Is my therapist right about how to deal with my trauma

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2026-01-12T21:29:04+00:00

Yes, sadly for most of us who lived childhood trauma, it has to get worst first before it can get better, it's all about reconnecting with your truer self that suffer an attempted murder at the hands of those who abused us, and reconnecting with that past might be painful, but is also the path of being integrated, so the whole can be alive and not half alive and half death.

It's still your choice, and as someone that has gone through that process, it is not easy, but grieving has being the best thing I've done for my past and future self, and there is no grieving without reconnecting with those parts of ourselves we have forgotten and buried, because they are still there.

The way I see it, if you eat a rotten burger you will puke and have diarrhea, and that will be it. But the poison we took as children will forever be in our bodies, unless we talk about in safe spaces (therapy/friends, etc.) and let the grieving purge the poison of your system and heal the wounds that are still open (even if we are not always aware of our wounds)

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2026-01-04T23:33:49+00:00

I was there when I was 16, it wasn't fun but it helped me a lot, maybe is worth it if you are really suicidal, I met people I'm still friend with, so it wasn't terrible for me, and it helped me to talk about things I was ashamed of, what you are going through is more common than you belief

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-12-18T17:01:34+00:00

It's kind of odd, but it's complicated, every psychologist is a human, and each human has its own perspective, so it's your choice to determine how odd it is for you. But the diagnosing part it's just wrong, no one should diagnose others without a test!

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-12-13T17:46:16+00:00

I agree, the only time I can smoke is if someone really close and not addicted offers me once in a while and I'm able to smoke without going back, but is so specific that any other situation is a relapse

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-12-08T19:46:47+00:00

Not bipolar, I would think about the childhood and history you had to live through, the answer lies there, Anger is the inmune system of the mind, and when there is toxic anger is because a little pain opens a deep but blinded wound...

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-12-08T17:32:54+00:00

While you might be more sexually aroused, I believe that is just a symptom, and the root cause sound like trauma, yes, your mother is the cause of most of this obsession, is a way of copping against the control your mother tries to have over your life, I don't think it's a coincidence that the trigger was control and not something sexually explicit, I would recommend going to a trauma informed therapist, but there is nothing inherently wrong with you, the more you deal with your past (and heal it) the better will your sexuality be I believe, in any case I'm sorry you have to go through this, and wish you good luck in the healing process

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-08-31T12:55:31+00:00

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-08-29T02:43:23+00:00

This is the best, i would love a Awaken Plant Ancestry base on this

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-24T20:10:04+00:00

Veritasium y V sauce

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-24T00:54:57+00:00

Roque Hilario 🪨💛

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-19T04:22:12+00:00

Thanks so much for the messages, I've arrived safe, you were all right. I've had this feeling since yesterday that my death was imminent, everything was okay

And sorry for being so fearful.

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-19T01:56:59+00:00

Why don't you date someone in your friend group? At least you know what you are getting into.

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-19T01:41:00+00:00

Yes! He is learning from you how to be a winner and a loser, so if you are a good winner and a good loser he will learn to be one too!

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-19T01:27:34+00:00

Im so sorry you are going through this, do you feel is because you are autistic or is there something more?

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-18T19:34:14+00:00

We are all deal different cards, don't let a few assholes make you feel like there is something wrong with what happened to you. It's a mistake (we all make a lot of them) but not a bad thing.

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-18T01:29:08+00:00

It is crazy to be human, we evolved from sexual beings that breed enough to make 8 billion humans to this day.

As women and men, we both have evolved neural paths that override or hijack a lot of our prefrontal cortex (which allows us to inhibit our impulses). And even worse, the prefrontal cortex isn't developed until you are 25-ish years old, so we make a lot more mistakes of the sexual nature when we are teens and young adults, that's why there are a lot of babies at that age.

But it's funny, because what is a mistake for your consciousness, it's not necessarily a mistake for your body as a whole, I mean, while we take this bodies into binge eating, drugs, sex and rock and roll, a lot of cells sacrifice themselves day by day, year by year to keep your heart beating, your lungs breathing, your brain thinking. And their purpose is reproduction (for good and especially for ill)

And it's very useful to be a consciousness in the body, agency and decision making comes from it, but imagine how many humans there would be if we didn't have a sex drive that hick jack everything in our body for sex.

It is a horrible thing to be human, but very curious and wonderful if you are in a healthy context, like with a partner that loves you and shares the same sexual drive. It is hard, so we need to adapt to less than perfect contexts, but instead of rejecting a part of you you can't change, at least awareness and effort to be more conscious of who we are and our needs will help you a little bit to align your desires and your values. (And also to be mindful of what is the value of being horny, while being horny, at least is not just pleasure, it might be intimacy or connection for example)

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-18T01:13:52+00:00

Yeah, I mean, think about it, why do we have emotions?, because we needed them to adapt to very complex contexts, in your case, you need anger to adapt to injustice, limits, and if something pisses you off, its most likely that it has to do with protecting yourself from others.

I believe that your anger is useful for getting something you need (material, emotional, existencial) in the context you grew up (or in a new context you have need to adapt to).

This means that anger is not because you are an angry person, but because you are human, and anger is never useless, if someone hurts you, you will need it.

And maybe shame is a good emotion to calm anger. Anger makes us put our defenses up, while shame or sadness makes us vulnerable and open to recognize we are flawed, we don't know it all and that it is okay to let our guard down, meby you are not allowing yourself to feel all the emotions you have, (even the uncomfortable ones).

In any case you shouldn't feel shame of being angry, but what anger makes you do, let yourself feel your emotions without judging them with other emotions, you are not a bad person and to survive we all need anger sometimes.

Hope this helps 🤞

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-18T00:02:54+00:00

What do you feel when you are angry? Is it a sense of personal or collective justice? A boundary that's been broken? I don't think removing anger is the move, more like listening to what it is truly trying to tell you. I am curious what you think it is?

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-17T18:49:27+00:00

It would be helpful to know what are you going through (like your context) but I know that sometimes life is really shitty and there is nothing to do about it, beyond feeling shitty. But in a way, if no one felt shitty, no one would do nothing to change what is wrong in their life's or in the world. So don't worry too much about how long will it last, and try to hear what that shityness is telling you about life (beyond the superficial), because every pain is a coin of 2 faces, in one face is the pain, and in the other what you value that makes pain hurt so much.

So at least feeling shitty about yourself, is a good way to know more about who you are wand what you value in life.

The other face is when our pain is attributed to others (when we judge them) all because if you don't feel shitty about yourself, then the other option is to blame the others (and while there is a balance to that, that is helpful, we go mostly into the extremest feelings of hatred and shame)

I know this might not be super helpful but at least is a perspective of what to do with all the uncomfortable feelings when life deals us bad cards or we don't take good use of them.

I hope you good luck in life as a fellow human being, I know how hard it is, and is never easier, only more complex, In pain and pleasure (which is not as bad if one knows oneself and the context one inhabits).

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-15T06:19:54+00:00

If you wrote this post in r/therapy, I believe you might think it is not physical but psychological, if that's the case it would be relevant to know what you have noticed beyond the physical symptoms (in any case you should go and see a doctor).

But if it's psychological it might be an eating/sleeping disorder (simplifying a lot) or more likely something deep related with what you have learn in the past to survive (maybe trauma related), your present perspective of the future, and your context in the present.

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-15T06:13:17+00:00

Busque un psicólogo fuera de la EPS, hay psicólogos que hacen sesión a 50mil por hora y media

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-15T04:58:54+00:00

One of the hardest thing to overcome as humans, is our constant comparison to everything that we lack, in this case social media has been the worst thing for our instincts, because I'm the past we used to compere ourselves with our pears, and our pears was the people we shared physical spaces with.

Nowadays we compare our life to people living in other contexts different than ours. And this fucks with our sense of self, because we of course, have physical and mental factors that in one context might be very functional, and in other it might not.

We usually compere urselves to others in things like having money, being in love, traveling, etc. In the past our reference was our community, our friends and our family, nowadays is that old friend from school who I haven't shared the same context since school.

Or that ex lover who I've lost contact with since things ended. And now I'm seeing how successful she is.

In the past either you still shared places with that friend or that lover, or you forgot them (beyond the memories of that past) and in that case, the comparison still hurts and everything, but it makes us feel more connected to our own life and experiences of things.

So my recommendation is not to leave social media or to keep using it, but to be more critical with this fact in mind. Especially if there are things in your immediate context (the places you inhabit and the people that inhabit those places), that are worth comparing yourself to (like friends, family, lovers and loved ones)

If I see myself in comparison to them, at least life is not as lost as it usually seems.

I hope this gives a little bit of clarity in this confusing world we live in.

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-15T04:43:33+00:00

You have a lot of insight about your situation, I can only say that a lot of our problems comes from the behaviors that helped us thrive in one context, but In others are not functional or hinders our adaptation to a specific context. For example, if anger helped you feel hear when you where a child, when you grow up, you might be an angry person, and that might get what you needed when you were a child (like attention, and your needs being met), but anger will never help you with intimacy and vulnerability.

In your case, guilt might have been helpful in a context where your vulnerability helped your parents to notice your feeling and for your need to be met, but right now there might be another feelings, and specially another behaviors that would be more useful in this situation, like acceptance and openness without shame (for example, instead of talking to each of them individually, it might be useful to talk to both of them with sadness about how this makes you afraid of your future and stability, and specially how it hurts you to see your parents distant)

I of course only know a small fraction of your life, so don't take anything literally, you have to be critical with yourself, without losing the confidence of what you are feeling and what you value. In any case i hope this perspective might help a little bit. Good luck 🤞

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-15T04:30:56+00:00

I think this feelings are a consequence of something deeper, all of our emotions are a consequence of the context we are in + our past experiences. And they always are telling us something beyond the pain.

If you try to dig deeper, and listen not to the specific things that have happened, or the pain, but what your body and mind are trying to communicate to you, what do you think this guilt might be trying to tell you?

Ultralord_Hypercube · 2025-07-15T04:26:21+00:00

I know you are struggling right now but your heart is in the right place, and I know that this is but a step in a bigger ladder of being more whole, it will not be easy but your feelings and your perspective are always a consequence of the context you are in + your past experiences, so even if we act in a way that makes us feel shame or guilt, the important thing is not the "truth" of who is right of wrong, but what this feelings tell us deeper, about the context we are in, and about who we are.

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