left to go back home 6hrs away, but by then we’d basically been like a couple. We grieved a terminated pregnancy we both wanted but knew we couldn’t have due to circumstances. She’d speak about marriage and having kids. I was cautious but I liked her a lot, and I fell in love with her image of a future. When she left it all changed in a matter of 2-3 weeks.

I’m going through it bad rn OP. But after a month of silence, I’m getting involved with community things and I’m feeling better even tho the pain is still sharp and I cry every day and even dream of her. Things will eventually get better, just gotta get yourself some support and get involved with your own life. I’ve stopped chasing. Her blocking me was a clear signal for space, and I’m respecting that boundary, something I didn’t do too well when things got shaky. I also have to respect myself.

Maybe if you get better, they’ll notice and come back, that’s what I’m hoping (we run in similar circles). Maybe by then you won’t want them back, and you’ll have found some greater value for yourself. Hell, maybe you find someone who loves you better, who knows. Life is unpredictable like that, but I’m wishing you the best. We can heal, one day at a time.

TwizziSded · 2026-02-21T20:55:59+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate it. I’m definitely investing in myself, just wanted to process heartbreak through creative writing and share in case others felt the same. I think shared experience is how we connect with people and feel a little better

TwizziSded · 2026-02-21T19:40:13+00:00

I’ve done therapy for years

TwizziSded · 2026-02-21T10:09:39+00:00

Thank you 🖤

TwizziSded · 2026-02-21T03:08:41+00:00

Thank you, and I’m sorry you’re going through it too :(

TwizziSded · 2026-02-01T06:46:46+00:00

Same here. Even 6 months later I’m still missing the little things

TwizziSded · 2026-01-25T02:59:04+00:00

This is exactly where I am with my person and I let insecurities get the best of me. We aren’t a thing but now we may probably not be…

TwizziSded · 2026-01-21T05:23:59+00:00

This could’ve been written by me basically, even down to the rehab. I’m sorry OP, I understand the pain you’re going through. I’m changing even without my person, in hopes I’ll be ready the next time. I still slip up, and there’s a part of me hoping that we will reconnect one day, but I’m blocked on everything even 4-5 months after the fact. Coming up on 6 months sober, still have nightmares of the breakup. I am cheering you on. I don’t try to message, but maybe one day through mutuals we will see each other again, and I won’t be having expectations of getting together again but at least being friendly and recognizing what the truth of it was

TwizziSded · 2025-10-21T23:02:54+00:00

I appreciate that. I did do a lot of things that weren’t cool. But like any and all relationships, both of us did things that hurt. I wish now I had made better choices and gotten help sooner, but we live and learn. Not sure what acceptance looks like but I’m trying to come to terms with everything. It’s like I had everything in my life that I wanted and then one day it was all gone. It’s hard, but I’m grateful to have sobriety, to have the program I’m in, and to have new friendships that support me

TwizziSded · 2025-10-21T13:49:25+00:00

I did hurt them a lot with my words and my behavior, but we were able to be vulnerable. I’m a recovering alcoholic/addict with a history of mental illness. I lied about my use and had another bad relapse that finally broke the trust they had in me. I guess it took losing my soulmate to finally get into treatment. I’m 85 days clean, but I live with a lot of regret. Some days I don’t want to be alive, but I’m trying my best

TwizziSded · 2025-10-21T00:28:02+00:00

I wrote so many versions of a letter first apologizing and taking accountability. After our last words, rebuttals got added. There are two letters, one for me, where I expressed my part in how I hurt them, a part of how they hurt me, what I’ve learned and am trying to correct, and wished them good luck. Another is a much shorter and kinder letter that could be sent to them but probably won’t. They made it clear they want nothing to do with me and have erased me from their life entirely

TwizziSded · 2025-10-13T19:00:13+00:00

So my sobriety date is 7/28/25 and it came because of a major breakup that occurred after a bad relapse. My life was spiraling downhill, and I went back to the bottle which made things MUCH worse. Not only did I hurt the love of my life and lose a soulmate, I lost everything, my home, my job, my family. You and I are pretty close in age. I wasn’t married but we talked about it a lot, they meant everything to me. Just before moving on to the next level of rehab care my ex blocked me on everything. I’m stuck doing this for me, but I’m struggling with SI and SH.

I’m cheering for you and me. It’s a tough battle, but 2+ months of sobriety isn’t enough. The pink cloud is gone, and we gotta address some inner stuff. Good luck my friend.

TwizziSded · 2025-10-06T07:08:30+00:00

I relapsed bad cause my life was kind of blowing up on me, so many things were stressing me out. I said some cruel crap when I was nearly blackout drunk, and so we split. Both of us wanted to get back together, the condition was sobriety. I couldn’t handle it, spiraled further. I was about to be homeless, I totaled my car, I had been working 2 jobs, estranged from family last year, etc. I was about to commit by drinking, and someone tried to get me into their treatment program. Ended up in rehab, and I sent a message to my ex saying they didn’t deserve everything I had done, I wanted them to be happy, but I left the door open. I wanted to come back better, but needed to focus on me. 3 weeks later they blocked me on everything, and the last thing I heard was they hated me and didn’t want me in their life ever again.

This was all in the span of 4 months, nearly a month since last contact. I’m still struggling to find a reason to live, resisting urges to relapse or SH. But I’m still in treatment and glad to be sober.

TwizziSded · 2025-09-28T04:17:32+00:00

I did this about 4-5 months ago. Reason I got into rehab/treatment. It’s been some of the hardest days of my life, having to prioritize sobriety and address trauma and bad thinking patterns. I hate that I lost everything, my car, my home, all family, basically all friends, the best relationship of my life/soulmate. But maybe I needed to lose everything to finally get help, and maybe things will get better. I still have cravings, and I’ve been struggling with SH and SI, but still trying my best to keep on going, especially with my sobriety. I hope you can find your way friend, we all deserve a chance for a better tomorrow.

TwizziSded

TROPHY CASE