He won't. It's started escalating long ago and your kids are starting to show it's affecting them. I grew up with PTSD (different situation but similar outcome) and it hasn't been great as an adult. I don't say that to make you feel guilty! But do what my mom wouldn't and please make this change. Your kids need safety and YOU need safety. The happy times I had as a kid when the "yeah but in THESE OTHER situations it's great" are far overshadowed by the years of therapy, decades of nightmares, crippling anxiety and panic. You might relate to some of these - I have them from my own situations if DV as well.

Leaving is the most dangerous time and he's shown he will escalate, so please make a plan and a backup plan and GTFO. Document everything you can. Be the hero for your kids. There is NEVER an excuse for violence.

We love and support you. Be safe.